Her Darkness, His Light
by BreakingBadLikeABoss
Summary: In a twist of fate, Rey and Kylo Ren are forced to survive together during a snowstorm on Hoth. Rey finds herself beginning to question what it is she wants. Kylo Ren knows what he wants and he intends to take it. Kylo Ren wants her. Reylo
1. Fates Entwined

**Hi everyone! I saw the new Star Wars movie last weekend, and I loved it so much I felt the need to contribute something to this fandom! This is unabashed Reylo, so for the purposes of this story we will assume that Rey's past is murky, but she is in no way related to Kylo Ren. This story will be rated M for adult language and sexual content, so read at your own risk, you've been warned! Anyways, hope you guys enjoy the story! Feedback is always appreciated! I would love to hear from you!**

 **Chapter 1: Entwined Fates**

He stood fifteen feet away from her, arms crossed defiantly over his chest.

"I'm not going back there, so you might as well turn around and leave me be."

Rey felt her anger rising, but she managed to keep herself calm. _Breath in. Breathe out_ she repeated to herself, closing her eyes briefly. When she felt that she was calm, Rey reached for her lightsaber, igniting it in one swift motion. Across from her, Kylo Ren followed suit, igniting his crude blade as well.

"I don't want to fight you," he warned.

"Why?" she taunted. "Afraid you'll lose again?"

 _That_ got the response she wanted. Kylo Ren's handsome face twisted in rage, the scar that she had given him only serving to make him look more grotesque.

"Fight me!" she challenged. "I win, you come back with me. You win, I let you go. Unless you're frightened that is…"

With a roar of indignation, Kylo Ren charged her, his red saber swinging through the air. Rey parried his blow with her own blue saber. She went on the attack then, striking hard. Kylo Ren blocked first one blow, then another, swinging fast to dispense a few of his own.

Red and blue lightsabers flashed, screaming as they made contact. The snow around them lit up in the afterglow of their dance of death. They parried and struck, each of them fighting for their pride as well as their lives. Around them, the wind shifted drastically, the cold northern that had been promised rolling in.

The storm was here, and it was too late to turn back. Rey realized with a start that she could not lose. If she lost, she would die. No one would come for her.

She fought hard, striking fast, desperate to end the fight before she wore down, but every strike she threw was parried away. Kylo Ren was stronger than her, and she was wearing down far too quickly. He was gaining the upper hand.

She lashed out, kicking him squarely in the hip. He stumbled back ungracefully, thrown by her physical attack. Rey used the opportunity and slashed her lightsaber at him while he was stunned. He blocked her attack in time, but the blue blade hissed a mere inch from his face, threatening to give him yet another permanent scar.

Kylo Ren shoved his red saber hard in her direction, and before she knew it the tables were turned, his blade close enough to singe her hair.

"That was a cheap shot," he grunted. "I thought you were better than that."

Rey pushed with all her might, throwing his blade back, and struck at him again. Every strike she made was blocked and returned with fervor, and she soon found that their dance had brought them down into a ravine next to a frozen lake.

She seized her chance, dashing out onto the ice, trying to put some distance between her and her adversary. She was counting on him giving up and letting her go, but she was surprised to see that he wasn't afraid to follow her.

Kylo Ren moved out onto the ice with a lithe grace obtained from years of battle training. She met him with another strike, which he easily blocked.

"Stop it Rey," he commanded her, but she was in no mood to obey.

She thought of Poe, who had been tortured at his hands. She thought of Finn, who had almost died fighting him. She thought of all the Jedi Padawan he had slaughtered, and last of all she thought of Han Solo. Han Solo, his _father_ , whom he had driven his lightsaber through like it was nothing. She would not stop until this animal was brought to justice.

Rey slashed again, barely missing him, and chipped the ice between them with the edge of her lightsaber.

 _Rey, stop it!_ His thoughts projected to her. _The ice is unstable. You're going to get us both killed._

She slashed at him again and he blocked, pushing her back.

She misstepped.

Suddenly, Rey felt the ice give way beneath her, and she plunged into the frigid waters. Growing up on Jakku had its disadvantages, one being that she couldn't swim. She knew as soon as she hit the water that she was going to drown.

The last thing she saw was Ren's face full of shock and terror, before she slipped under and let the darkness take her.

" _Rey, what are you doing? You have to take off! Now!" the voice of Poe Dameron sounded out over the comm system of the Millennium Falcon._

 _In the co-pilot's seat next to her, Chewbacca roared out something similar. Starkiller Base was imploding. They needed to leave immediately, and yet she paused, unable to take off._

 _She could still see_ him _at the edge of her vision. From here, he was nothing more than a dark spot, buried in the snow. An injured Kylo Ren, who was soon to become a deceased Kylo Ren._

 _Rey lingered on the thought for too long, and her decision was made for her. She was committed, regardless of the fact that she would probably hate herself for it later._

" _We have to get him," she told Chewie. "We can't leave him to die."_

 _The wookie was starting to argue, but Rey was already moving the Falcon towards him._

" _Yes Chewie, I remember that he killed Han," she answered to the wookie's outrage. "General Organa will still want him alive though."_

 _At that, Chewbacca stopped arguing, knowing that she was right. Rey set the Falcon on autopilot, programming it to hover until they returned, and she and Chewie disembarked._

 _As they approached Kylo Ren, Rey pushed the force towards him, causing him to black out. He never fought her, and Rey briefly wondered if his spirit was as broken as his body looked after their fight._

 _Chewbacca easily lifted him, throwing him haphazardly over his hairy shoulders, and the two of the hightailed it back to the Millennium Falcon as the ground below them started to give way._

 _It was close, too close._

 _Rey lifted off right as the planet collapsed beneath them. In the background Poe Dameron was still advising them to take off._

" _Millennium Falcon to Resistance. We are taking off, en route to base. Inform General Organa that we have Kylo Ren in custody. Over."_

 _She heard a whoop on the other end of the comm system as she warped the Falcon to light speed. Behind them, Starkiller Base exploded, fragmenting into a million pieces and scattering across the galaxy._

 _The Millennium Falcon shook violently from the explosion, jarring Rey so hard she saw stars. Chewbacca let out an indignant roar and they both held on until the impact subsided. Rey let out a whoop of victory as they left Starkiller Base's gravitational pull. She high-fived Chewie, grinning from ear to ear._

" _Millennium Falcon to Resistance," she broadcasted. "We are free and clear. Headed to base. Over."_

" _Damn that was close!" Poe answered. "We all know you can fly now, so next time don't wait until the last second to take off or we'll lose all our fighters from heart attacks."_

 _Rey laughed, feeling giddy. "Can't make any promises," she teased._

" _Show off," Poe shot back lightly._

" _We'll see you at base. Millennium Falcon over and out."_

 _Rey set the Falcon to autopilot, typing in the coordinates to Hoth. When she was satisfied that the ship was taking over, she unstrapped herself to check on Finn and Kylo Ren._

 _She had every intention of checking on Finn first, and saving a last glance at their extra passenger, but she found herself going to him first. Something in the Force drew her to him, it had ever since he went into her mind and she into his. It was an unexplainable pull, that she neither liked nor wanted, but it was there all the same._

 _Rey should never have brought him on board, she knew that. Kylo Ren should be dead, with tiny little pieces of his former existence floating in the galaxy along with the remains of Starkiller Base. But instead, he was here, in the Millennium Falcon, because Rey couldn't bear to leave him behind._

" _What's happening to me?" she whispered, as if the unconscious Ren would answer her._

 _Suddenly, her lungs felt as though they were on fire, and her body was cold. Somewhere she smelled smoke, and heard a strange howling noise. She looked at Kylo Ren, but he was already fading away, leaving her alone in the darkness. Somehow, the thought of him leaving her terrified Rey, and she reached out for him, but he was already gone._

Rey awoke to the sound of howling wind and the smell of fire. Her lungs burned, and every breath was painful. She opened her eyes slowly, trying to clear her head.

She was in some kind of cave.

Outside a blizzard raged with fierce intensity, but it didn't go any further than the entrance of her sanctuary. She took note of the fact that she lay on the ground no more than four or five feet from a small fire.

Across from the fire sat a very cold, tired, and miserable looking Kylo Ren. He was wearing a pair of black pants with a wide black belt and tall black boots, but form the waist up he was stripped. His broad chest flexed as he stoked up the fire with his lightsaber.

For a moment, Rey merely took him in, the sight of him without his mask and heavy black clothing strange. He was handsome, of that she was certain. Even the scar that ran across his face did little to take away from that. His dark curls framed his face, and his eyes were a deep chocolate. His lips were full, and pouted in a very seductive way when he concentrated. He was tall and lean, his body built for graceful fighting and his stature intimidating.

Rey briefly thought that if she didn't hate him so much, she might pursue him. However, that thought was quickly replaced by a more logical one.

 _Why was he stripped from the waist up in the middle of a blizzard?_

When the answer came to her, she felt both foolish and violated. With a start she realized that he didn't have any clothes on because _she_ was wearing them. His black long-sleeve shirt covered her torso and upper thighs, and she was wrapped from head to toe in his thick, black cloak.

Rey jumped up in shock and rage. Her cheeks burned in rage as she realized what must have happened.

"You!" she shouted, trying hard to keep the tremors from her voice. "You undressed me! How dare you!"

Kylo Ren looked at her with amusement in his dark eyes, his mouth curving up into a smirk.

"Would you have preferred if I let you freeze to death?"

The rational part of Rey's mind told her that he was right, but she was too ashamed to admit it.

"You have no right!" she continued. "You saw me naked! You…You're a sick pervert!"

Kylo Ren was openly laughing now, the sound rich and deep. "Yes, I took your clothes off so you wouldn't freeze to death. Yes, I saw you naked. In case you were wondering, I enjoyed the view; and although I don't consider myself a pervert, you can call me one if it makes you feel better."

"You're such a jerk!" she shouted at him.

She wrapped his cloak more tightly around her body, as if covering herself now could erase what he had seen. She tried to force push him, to show him exactly what she thought about him, but he barely even moved back.

"Sit down before you hurt yourself," he commanded her, chuckling at her meager efforts to harm him. "You're too weak to fight right now."

Rey glared at him, feeling dizzy from her effort to force push him.

"I'm sitting down because I want to, not because you told me to," she clarified as she slipped back to the ground.

"Alright," he smirked, his eyes gleaming with amusement.

She hated him. She hated everything about him. She hated his smug demeanor. She hated his force abilities. She hated that he could get inside her head. She even hated his good looks. Someone as evil as him shouldn't be as handsome as he was. She let her eyes linger for a moment too long, and he smirked at her once again.

"Like what you see?" he asked nonchalantly.

Rey could feel her face going hot. "Shut up," she quipped. "All of this is your fault."

"My fault?" he asked smugly. "I seem to remember that you were the one who followed me."

"I wouldn't have followed you if you hadn't run!"

"And I wouldn't have ran if your Resistance friends hadn't decided to take my head. They didn't tell you did they?" he asked when he saw her face go slack. "Your buddy Poe told me last night that I would never receive a fair trail. He told me that by the next sundown they intended to take my head and send it to Snoke in a box. The Resistance is not as united or as kind as they seem."

"I won't say you don't deserve it," Rey replied carefully. "But I didn't know."

Kylo Ren seemed to take no offense to her reply. "It's not like it matters. I escaped, and they won't follow me in this storm. That would be suicide. We've also already established that you're going to let me go, so things are looking up."

"Why would I let you go after everything you've done," Rey snapped, angry once again.

"Because a deal is a deal," Ren drawled slowly. "I believe you said that if you lost our little fight that you would let me go. Time to hold up your end of the bargain."

Rey frowned at him, her anger beginning to subside. "I would have won if it hadn't been for the ice."

Kylo Ren snorted in disbelief. "Blame the ice all you like, but you and I both know you would have lost anyway." _I can read your thoughts, remember? You knew that you were wearing down. The victory was mine from the beginning._

"I hate you," she responded quickly, but there was no real venom in her words.

"I'd be insulted if you didn't."

"Why did you save me?" she asked suddenly. "Why didn't you let me drown or freeze to death?"

Kylo Ren walked over to where she sat and lowered himself to the ground directly in front of her. He was now less than a foot away, his dark eyes meeting hers with an intensity that she wasn't used to. Up close his scar was far more prominent, the smooth pink flesh marring his face. For a moment, Rey felt a pang of guilt for giving it to him.

"You saved me on Starkiller Base, so I saved you on the ice. Now we're even."

She sensed there was more to it, and she was right. He bit his bottom lip gently and looked away from her, unable to continue. Instead, she felt his thoughts as he pushed them to her.

 _I saved you because we have a connection. Ever since the interrogation room, I can read your thoughts, see into your mind. I can feel your emotions, your presence, and if I concentrate hard enough, I can even feel the beat of your heart._

 _I know you can feel me too, even if you won't admit it. We travel different paths, but we are one and the same, you and I. You are the light and I am the darkness, but we are the same. I was unable to bear the thought of your life being snuffed out, so I saved you._

"No," she protested, panic rising up in her.

 _Yes_ his thoughts pushed to her again. _That's why you volunteered to bring me back too. You feel me as strongly as I feel you. You don't understand it, and it confuses you. You want to know why._

"Stop it," she warned, eyes filled with panic.

 _We're connected Rey, deeply connected through the Force. Our fates are entwined._

"No."

 _Speak to me with your mind._

 _No!_

Rey shoved him hard with the Force, knocking him on his back. "We are _not_ the same."

She jumped up from where she was sitting, desperate to get away from him. He let her go as she walked to the back of the cave, trying to put some distance between them, but even with the distance Rey could still feel his thoughts, and the strong, steady beat of Ren's heart.

He watched her as she tried to sleep, noting that she was failing miserably. Even with his shirt and cloak, she was freezing. Her teeth chattered and she shook violently. She was from Jakku, a planet known for heat and sand, and it was obvious that the cold of Hoth did not agree with her.

Ren was cold too, having long ago lost the feeling in his upper body.

"Rey," he called to her gently. She barely looked at him, the effort taking too much energy.

"It's too cold to hate each other right now," he said bluntly. "If you want to survive the night, were going to have to do something different, and you're not going to like it."

"What?" she asked immediately. "I'm so cold, I'll do anything."

Kylo Ren sighed deeply, steeling himself for rejection and a slow death from the cold. "We need to huddle together for body heat."

"No," was Rey's immediate response. "I'd rather die than get that close to you."

He sighed again in defeat. "We're going to die then, just so you know. It's too cold, even with the fire and the shelter."

He sat shivering for a little while longer. It seemed like hours, but in reality it was only a few minutes before Rey rose from her spot and reluctantly stalked over to him.

"For the record, I'm doing this because I think it's a good idea, not because you want to."

Ren smirked at her, amused by her stubbornness. "Whatever you say, sweetheart."

"Call me sweetheart one more time and I'll punch you in the face."

He laughed openly then, surprised by how natural it felt to joke with her. Ren wrapped his arms around her gently and pulled her to him. Rey looked as though she wanted to bolt from his touch, but she allowed him to pull her to his chest.

They lay down together by the fire and Kylo Ren took his cloak from her and wrapped it around both of them, pulling her into him once again. She stiffened as he wrapped his arms tightly around her.

Her body felt fantastic. Her skin was soft and warm, sending a jolt of electricity through him. Her hazel eyes met his, and plump lips parted seductively as she tried to control her breathing. He could feel her breasts against his chest through the shirt she was wearing and he almost lost control.

He thought of the most disturbing thing he could think of to keep himself from getting an erection. General Hux in a speedo. It worked. Instant turn off.

He rejoiced internally until he felt her discomfort and read her thoughts. They were not thoughts that pleased him.

"I'm not going to rape you," he growled, answering her fears out loud. "I may be a lot of unsavory things, but a rapist is not one of them. If I take you, it's going to be because you want it."

"I'll never want you," she spat. "Keep dreaming."

"I will," he answered her gently, not a hint of malice in his voice. He briefly caught the look of surprise in her eyes, along with another emotion of a more primal nature.

She wanted him almost as badly as he wanted her. He could see it in her eyes, but she was unwilling to admit it to herself yet.

That was fine. Kylo Ren could be patient on occasion. She would ask him to take her eventually, of that he was certain.

They lay quiet for some time, each of them warming up against the other. Finally, he felt Rey relax against him, her breathing evening out.

When he knew she was asleep, he allowed himself to think about her. He thought about earlier in the day, how he had dived into the ice to save her. His entire body had felt as though it was on fire as he pulled her from the ice hole. She wasn't breathing when he pulled her out, so he had alternated chest compressions and artificial respiration, trying to save her.

He remembered the way her lips had tasted sweet against his own, and he had found himself lingering far longer than necessary. Then of course, there was her body. Perfect in every way. When he had taken her clothes off to keep her warm, his eyes could not focus on anything but the perfection before him. He had dressed her quickly for fear of losing control, but he longed to touch her and to feel her body against his.

The memory of her body aroused him, and Ren was thankful that Rey had already gone to sleep so he didn't have to force himself to think of General Hux again.

Her hair that was usually up tightly in triple buns was messy, and Ren found himself involuntarily brushing a stray hair behind her ear as she slept.

He wanted her more than anything, and he would have her. He just needed to be patient. It would take some time for Rey to admit that she wanted him too, but eventually she would. When she finally asked him to take her, he fully intended to claim her as his.

 **Well that was the first chapter! Hope you guys enjoyed it! I will try to update fairly soon, but I have a full time job, run a ranch, and have a baby to care for, so forgive me if it takes me a little while. This will probably be a fairly short story due to time constraints, but I intend to make every chapter count. No fillers here. Anyways, if you enjoyed the story, leave me some comments! I love hearing from you!**

 **Until next time!**


	2. Cat and Mouse

**Hello good people of fanfiction! I hope you are all having an awesome week! I was able to finish this a little quicker than I thought, and it's a little longer than intended as well. Sometimes when I start writing the plot gets out of hand and I'm powerless to stop the madness… All I can do is go with it, and that's exactly what happened with this chapter! So if you're concerned with the size of this chapter, I promise to be gentle ; ) haha**

 **I would like to take a minute to shout out to Thatgirl, JuliaAurelia, ShannonSolo, , alpha wolfstar, PhantomSometimesWrites, Voorpret, MissusGages, Sophlove, fanficaddict14, and the unnamed guests for reviewing this story! You guys are the best, and I'm so glad that you're enjoying the story so far! Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedules to tell me what you think! Your comments are appreciated and inspire me to write faster! ; ) Also, I would like to thank everyone who has clicked follow or favorite for this story! I have received far more support than I ever imagined, and I hope that I can do justice to the characters and give you a story that you will be pleased with!**

 **Disclaimer: I forgot to post in the first chapter, but obviously I don't own Star Wars or any of the characters in this story. (rolls eyes) I wish I did, but I don't. I'm not making any money off of this. I'm writing, because I enjoy it. Now back to the story!**

Chapter 2: Cat and Mouse

"You did what?" Leia all but shouted at him.

Before her stood a very nervous Poe Dameron, an angry Finn, and C-3PO. They had come into the officer's strategy room while she was meeting with some of the members of the Resistance concerning First Order strikes. They had demanded to speak with her immediately, and she had only agreed because Finn said it had something to do with Ben and Rey. Now they stood in her private quarters, and she wanted nothing more than to murder them.

"Tell General Organa what you told me," Finn prompted Poe.

Poe looked hesitant at first; his eyes darting from Finn to her, and then back to Finn. Leia cleared her throat loudly, in no mood to play games. Poe shuffled back and forth on his feet and finally spoke.

"I told Kylo Ren that he would never get a fair trial," he admitted reluctantly. "I told him that we were going to cut off his head and send it in a box to Snoke for all the trouble he's caused us."

"And that's why he ran," Finn added angrily. "And that's why Rey's out there right now, probably already dead or freezing to death-"

"Enough!" Leia interrupted. "Can we get someone out there to look for them right now?"

"Not at this time," Poe said ruefully. "The storm doesn't look like it's going to die down for a few more days."

"By my calculations, the odds of surviving a week in a blizzard on Hoth are approximately three-hundred seventy nine to one-"

"Shut up Threepio!" the other three shouted in unison.

"I told you bringing him was a bad idea!" Finn scolded.

"Enough!" Leia intervened. "I don't need to know the odds of my son already being dead, or Rey for that matter either. And the droid is already here, so that's one mistake you can't undo. Finn, you were on damage control for all of this. Tell me, what supplies did Ben take with him when he left?"

"He took some food from the kitchens, tauntaun meat, bread, things like that. He took some clothes, some kindling for fire, his cloak, and his lightsaber," he rattled off. "Rey took nothing but her lightsaber. She thought she was coming right back." He frowned then, unable to accept her possible loss.

"I'm sorry Finn," Leia addressed him. "I know you care about Rey and I intend to get her back to us as soon as I can."

"Why did you let her go in the first place?" he accused quietly.

Leia observed the former stormtrooper for a moment, taking him in. His brow was creased with worry and dark skin more pale than usual. It was obvious he had not slept in days. He wore a Resistance issued flight suit that covered him from the neck down, but even with the suit he still carried visible reminders of his fight with Ben. He had scars now, more scars than she cared to count, and he walked with a slight limp. He had recovered, but he was still suffering in many ways. He was strong, a good fighter, and an even better man, and Leia respected the hell out of him.

"I didn't want to let her go," she told him truthfully. "But do you really think I could have stopped her?"

"No," Finn admitted immediately. "Rey does what she wants. I'm sorry for blaming you. I just hate the thought of her out there all alone."

"I know you do, so let's focus on what we can do to help her. When is the soonest that we can get a team out there to find them?"

"Three days maybe," Poe answered. "I need to get supplies together and find some people that are willing to go."

"Count me in," Finn volunteered.

"If I may interrupt, the odds of-"

"Shut up Threepio!"

"Do it," Leia commanded. "This is your fault and you're going to fix it.

Poe nodded briefly, thankful that the meeting had not gone as badly as he had expected.

"Finn and Threepio, you're dismissed. Poe, you stay for a minute."

She waited until the others left before she turned on Poe and unleashed her anger.

"I was working with him," she hissed. "I was making some progress and then you go and do _this_. He is entitled to a fair trial, whether you believe he deserves one or not. This is a democracy, not a dictatorship! It's the only thing that sets us apart from the First Order! If we just punished everyone as we saw fit without a fair trial, how are we any better than they are? We have to better. The galaxy needs us to be better. And if you _ever_ undermine my authority again, I'll tear you apart, do you understand?"

"Yes ma'am," was Poe's singular reply.

"Good. Now get out of my sight."

As soon as he left, Leia found herself pulling out a bottle of whisky from the place she hid it in her quarters. She poured herself a glass and settled down in preparation for what would no doubt be another sleepless night.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey sat perfectly still next to the fire, watching the blizzard rage outside.

The last few days had been strange to say the least, although not necessarily a bad sort of strange. She and Kylo Ren had fallen into a rhythm that worked for them. In the mornings, they would eat some of the rations Ren had brought with him from the base.

They would play games to make the time go by, and tell stories from their childhood. Kylo Ren's memories were usually amusing and involved him getting into some sort of trouble; while Rey's were more about the days she was able to accomplish certain goals on Jakku.

At night, they would eat some more of the rations and then they would sleep together under his cloak for warmth. It was a strange sort of normal, but she was beginning to become accustomed to his constant companionship.

As Rey watched the storm, she cuddled up in his cloak, enjoying the warmth it provided. Kylo Ren sat next to her, his gaze traveling between the blizzard outside and her.

"First crush," he inquired casually, offering her a piece of dried tauntaun meat that he had confiscated from the kitchens on the Resistance base.

Rey took the meat and chewed it thoughtfully as she watched the snow fall.

"His name was Ragnar," she finally answered. "I was trading some scrap metal for rations and one of the bosses on Jakku tried to cheat me. Ragnar stepped in and threatened the junk boss with the most wicked-looking knife I've ever seen. He was so scared of Ragnar he shit himself."

She began laughing as the memory came back to her. "The junk boss gave me twice as many rations as he should have, and even threw in some clean material for clothes."

"So you liked this Ragnar guy because he stood up for you?" Ren asked casually.

"That, and he was very handsome," Rey threw in, turning to grin at him mischievously.

"Ah… but was he as good looking as me?"

"WAY better looking," she teased, rolling her eyes.

"What happened to him?" Kylo Ren asked, genuinely curious.

"He left Jakku the next day. Turns out he was a smuggler of some sort. I kept hoping that he would come back and I would get to see him again, but he never did. Your turn. First crush," she said quickly, turning the tables on him.

"Her name was Misha," he began slowly, thinking back to her. "She had the most fantastic tits and ass you could ever think of. She was from Alderaan. Wanted to be a model."

Rey snorted in amusement. "Tits and ass? Is that all you care about?"

"I was fifteen, Rey," he shrugged. "I'm pretty sure all horny fifteen year old boys care about tits and ass."

"Okay," Rey rolled her eyes. "What happened to her?"

"Well, her face never moved much. It was always stuck in this perpetual smug kind of look. Anyways, turns out she was getting these injections in her face to make it look that way on purpose. Some weird poison stuff they get from a fish that puffs up somewhere in the Milky Way Galaxy. Weird science fiction shit like you'd see in a horror movie."

"Okay…"

"Anyways," he continued. "She got a few too many injections and the poison paralyzed her and caused her heart to stop."

"Wow," Rey commented, taking another proffered strip of tauntaun meat from him.

"Yeah it was crazy, I kept the pictures she sent me though, and sometimes when the mood was right I would-"

"Eww! Gross! Stop!" she interrupted him. "I don't want to hear about how you pleasured yourself to her photos."

Rey could feel her cheeks going hot. She couldn't explain it, but something about Ren getting off on this girl's photos bothered her.

"Do I detect some jealousy?" Kylo Ren asked innocently.

"No… No!" she protested. "You wish. I couldn't care less about what you get off on."

"Oh do you?" he smirked. "I think it bothers you that I used to get off on some other girl."

Rey couldn't stop herself. She reached out and hit him hard on the shoulder. "Jerk." She pulled back to hit him again, but he caught her fist in his own.

Before Rey knew what was happening, Kylo Ren had her pinned to the ground, holding her wrists above her head. His grip was firm, but not painful, and he hovered over her, bringing his face a mere inch from hers.

He was so close that she could feel his warm breath on her skin. She could feel all of him again, and this time she didn't fight it. Rey could feel the way his heart hammered in his chest, and the way his usually steady breath was coming in hitched and ragged gasps. It was as though he was trying to control himself and failing miserably. His eyes shone with a feral hunger, and his hands shook as he held her down.

"I want you Rey," he admitted shakily.

At the sound of her name on his lips, and his confession of want, Rey could feel her own heart begin to race, and the place between her legs go wet.

"I want you more than anything I've ever wanted in my entire life." _Please let me kiss you_ he finished with his mind. _I want to know what it feels like. I want to taste you. I want to claim you. I want to make you mine._

Rey could feel him hard against her, and it only served to make her even more wet.

She should have said no. She should have never let him touch her, but instead she found herself nodding breathlessly. Kylo Ren closed the distance between him, capturing her lips with his.

It was indescribable, the feeling stealing all of her. She was everything and nothing all at the same time. The only thing that mattered in that moment was the feel of his lips on hers.

The Force bond between them was strong, only intensifying with their kiss. Rey could see him, all of him. The good, the bad, and the ugly played before her. She saw a young Ben Solo, playing pranks on his friends. She saw Kylo Ren, putting his mask on for the very first time. She saw his rage as he murdered his own father, and she felt the desperate need that he carried for her. Rey knew that Ren could see all of her as well, and strangely that thought didn't bother her nearly as much as it should have.

Their thoughts and memories jumbled together, leaving them only with a beautiful picture of the here and now.

Kylo Ren deepened the kiss, his tongue ravaging her mouth with a desperate need that she found herself matching. In that moment, she wanted him as badly as he wanted her.

Rey freed her hands from his grasp, and tangled them into his dark curls. Ren moaned into her mouth as she brushed a delicate finger across his jaw. He rubbed his harness against her, and Rey could feel herself beginning to lose control. She knew where their actions would lead if this continued for much longer.

Ren came up for air, momentarily breaking the kiss, and Rey found herself becoming exceptionally brave with him.

"You can tell Misha to go kick rocks," she grinned breathlessly.

Kylo Ren laughed deeply, his handsome face made even more beautiful by a wide grin that replaced his trademark smirk.

"If she wasn't dead, I'd be sure to let her know you're better," he winked slyly. "That was… incredible…"

Suddenly, a loud noise that somewhere between a scream and a roar sounded out. Kylo Ren sat straight up, dark eyes wide with surprise.

"What was that?" he asked.

Rey could feel the hair on the back of her neck stand up, all thoughts of their previous intimacy forgotten for the moment. "I don't know," she replied honestly.

Rey had heard stories of wild creatures that inhabited Hoth, and none of them sounded very friendly.

The two of them agreed that they should stay on guard all night. When Rey could barely keep her eyes open, Ren wrapped her up with him in his cloak as he had done for the last several nights.

Truth be told, she had come to enjoy their physical contact. It made her feel vile and traitorous, as though she were letting down the only real friends she had ever known; but the long, cold nights were always better in Ren's arms.

This night was no exception. He pulled her close, and she buried her face in his chest, falling asleep almost immediately while he kept watch. Rey didn't even know anything was wrong until she felt him leave her.

Kylo Ren extracted himself from their shared blanket and summoned his lightsaber. He ignited it immediately, the crimson glow casting his face in an eerie light. His scar became more prominent as he focused, and she could sense his uncertainty through the Force.

"We're being hunted," he said simply when he felt her gaze. "Wampa."

Rey's blood instantly ran cold. Wampas were not creatures to be trifled with. They were very large and very dangerous. She sat up with a start as Kylo Ren approached the mouth of the cave, lightsaber in hand.

"You want a piece of this?" he shouted into the storm. "You want me? Come and get me you bastard!"

"Ren!" Rey shouted, but it was already too late.

She heard a screeching roar as the wampa charged. She didn't even have time to summon her lightsaber before Kylo Ren was engaged with the beast. The wampa barreled down on him, knocking him off of his feet.

Ren ran his crimson saber through the beast's shoulder, only serving to piss it off further. The wampa struck hard with its claws, knocking Kylo Ren across the ground and causing him to lose his lightsaber. The wampa swung down, intending to finish him off, but was stopped by the Force.

Kylo Ren held his hands out in front of him, his entire body shaking violently from the effort of holding the beast back. Having summoned her lightsaber, Rey ran out into the blizzard and joined the fight. She swung hard, taking the wampa by surprise and slashing it across the back.

The beast stumbled away, shaking his horns at her, and began to reassess the fight now that there were two adversaries. It snarled wildly, ready to charge again.

Rey blinked the snow from her eyes, and prepared herself for the charge, pulling her lightsaber back so she could swing quickly, but the attack never came.

A shrill scream echoed out across the landscape and the wampa gave them one last growl before taking off. Kylo Ren summoned his lightsaber and let out a primal roar.

"Fuck!" he shouted, igniting the saber and swinging at anything within reach. He struck the ground in front of him repeatedly, then he went after snowflakes, melting anything within striking distance.

"Shit!" He swung at a large rock that sat close to their cave, and then he went after their cave itself, causing a few pieces of rock to fall from the entrance.

Rey shot the Force at him, knocking the lightsaber from his hands. He stared at he openmouthed in the snow, his face contorted in rage.

"Are you done now?" Rey growled. "You almost destroyed our shelter and you're acting like a child!"

"No, I'm not done!" he shouted at her. "You have to kill those things, Rey! If you don't kill them, they come back and kill you!"

Rey thought about pushing the Force at him to keep him still, or maybe even put him on the ground. She was certainly angry enough with him, but she knew that one of them needed to keep a level head. Instead of attacking him, she closed the distance between them and gently put a hand on his face.

He froze instantly at her touch. She ran her fingers slowly over his jawline and watched as all of his rage melted away, leaving only a hungry longing in its place. He leaned his face into her touch and closed his eyes. Beneath her hand, the Force between them pulsed wildly. She could feel him again with every touch, and each time only served to leave her more breathless and intoxicated than the last.

"We'll figure it out," she told him gently. "It's going to be okay."

His dark eyes fluttered open and met hers with such a softness that Rey felt her breath hitch in her chest.

"We should go back in the cave," he finally said. "You look like you're freezing and I need to cauterize my wound before I bleed to death."

She was freezing. The cold wind and the snow were chilling her to the bone, and he wasn't exaggerating about his wounds either. His shirt was torn at the shoulder where the wampa had clawed him and a dark pool of blood was beginning to color the snow beneath his feet. Reluctantly, she took her hand away from his face. Ren retrieved his lightsaber, and the two of them went back inside.

Rey stripped Kylo Ren of his black long-sleeve shirt by the fire, and began to treat his wounds without being asked.

It was bad. The wampa's claws had dug deep into the flesh of his shoulder and left him bleeding profusely. Rey melted some snow over the fire to clean the wound, and she used the very tip of her lightsaber to cauterize it.

It smelled like burning flesh. She gagged, but managed to hold in what meager rations she had eaten. She could tell from the way Kylo Ren grimaced that the process was very painful, but to his credit he never cried out. When she finished his shoulder looked ugly and charred, but the bleeding had stopped.

She thought about how easy it would be to kill him in that moment, his back turned to her, trusting her to tend to his wounds with her lightsaber. She knew instinctively that she _should_ kill him for everything he had done. If she rid the galaxy of Kylo Ren, she would no doubt be hailed as a hero. But that wasn't what she wanted.

Rey's hands shook as she helped him pull his shirt back on. She realized for the first time that she didn't want him to die, and she would be terribly upset if something happened to him. _When had their relationship shifted from enemies to allies?_

It had happened sometime over the last few days, but she couldn't pinpoint when exactly. All the time they had spent together blurred into one long memory, and her feelings for him just _were_. There was nothing else to say about it.

"I'm going out tomorrow. I'll track the wampa and I'll kill it so it never comes back here."

It took Rey a moment to realize that Ren was speaking to her. "What?" she gaped.

"I'm going to hunt the wampa as soon as it gets light enough to follow a blood trail. I'm going to find it and kill it so it won't come back here."

"Absolutely not," Rey shut him down immediately. "First, there's a blizzard out there, so you'll either get lost and won't be able to find your way back, or you'll freeze to death."

She shot him a glare when he looked as though he might interrupt. "And assuming you don't freeze to death or get lost, you're still wounded and in no shape to take on a wampa. If you leave tomorrow, you won't be coming back."

"Then you win either way," he said simply. "If I come back, you're safe from that wampa, and if I don't you're rid of me with no need to feel bad about it. You can have all of my provisions, and when the storm dies down you can go right back to the Resistance. Consider it payback for my sins if it helps you sleep at night."

"I don't want you to die," Rey whispered. It was barely audible, but she could tell by the shocked expression on his face that he had heard her.

"You don't want me to die huh?" he asked smugly, cocking a brow in her direction. "I thought you hated me. What changed your mind? Was it my incredibly good looks and perfect physique?"

"Shut up," Rey snorted. "You're not that pretty, and I still kind of hate you. It's just not as much as I did."

"Would it put your mind at ease if I promise you that I'll come back?" he inquired, all humor gone from his voice.

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Kylo Ren," she warned him.

He closed the distance between them in seconds, taking her face in his hands and tilting her chin gently so he could look in her eyes.

"I promise you Rey, that I will come back for you. Nothing, not even death, will keep me from finding you again."

He kissed her gently on the forehead, the feel of his lips sending electricity through her. Rey said nothing, for there was nothing to say. He was a fool, and she as well for wanting him. She knew as certainly as she knew that the sun set in west that his promise to her would be broken. He would never come back.

As he held her that night and they drifted off to sleep, Rey knew that it would be their last night together. He would never hold her again and she would never see him again.

When she awoke the next morning, wrapped up in his cloak and alone, it was like she was the little girl on Jakku again, waiting for someone who would never come back.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

General Hux grunted with each thrust, his naked body covered in sweat from hours of "activities." He could feel himself climaxing, and he pulled out as he finished on her back.

"Brienne," he mumbled tiredly.

"No first names, remember?" Captain Phasma reminded him breathlessly, as she sat up in his bed. Her short, blond hair was tousled every which way, and her cheeks held a rosy glow. "I thought we decided that we didn't want to get too familiar in case one of us gets transferred."

"You're right," Hux agreed. "My mistake." His handheld communicator chimed, indicating an incoming call.

"Damn it!" he cursed. "Can't get a moments peace."

He pulled on a t-shirt and a pair of regulation First Order pants before crossing his quarters to take the call.

"Hux here," he greeted, pressing the button to activate the hologram.

The tall, lean form of Supreme Leader Snoke filled the space in front of him.

"General Hux," Snoke greeted slowly. "You look…well."

Hux pushed his tousled red hair back in place and wiped the sweat from his brow, attempting to make himself look more presentable.

"Supreme Leader. I wasn't expecting to hear from you this soon. We won't have the new stormtrooper unit ready for inspection until next week."

"I'm aware of that," Snoke responded, his voice revealing his annoyance. "That is not what I want to talk about. An informant of mine has found the Resistance home base."

At this Hux's brows shot up. "Oh really?"

"Yes… It would seem that General Organa and her Resistance fighters are taking refuge on Hoth."

"I will prepare a team and take them out immediately, Supreme Leader," Hux promised.

"That's not all General. Ren is there."

Hux froze, only his eyes betraying his disappointment. "Kylo Ren is alive?"

"Yes General. It would seem that even though you failed to retrieve him on Starkiller Base, he is still alive. I want him back. Your orders are to retrieve him and destroy the Resistance base, in that order. If you fail to retrieve Ren, don't bother coming back. Am I clear?"

"Yes sir," Hux spat out. The call was terminated, leaving Hux alone with a curious Captain Phasma.

"Why do you hate him so much?" she asked curiously, as she stretched her naked body out across his bed.

He didn't have to ask who she was talking about. It was obvious.

"Because he's a petulant child who gets whatever he wants. All he has to do is throw a tantrum and everyone jumps through hoops to please him."

"So?" Phasma interjected. "Who cares? He'll self-destruct one of these days and no one will care that he's gone. You have your own platoon of stormtroopers. They trust you and they respect you. Kylo Ren rules by fear, not trust. In the end, Snoke will realize how valuable you are, just give it some time. In the meantime, try not to fight with him like you two are children. Jealousy's not becoming on you Hux."

"Is that so?" he questioned.

"Yes, but you know what is becoming on you?"

He raised his brows and Phasma grinned devilishly.

"Me."

At that he could no longer control himself, and before he knew it he was naked in the bed once again, ready to forget all about Kylo Ren in senseless debauchery.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kylo Ren fought through the blizzard, moving quickly to keep his body heat up. He had been following the wampa's blood trail and tracks for the last several hours and he was getting close.

Leaving Rey this morning was one of the most difficult things he had ever done. She was beautiful and he wanted her more than anything he had ever wanted in his entire life. He hated the thought that he might not get to have her.

He hadn't been truthful with her, he knew that. He didn't know if he was going to make it back to her or not, but he was going to do everything in his power to keep his promise. Live or die, he had to do what he could to protect her.

Ren wasn't sure why he cared so much about Rey, but he did. The kiss they had shared enraptured him. He had never experienced anything like it, and even now he could still taste her on his lips. He wanted more, so much more.

Kylo Ren suddenly stopped in his tracks at the sight of his quarry. The wampa he had been searching for was five feet away, consuming a tauntaun. It looked at him, and he had only seconds to react before it came barreling down on him.

He ignited his lightsaber and slashed upward as the wampa clawed at him. The beast stumbled back, roaring in pain. It was injured and moving more slowly than it had been the previous night, and he fully intended to take advantage of that.

Kylo Ren went on the attack. He struck hard and fast, moving towards the wampa, pushing it back further. He had the upper hand now. He struck once, then twice, hitting the wampa's shoulder in retaliation for his own.

His third strike was true, slitting the beast's throat. He jumped aside as the wampa fell, whooping in victory.

He had killed a wampa!

Kylo Ren was pretty sure that he was one of the few men who ever had, and he was alive! He grinned wildly at the thought of keeping his promise to Rey. He would come back for her, just like he promised.

He spent the next several hours skinning a quartering the wampa under an outcropping of rocks. The rocks provided some coverage from the wind, allowing him to work. He packed all of the meat that he could carry in a pack he made from part of the hide.

The rest he fleshed with a rock, intending to use it as a sort of coat. It would be dark before he could make it back to the cave, and he would need the extra warmth to survive. The wind and snow had already chilled him to the bone. Perhaps when he left Hoth he could properly tan the hide, but for now fleshing it would be good enough.

The meat he took was intended to keep him and Rey fed through the rest of the storm. If they could eat and stay warm, they could survive. When he was finished he left with his provisions and new wampa coat, grinning like an idiot, and went back in the direction he came from.

Darkness began to fall as he traveled, and the temperature dropped drastically, but still he trudged onward. He felt for Rey through the Force, and used her to guide himself in the right direction. He briefly found himself wondering if Rey was worried about him, but decided not to get his hopes up.

Somewhere in the darkness ahead another wampa's shrill cry rang out, reminding Kylo Ren that he wasn't quite as alone as he felt.

The last of the light disappeared, leaving him trudging on in the dark snowfall. He wrapped his wampa hide tightly around him, keeping in his body heat and focused on Rey's signature. She was light, she was warmth, and she was home. The thought of her gave him the strength to keep going, even as his body was wearing down.

Suddenly, her Force signature changed ever so slightly, and he could sense panic and fear coming from her in waves He had already started running when he heard her reach out to him through the Force.

 _Ren, If you're alive please come back. I need you._

Kylo Ren ran as fast as he could, fighting the knee-deep snow and the cold wind. His wampa hide was the only thing keeping him from freezing to death as he moved. He was running, but it still didn't feel fast enough. Rey needed him, and here he was playing in the damn snow.

It felt like hours, but in reality it didn't take him very long to make it back. When he arrived, it was instantly obvious why Rey had called out to him. There was another wampa at the cave.

Rey was engaging the beast in guerrilla warfare. She would strike and then hide behind the rock that Kylo Ren had tried to destroy only the night before, slowly trying to chip away at her adversary without sustaining damage. She wasn't making much progress. The quick strikes were only serving to piss the wampa off, and she was never going to be able to strike a final blow that way.

He immediately tried to assess if she was injured, but he couldn't see in the dark. He only hoped that he had arrived in enough time to help her. Without another thought, Ren ignited his lightsaber and charged into the fight, slashing at the wampa with a fierce rage.

He cut it deeply on the back, gaining its attention and causing the best to turn on him. Rey came out from behind the rock, ready to strike a blow, when Kylo Ren suddenly had an idea.

"Rey!" he shouted as he deactivated his lightsaber and threw it at her. He sent his thoughts to her, hoping she would understand, and dodged out of the way as the wampa tried to impale him with its horns.

Rey caught his lightsaber with her free hand and ignited it. The glow from the red and blue blades lit up her face and she grinned.

"Anytime now Rey!" Ren shouted as he tried to keep away from the snarling beast.

Rey jumped into action, leaping onto the back of the wampa. She crossed their lightsabers at the throat of the beast and pulled back hard. The wampa let out a shrill scream as Rey cut it's throat in one swift motion. The dying wampa toppled backwards and Kylo Ren had only a second to take action.

He moved faster than he knew he was capable of and jumped for Rey as she fell. He hit her straight on, and his momentum carried them forward. They landed with a thump, and slid through the snow as the wampa fell where they had been only milliseconds before.

They lay there for a moment, too stunned to move, and panting heavily. Rey broke the silence by laughing. It was the best sound Kylo Ren had heard all day, and he found himself laughing along with her.

"That was fun!" she exclaimed breathlessly. "We should tag team fight wampas all the time!"

"Okay," he consented between laughs. "But let's wait a day or two. I've had my fill of wampas for awhile."

She laughed again, the sound clear and high like a bell, and then rolled over playfully until she was on top of him.

Kylo Ren could scarcely breathe. He knew he looked terrible, covered in blood from head to toe, and smelling like dead animals. To his surprise, Rey said nothing about that. The only thing she said as she hovered over him and looked into his eyes with her beautiful hazel ones was "You came back for me, Ren." Then she pressed her lips to his and nothing else mattered.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey washed the blood from his face and upper body with melted snow. It wasn't the cleanest, but it was the best she could do under the circumstances. He had been out in the cold for far too long, and it showed. His skin was red from windburn and the beginning stages of hypothermia.

He shouldn't have gone after the wampa, but he did. He killed it to keep them safe, and then he came back for her. The thought was a strange one to Rey. She had spent years waiting for her parents to fulfill their promise, wasting away on Jakku under the pretense that they would return, but they never did and they never would. Kylo Ren left to protect her, and he had come back, just like he promised.

Only days ago they were enemies, then allies, and now… what? She didn't know, but things had changed between them quite palpably since he had returned. She could feel it through the Force and even through her own body.

Ren had not spoken much at all since she had kissed him in the snow. The usual smug look on his face had been replaced by something far more confusing in nature. His dark eyes constantly followed her, never looking away, and for the first time she welcomed his gaze.

When she finished washing the blood from him she turned around wordlessly to leave, intending to sort out her feelings, but paused when she felt his hand on hers.

"Please don't go."

No snarky comments, no smug remarks. Just a simple request.

"Okay," she found herself saying as she turned back around to face him. Her heart stopped at the sight of him. He was looking at her with a fierce hunger in his eyes. He bit his bottom lip and met her gaze directly.

"I need you to say it Rey," he told her, his tone slightly pleading. "I can see it in your thoughts, but I need to _hear_ it so I know it's true."

Rey was torn. What she wanted and what she had been taught was right were now vying for control. In the end, all it took was one look at the smoldering fire that burned in his eyes, and her decision was made for her.

"I want you Ren," she confessed. "I want all of you."

He closed the distance between them then, pressing his lips against hers and pulling her into him. Rey tangled her hands in his dark curls as she kissed him with fervor. His tongue demanded entrance to her mouth and she allowed it.

Kylo Ren kissed her deeply, his tongue dueling with hers for control. He ran his hands over her body in haste, touching her everywhere. She could feel his hardness pressing against her stomach and she felt herself go wet with want for him.

Kylo Ren kissed her neck greedily, his tongue making little swirls on her skin. When he kissed her collarbone she gasped involuntarily, which seemed to send him over the edge. He reached for the hem of her shirt and growled when he realized that he had to remove her belt and sash first.

Rey gave a small laugh and helped him by removing the extra clothing. It was the one time that she wished she had kept his clothes instead of putting hers back on after they dried. After he belt and sash were moved, Kylo Ren tentatively grabbed the hem of her shirt, looking to her for approval.

She nodded and he lifted her shirt off over her head. Rey unclamped the strap on her bra, letting it fall to the ground between them. Kylo Ren's eyes roved up and down her body, and Rey suddenly became self-conscious.

"Do you… Do you like what you see?" she asked nervously.

"You're beautiful," he responded softly, running his hands over her exposed body.

She wanted to touch him, so she ran her hands down his chest, feeling the muscle there. When she reached the area where his belt lay, he groaned. She was about to pull away, when he placed his hand over hers.

"Don't stop," he commanded her. "It feels good."

So she continued, touching him gently right below the belt. He kissed her, his mouth trailing from her neck all the way down to her pants. She moaned against him as his lips and tongue worked their magic on her erect nipples.

It felt good. Really good.

She found her hands fumbling with his wide belt. He helped her remove it, then tackled his pants, extracting himself with ease. Rey could see how hard he was beneath his underwear and she couldn't resist the urge to touch him. He groaned at her touch and began pawing at her pants. She helped him remove them, and her underwear as well, fully exposing herself to him.

He growled with a feral hunger, and Rey resisted the urge to shriek when he suddenly picked her up in his arms. She held on tightly to him, pressing her chest against his as he carried her bridal style to where his wampa hide lay on the ground.

Kylo Ren lay her gently on the hide next to the fire. He removed his underwear then, exposing himself to her.

Rey stared at him for a moment, taking him in. She had never been with a man before and she was both excited and frightened at the same time. Ren seemed to sense her fear, and lay down next to her on the hide. He kissed her gently as though she were fragile.

"You've never done this before, have you?" he asked softly.

"No," she answered him, her body shaking from both cold and fear.

"We don't have to do this if you're afraid. I don't want this unless you do."

"I want this," she insisted. "I _need_ this."

"I will be gentle with you, but it's going to hurt," he told her, his voice full of a strange sort of pain.

She nodded, and he kissed her again. His mouth moved over her body, roaming over every open plain and crevasse. When he reached her hips, he urged her legs apart with his own, and when she complied he situated himself at her entrance.

Kylo Ren used his hands on her first, placing one finger inside of her, and then another. He moved slowly at first, allowing her body to adjust, then he moved a little bit faster reaching deep inside of her.

Rey had never felt anything like it in her entire life. As his fingers moved inside of her, she could feel her body reacting and becoming even more wet. It felt amazing and she wanted more.

He kept going and Rey could feel her entire body winding up, begging for release from some unseen vice. When release finally came and Rey went over the edge, she cried out, feeling her body clamp down around Ren's fingers.

He grinned as he removed them from her and moved up to kiss her lips once again. Rey was in overload, her body winding down from her orgasm. She panted, trying to catch her breath as he poised himself at her entrance.

Without another word, Kylo Ren entered her. She gasped from the pain as he filled her completely. He waited for her body to adjust before he began to slowly thrust inside of her. It was painful, but there was an edge of pleasure to the pain as well. She could feel the Force between them, melding them together as they shared thoughts and memories. In that moment, they were no longer Rey and Kylo Ren, they were something else entirely, their thoughts, memories, and bodies entwined.

Rey snaked her hands into his curls once again as he thrusted into her. Ren began to move faster, and she felt her body buck up to push into his against her will.

His breath came in short, ragged gasps as he thrusted, each thrust becoming more hurried and desperate than the last. Rey could feel herself winding up again and she moaned his name as she went over the edge.

Ren groaned tiredly as he finished, his thrusts slowing until he finally stopped. He rolled off and lay next to her catching his breath. When his heart stopped racing, he pulled Rey into him, wrapping his arms around her.

Rey didn't know how to feel about what she had done. She should feel violated and ashamed, but she didn't. She only felt alive.

She pulled Kylo Ren's cloak over the both of them, and nestled her face in the crook of his neck.

"I gave in to what I wanted without any thought of repercussions. Does that make me dark?" she asked him worriedly.

"No," Ren snorted. "It makes you human. The Jedi have an unrealistic code of ethics. Why would anyone want to live their life devoid of all emotion? To never know love, or passion, or rage. You would die before you even had the chance to live."

"So you just decided you didn't want to be a Jedi because you wanted to feel emotion."

"That was part of it, yes," he replied. "That's the beauty of our lives Rey, they're ours. You always have a choice, even if someone tells you that you don't. You can choose to obey, or to not obey, either way you're making a choice. When this is all over, if you want to go back the Resistance and train to be a Jedi, I won't stop you. That choice is yours to make. Though, I would be honored if you choose to leave Hoth with me."

He kissed her gently on the forehead, and they lay quietly for some time. Rey mulled over her options as they lay together, their bodies entwined beneath his cloak. As she finally closed her eyes to sleep, Rey knew that she had already made her choice and she had to see it through regardless of the consequences. She had chosen him.

 **Meanwhile back at the ranch…**

 **Hey guys! I really hope that you enjoyed the new chapter! A few things that I wanted to address:**

 **First, for all my fellow science nerds out there, botulinum toxin is the toxin used in Botox found in the puffer fish, so it is a real thing. It works by slowly paralyzing your muscles, which takes out all the wrinkles. Since it causes paralysis of the muscles, and the heart is a muscle, in theory if given too much it might possibly stop someone's heart. Though I don't know that you could actually die from it, but it made for an amusing story so I went with it. Maybe someone with some medical know how could throw their opinion my way.**

 **And I couldn't resist calling Captain Phasma Brienne, so I hope you'll forgive me for that. No matter what role she plays, she'll always be Brienne of Tarth to me**

 **Anyways, reviews are greatly appreciated! I would love to hear from you! If I was a Jedi, I would use my powers to compel you to tell me what you think, but I'm not, so the choice is yours to make! I will try to have the next chapter up as quickly as possible. Just be patient with me and I promise to make it worth your time. Anyways, have a great week! Lots of love to you all!**

 **-Boss**


	3. Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Fire

**Hi everyone! Hope you are all enjoying the story so far! I would like to give a special shout out to ShannonSolo, JuliaAurelia, Sophlove, SaintsFan1, PhantomSometimesWrites, Oblivionator, MissusGages, Victini321, DragonGlass, HornedGoddess, Nami Swannn, bluejustice13, and the unnamed guests that have reviewed this story! You guys are the best, and I really appreciate you taking the time to give me some feedback! It inspires me to write faster and make the story even better than I initially planned! And thank you to all those who have followed and favorited as well! Ya'll are my inspiration!**

 **To answer a few of your questions: No, Hux's first name will not be Jaime lol. I do love Game of Thrones though! Funny story, but there is a guy that works at my local CVS who looks just like Theon Greyjoy! No joke! Anyways, the first time I saw him, I called him Theon and told him that I wished to pay the iron price for my items. Guy looked at me like I was crazy, but now he plays along! Whenever I go in there, I always call him Theon, and he always asks me if I want to pay the iron price for my items, or just hand him my debit card like I usually do lol.**

 **To the unnamed guest that commented about botulinum toxin vs. tetrodotoxin: Thank you for clearing that up! I had my toxins mixed up and I apologize. In the future I will do a little more research instead of trying to rely on my rusty college education : )**

 **As for my penname: I teach high school chemistry. I don't make meth like Walter White, but I do get paid to blow shit up occasionally, which is pretty fucking cool.**

 **As for Kylo Ren returning to the First Order, and Rey's choice… It will be revealed in this chapter! And you like longer chapters? Your wish is my command!**

 **I apologize for the delay in posting this, but I wasn't entirely pleased with what I had originally written. I didn't feel that it reflected the best that I could do as a writer, so I ended up trashing and rewriting this chapter, so please forgive my tardiness. Anyways, I won't take up any more of your time! On to the story!**

Chapter 3: Out of the Frying Pan, Into the Fire

Kylo Ren watched her as she slept. To say she was beautiful would be an understatement. Breathtaking was a far more accurate term.

Rey slept with her head in the crook of his neck, her usually tidy triple buns in disarray. Occasionally a stray hair would wander across his face, tickling his nose, but he didn't mind. He felt the quiet rise and fall of her chest against his as she slept. Their naked bodies tangled together beneath his cloak, evidence of the previous night. He hadn't dreamed it. Rey had willingly given herself to him.

Kylo Ren was no stranger to sex. Supreme Leader Snoke had seen to that. The first night he had donned the mask was the night he lost his innocence. It had happened several times after that as well. He would do Snoke's bidding, and in turn Snoke would send a girl to his chambers. He would do as he pleased to her, taking her in whatever way struck his fancy, and then he would send her on her way. He never asked the girls to stay, never woke next to them. Ren had never wanted any of that until now.

None of the girls he had taken looked at him the way Rey did. They had all been afraid of him. He frowned as he remembered the fear that always haunted their eyes. They had allowed him to do as he pleased, but they were never truly willing. He had always tried to convince himself that they were not truly afraid and disgusted at the thought of sex with him, that perhaps the fear in their eyes had been stricken there by Snoke. It only worked for him until they cried when he finished. It happened every time without fail. Then he could no longer deny the monster that he was.

But this was different. Rey was different.

He remembered the hunger in her beautiful hazel eyes as he took her. Even though he had caused her pain, he had also given her pleasure. Kylo Ren remembered what she tasted like. He remembered the way that her thoughts, her memories, and her body had melded to his. Most of all, he remembered the way that she had moaned his name as she orgasmed. No fear and no tears, just passion and rapture.

He had known in that moment that _this_ was how it was supposed to be. Even if Rey decided that last night had been a mistake, it would be too late for him to go back to how things were before.

What Ren had experienced last night was not merely sex. He had made love to a woman for the very first time, and he could not go back to meaningless sex with an unwilling and fearful participant. If Rey didn't want him anymore, he would live out the rest of his days remembering the feel of her beneath him and what they had shared. He would not be able to take another after that.

Kylo Ren gave thought to where he would go from here. His choices were to go back to the First Order, or to go rogue. The First Order was a more appealing option, but then there was Rey. If she decided that last night had not been a mistake, and she wanted to explore whatever the hell this was between them, then he could not return to the First Order.

If Rey decided to leave Hoth with him, he would go rogue. She was his, and he would not share her or leave her fate to Snoke. If Rey trusted him enough to leave with him, he would protect her, even from those he had formerly considered friends and allies. The thought of her choosing him, and making love to her night after night was definitely a thought that he could get used to.

Beside him, Rey's eyes fluttered open and settled on his own, a soft smile spreading across her face.

"How long have you been watching me sleep?" she asked softly.

"A little while," he answered honestly. "I was enjoying the view."

"You like what you see?" she teased.

"Very much," he grinned at her.

Rey bit her bottom lip, and her eyes looked away from him. She blushed as though her actions from the previous night had finally sunk in for her. Kylo Ren tried to read her mind, to see what she was thinking and how she felt about what they had done, but she pushed him out.

"I don't want you in my head right now," she told him flatly. "I need to sort a few things out first, and I don't want you to see any of it until I'm sure."

Rey crawled out from under his cloak, leaving him cold and slightly unsatisfied. She dressed herself, putting her gray clothes from Jakku back on. He could tell from her slow and precise movements as she dressed that she was sore from their actions the previous night. He felt a pang of disgust with himself for being the cause of her pain.

Kylo Ren shook off the slight and began to dress himself as well. He saw Rey sit down next to the fire, crossing her legs beneath her. She faced herself out towards the snowfall. He watched her curiously for a moment until her eyes closed and her breathing slowed. She was meditating.

Without a word he began to cook some breakfast from the store of wampa meat he had brought back with him from the day before. To say he felt a little crazy was an understatement. He wanted so very badly to be in her head, to see what she was thinking; but she had expressly forbidden it and he would not erode her trust by ignoring her wishes. So he simply watched her, giving her the time she needed to sort everything out.

When the wampa was cooked, he took Rey a portion, setting it down wordlessly next to her with a canteen of melted snow to drink. Up close he noticed that she was shivering. Ren silently grabbed his cloak and lay it across her shoulders, only touching her for the briefest of moments.

Rey pulled the cloak tightly around her and inhaled deeply into the fabric. He briefly wondered if the cloak smelled like him, and if she liked the way he smelled. Rey merely nodded her thanks, and Kylo Ren tried to undo the knot that formed in his stomach when he saw the tears in her eyes.

 _You're a monster_ he thought to himself before he tore her eyes away from her.

There were so many things that he wanted, but in the end he settled on giving her some space. Rey ate the food he brought her and closed her eyes to meditate once again. He didn't bother her.

Instead, Kylo Ren went outside and began working on his second wampa hide. He needed hard physical activity to keep his mind off of Rey and he intended to properly tan it and give it to her if she chose to leave Hoth with him. A kill like that should not go without some form of trophy.

He worked diligently all afternoon, using his own wampa hide to keep himself warm as he worked. His body ached from the last few days, but the pain was a welcome distraction from Rey. His face hurt from windburn, his shoulder stung with white hot pain, and he was sore everywhere. He pushed through the pain, using it fuel him as he worked even harder.

When dusk fell, he took his newly fleshed hide and went back into the cave. Rey still sat next to the fire, eyes closed, and his cloak wrapped tightly around her. He cooked some more rations of wampa meat and placed Rey's next to her as he had done at breakfast.

Kylo Ren lay down next to the fire and sandwiched himself between the wampa hides and sent his thoughts to Rey.

 _You're beautiful and I miss you. Come to bed with me please._

It hurt him to ask her like that. He was not used to asking nicely for what he wanted, but he needed her more than he cared to admit, and for her he would make an exception.

 _Soon, I promise_ she answered him back.

Kylo Ren stretched out beneath the hide and tried to relax, feeling the soreness in every muscle of his body. He closed his eyes and focused on the pain, trying to will it from his body. He was succeeding, feeling it start to slip away little by little, that was until he felt her slide between the hides with him.

His eyes shot open at her arrival, and he searched her face for any sign of her thoughts.

"I tried to forget you," Rey said quietly. "I tried to let you go, to imagine myself with the Resistance. I thought about your mother, Finn, Poe, and little BB-8. I thought about living a life with them and never seeing you again. I told myself that was what I wanted, and tried to pull myself back to the light side of the Force. I told myself that I hate you, that what we did last night didn't mean anything."

"Then do what you want. Go back to them," Kylo Ren snapped bitterly.

He could feel his cheeks going hot with embarrassment and disappointment. He had been a fool to think that Rey could ever have feelings for a monster like him. He had given all of himself to her with the idiotic hope that she might possibly reciprocate.

"Ren, listen to me for a minute," she interrupted his thoughts. "I couldn't do it. No matter how hard I tied, all I saw was you. We're connected in a way I don't quite understand, and what we did last night only made that bond stronger. There is no going back, no pretending that this never happened. For better or for worse, I'm tied to you. I don't know what this is between us. I don't know if it will fade or only intensify with time, but I _need_ to know. I'm going with you when you leave Hoth."

"Rey I-" Kylo Ren began, but he stopped at the feel of Rey's hand beneath his belt. She teased him, her eyes never leaving his as she slowly unbuckled his belt. He pulled his shirt off in a rush, and reached down to unbutton his pants, but Rey swatted his had away.

Instead, she leaned down and unclasped the button with her teeth. Kylo Ren was instantly aroused, and Rey smirked at the immediate hardness that had formed in his pants. She pulled the top of his pants down, exposing him to her, and she wrapped her hand around him eagerly.

He almost had a heart attack.

Ren groaned deeply as she slid her hand up and down his shaft. It felt amazing. Better than amazing. As she pumped up and down, he could feel pleasure coiling in his gut, ready to spring loose at any moment. He sat up to take control, but Rey pushed him back.

"No," she commanded him. "I know you've probably never heard that word before, but tonight I'm in charge."

Ren begrudgingly lay back as he was told. "I'm doing this because I want to, and not because you told me to," he smirked, repeating the same thing she had told him the first night they had slept together for warmth.

"Oh shut up," Rey growled at him as she began to remove her belt and pants.

Kylo Ren grinned at her mischievously. "The shirt too," he commanded as she undressed. "I want to touch you."

She complied, removing all of her clothing before straddling his hips with her own. He touched her everywhere, running his hands from her shoulders to her breasts, where he squeezed gently, playing with her erect nipples. He then trailed his hands over her flat stomach and gripped her hips with need.

"Not yet," she admonished him, reading his thoughts.

Rey leaned forward and trailed her lips over his neck seductively. Ren growled low in his throat with want for her. She was teasing him, making him wait, and he was growing impatient. Rey rubbed herself against him, her wetness sending him over the edge. Kylo Ren's breath hitched in his throat.

"Rey," he growled. "Stop teasing me."

He tried to buck his hips up into her, but she held him down with the Force.

"Beg me for it," she commanded him.

She was making him crazy. Kylo Ren, Commander of the First Order, did not beg, and he wasn't about to start now. Rey sensed his defiance and used it to her advantage, grinding against him even harder. Her lips trailed down his chest and stopped level with his hips.

"Beg me," she commanded again. "Just a few little words Kylo Ren, and I'll give myself to you."

He growled again, hating himself for what he was about to do. "Let me have you Rey," he panted between ragged breaths. "Please."

"You have to do better than that," she teased.

"Please let me have you Rey," he whimpered. "I can't take this anymore."

She sank down onto him then, and he groaned as he felt himself fully sheathed inside of her. Rey began to move back and forth on top of him and he was lost to her. Their thoughts melded together once again as she rode him. Her fears, her insecurities, her passion. He could see it all.

Ren bucked his hips up to meet hers as she moved faster. He could feel the tension coiling up inside of him, each movement from Rey threatening to unleash it. Above him Rey mouthed his name and he lost control, finding his release inside of her.

She rode him for a few minutes longer, the contact causing him to shiver, before she rolled off and lay next to him. Kylo Ren pulled her to him and pressed his forehead against hers as they both came down from their orgasms.

"You've seen my thoughts now," he muttered as he closed his eyes. "Are you still afraid I'm toying with you?"

Rey blinked in surprise for a moment, seemingly having forgotten that he could read her thoughts.

"Not anymore," she responded breathlessly. "Is it true? Everything that I saw?"

"Yes," he mumbled, his cheeks darkening with embarrassment. Not being able to hide anything from her was a sometimes unfortunate side effect of the strange bond that they shared.

"You would rather live your life alone then take another woman?" she teased, a touch of pride in her voice and a smile on her face.

"Yes. It would not be the same with another," he replied gruffly, face red with embarrassment.

Rey's grin faded into a more serious expression as she searched his face, her hazel eyes focused on his dark ones.

"This _is_ how it's supposed to be," she told him with certainty. "At least I think so. I couldn't imagine it getting any better."

Kylo Ren smiled softly at her, still a little embarrassed that she knew exactly how he felt. "The Force has bound us together for a reason that is beyond our comprehension," he began shakily. "Though I can't say that I'm upset. You have agreed to leave Hoth with me, which is more than I could have hoped for. I am yours and you are mine, Rey. I will protect you, and you can always depend on me."

"Where will we go," she asked him.

"I don't know yet, but I refuse to trust your fate to Supreme Leader Snoke. I will not be rejoining the First Order." He let out a shaky breath as he pushed one of her free hairs behind her ear. "You make me weak, Rey. You're like a drug that I'm powerless to quit."

"Maybe so," she mused. She tangled her fingers in his dark curls and kissed his forehead gently. "We make each other weak, but together we're stronger then either one of us could ever be alone."

"Yeah, I'm sure those wampas wished they hadn't messed with us," he grinned. "We make a damn good team."

"When I was a girl on Jakku," Rey began thoughtfully. "I used to hear the traders tell stories of women they knew who would run away with men that they loved, knights and freedom fighters and the like. They would run away with them and they would be happy."

"I'm no knight or freedom fighter," Ren chuckled. "So I think you're out of luck there. Any stories of women who ran off with the bad guys? You know, the ones that want to rule the galaxy and kill anyone that gets in their way?"

"It's not funny," Rey sighed. "And you're missing the point."

"Enlighten me."

"I guess what I'm trying to say, is do you think this will end well for us? Do you think we can be happy, or will everything we're running from catch up to us?"

Kylo Ren was silent for a long time, his eyes meeting hers with a softness that she was not used to seeing. "I don't know," he finally answered. "But I promise to keep you safe, and I will do the very best I can to make you happy."

"Thank you Ren," she said softly, and when her lips met his , he knew that he would do everything in his power to keep his promise to her.

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"How do we stand on the attack?" Hux demanded. He had made his way down to the command center this evening in preparation for the Resistance strike. He had learned from personal experience that things usually went more smoothly when he double-checked the work of all of his men.

"We're right on schedule, General" Staff Sergeant Jimmy quipped. "Headed towards Hoth at a fast burn and strike teams are ready. Tie fighters are being prepped as we speak. We should be there a few hours after the storm clears up. We'll hit 'em hard, and then turn and burn."

"Do we have enough fire power to take out the whole base?" he inquired.

"All the explosives you could ever want and more," Jimmy confirmed. The plan is to take out the base in under ten minutes after the first round is fired."

"Excellent," Hux clapped Jimmy on the back. "Have some tie fighters standing by to take out any Resistance ships that try to escape during the attack. I don't want to have to plan all of this again."

"Yes sir."

"And Jimmy," Hux admonished gently. "Just because I'm a good looking red head doesn't mean that you have to emulate me. So do us all a favor and take that stupid dye out of your hair. Looking like me won't get you a promotion."

"Yes, sir!" Jimmy squeaked. "Sorry sir!"

"As you were. I'll be in my quarters preparing for the attack if you need me."

Hux gave Jimmy one last clap on the back and headed out. Truthfully, he had lied about going back to his quarters to prepare for the attack. He was going to get drunk and take the Captain a few times instead, but his crew didn't need to know that. He needed them to focus on the task at hand, though he knew their plan was sound.

The only thing that could possibly put a hiccup in their attack was finding Kylo Ren, but he would worry about that problem tomorrow. For now he whistled a light tune as he headed towards his quarters, where he knew Phasma would be waiting for him.

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"So where do you want to go?" Kylo Ren asked casually.

He sat next to the fire with his wampa hide wrapped around his shoulders. Rey sat between his legs, wrapped up in his cloak and leaned back against his chest. Ren wrapped his arms around her protectively as they watched the snowfall.

"I get to pick?" she asked skeptically.

Kylo Ren chuckled lightly. "Of course you get to pick, as long as you don't pick Jakku. If you pick Jakku, I'm going to have to overrule you."

"Hey! There's nothing wrong with Jakku, you jerk," she spat, elbowing him in the ribs. "But it would be nice to go somewhere green."

"Somewhere green it is," he conceded. "We'll have to head back towards the Resistance base, but I could feel people through the Force a few miles to the east of there. We'll head that way and see about buying or renting a ship and getting off this rock."

They sat in silence for some time, waiting on sunrise. Rey realized with a start that she would miss this when they made it back to civilization. She had grown used to it being just the two of them. In the past few days they had made love half a dozen times, and Rey had a mind to tell him that he was never getting his cloak back. She was keeping it as a souvenir. She liked the way that it smelled like him, and it gave her a strange sort of comfort.

"If you like the cloak that much, it's yours," he said, reading her mind. "I can always get another one."

"And what if I decide that I want your new one too?" Rey teased.

Ren merely shrugged offhandedly, as though the theft of his clothing would be inconsequential.

Rey leaned into him and closed her eyes, letting the strong, steady beat of his heart lull her to sleep as they waited.

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Finn chased down his eighth shot of whisky with some Cola. His throat and chest burned nicely and his vision was starting to blur.

"So did you do a lot of drinking in the First Order?" Poe asked him as he chased down another shot of his whiskey.

"Yeah we did," Finn admitted fondly. "The guys were really great. Not so different than our Resistance guys. I mean sure, we had some crazy Kylo Ren fans. Most of the women had pictures of him in their quarters. Don't really want to know what they did with those. There were even some of the men who idolized him. He was their hero. Most of the guys liked Captain Phasma though. I was never really into her, mostly because she scared the shit out of me."

Finn burst out laughing as he tried to continue. "And then there was this one guy named Jimmy. _Everyone_ made fun of Jimmy. The guy wanted to _be_ General Hux. Dressed like him, and did his hair and everything. It was so weird."

Poe joined in laughing with him then, and for a few minutes they had trouble catching their breath.

"The rest of the guys were all pretty normal though, just average guys trying to make a living for their families. They were nice. I only left because I didn't want to die or lose any more friends in senseless slaughter. I mean, it's all good and fine if you're fighting for a bigger cause, but how do you know? When you're just a foot soldier, it's hard to tell if what you're fighting for is really worth it or not."

Poe nodded solemnly. "Well either way, I'm glad you're here. And I'm sorry about Rey. I know you two were close. I never intended for any of that to happen."

Finn frowned deeply as he took another shot of whiskey. He had been trying not to think about Rey, but everything always seemed to lead him back to her.

"I know you have feelings for her Finn," Poe continued. "And I can't say I blame you. She's beautiful."

"Do you think he killed her?" Finn asked suddenly, taking Poe by surprise. "Do you think he killed her already, and we're going to be wasting our time looking for her, when all we're going to find is a body?"

"Rey's bested Kylo Ren before," Poe pointed out. "She can take care of herself."

"It's different this time though. On Starkiller Base he was wounded and already tired from kicking my ass. Damn it! I should be out there with her!"

"There's nothing you can do Finn. She wasn't going to tell you about going after Kylo Ren, because she knew it was dangerous and you wouldn't let her go. Honestly, I don't know why the guy's still alive in the first place. She should have let him die on Starkiller."

"Rey has a heart of gold," Finn said softly. "She's better than you or I could ever hope to be." Finn took another shot of whiskey to fend off the tears that had begun to form in his eyes.

"If she's alive, we'll find her. I promise." Poe said gently.

Finn merely nodded, too tired and intoxicated to even think.

"And when we do find her, maybe you'll get the balls to finally ask her out," Poe smirked.

"Asshole," Finn shot back. Both men laughed raucously before Poe became serious once again.

"Are we cool?" he asked tentatively.

"Yeah, we're cool," Finn replied. "I know it's not really your fault. I was just angry and I took it out on you."

"No worries, friend," Poe waved him off.

The bartender brought them both another shot of whiskey, and Poe held his up in preparation for a toast.

"To friendship!" he boomed. "For all of those we've lost, and for those we're about to find."

"I can drink to that," Finn grinned, clinking their shot glasses together.

The two men drained their drinks, hoping that their upcoming mission would prove to be successful.

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Rey hated the snow. It was cold and wet, and beyond frustrating. They had been traveling for several hours now, and she felt as though their progress was slow at best, and at worst she would be ninety before they made it off Hoth.

Every step was agonizingly tiring. The snow was waist deep in some places, and it was like climbing a flight of stairs to even move forward. After only half an hour, Ren had ordered her to walk directly behind him, stepping in his footprints so she wouldn't have to fight so hard. I worked to a certain extent, but the snow still sucked and she was still exhausted.

Around them, the snowfall was at a minimum, leaving the environment far less hostile than it had been for the last week. The air was cold and crisp, and if she wasn't fighting the snow, Rey would have considered it a beautiful day.

Ahead of her, Kylo Ren cut the path, leading them towards the Resistance base at a pace that Rey was beginning to despise with every fiber of her being. Her lungs burned from the cold air, and her legs were on fire.

Ren stopped, turning to her with a quizzical look on his face. He pursed his lips, and looked like he wanted to laugh.

"We're you just thinking that you were going to grow a beard and die of old age before we make it off Hoth?" he asked, amusement lacing his words.

"Yes," she replied flatly.

"I guess you'd still be pretty cute, even if you did have facial hair," he laughed.

Rey wanted to hit him, but she didn't have the strength to walk over to him, so she settled on an angry glare. Her glare only seemed to make him laugh harder. He laughed for a few minutes, before he walked over to her, giving her an impish grin.

"Need a lift?" he asked, all teasing gone from his voice.

Rey thought about telling him no, and that he could go kick rocks for all she cared, but the ache in her legs overrode her anger with him.

"Yes please," she growled irritably.

With a laugh, Ren scooped her up and pulled her to his chest. "I'm only carrying you because I'm not really crazy about beards," he joked. "It would be uncomfortable when you kiss me."

Rey growled, and smacked him lightly on the chest. "You're infuriating."

"It's part of my charm," he grinned. "And you're beautiful, so let's keep it that way."

Rey had nothing to say to that, his compliment taking her off guard. She leaned into him, matching the steady rise and fall of his chest with her own as they traveled towards their destination. It might have been minutes or hours before he spoke again, for Rey had lost track of time. Suddenly, Kylo Ren stopped in his tracks, and when he spoke fear was evident in his voice.

"We may have a problem."

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"Permission to fire sir? Staff Sergeant Jimmy requested as Hux looked over the schematics of the Resistance base.

"It's been confirmed that Kylo Ren is not at the base?" Hux asked skeptically.

"Yes sir" Jimmy quipped. "Our informant says that Kylo Ren took off about a week ago. Haven't seen him since. Said the scavenger girl is missing too."

General Hux could feel a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Perhaps Ren had fallen to the scavenger girl. Even if he had slain her, Hux seriously doubted his ability to survive for a week in the kind of storm that Hoth had been experiencing. . More likely than not, Kylo Ren would be dead somewhere under the snow. He had to be sure though.

"Prepare a tie fighter for myself and two troopers. I will be searching the planet for any sign of Kylo Ren. And Jimmy," he said, a grin stretching across his face. "You may fire at will."

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Finn urged his speeder faster across the snow-covered landscape. In his helmet comm system he could hear Poe Dameron and Jessika Pava bantering on about something.

They had been out since this morning looking for Rey and had thus far found nothing. Any tracks she might have made through the snow would be covered completely by now, so Finn was holding on to the hope that one of them would have the good luck to stumble upon her.

"What do you think Finn?" he heard Poe ask him over the comm system.

"Huh?"

"Jessika says she's a better pilot than I am, but we all know that's not true. What do you think?"

Finn seemed to consider their argument for a moment before responding.

"I'm going to have to go with Jessika," he said resolutely. "She's prettier."

"Ouch! Burn!" Jessika shouted. "In your face Poe!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Poe scoffed. "Hey man, I thought we were friends? Now Jessika's never going to let me live this down. As if her ego wasn't already inflated enough anyways…"

"Sorry," Finn chuckled. "I'll have to make it up to you."

"You can make it up to me by taking her down tonight. They're broadcasting the pod races from Tatooine on the sports channel. Jessika's putting all of her money on some pretty boy from the Outer Rim. I think the Hutt's cousin, Marx, is going to win. Those races are always rigged."

"Whatever!" Jessika interrupted. "No way Marx is going to win. He drives worse than my grandma!"

"Do you see what you've done Finn?" Poe whined. "You've created a monster, and I'm going to have to listen to her all night! Come out with us and help me take Jessika to the cleaners. It's the least you could do. I'll buy your drink."

"Deal," Finn agreed. "I'll-"

He stopped short at the sight ahead. He quickly pulled his speeder over and came to a complete top, scrambling off as fast as he could. In front of him was a cave, and the mutilated body of a dead wampa.

He approached with caution, though he was certain that the creature was already dead. The head had been completely cut off, the work of a lightsaber apparent. He saw burn marks on the rocks outside of the cave, and on the cave itself.

Inside, Finn saw the remains of a fire, and dried blood on some of the rocks that lined the interior. Someone had been here recently, either Rey or Kylo Ren. He didn't know which one, but one of them had most certainly been here.

"Finn, are you listening to me?" Poe came through the comm system. His tone of voice told Finn that he had been speaking to him for some time.

"Yeah," Finn responded slowly, still looking around.

"We need to get back to base, Finn. There's a problem."

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"Are you sure it's the First Order?" Leia asked cautiously.

"Affirmative General," her radar tech conceded. "A large First Order Destroyer and ten tie fighters. They're casually targeting us on their scopes." 

"Alrgiht then," she began calmly. "Here's what we're going to do. "Prepare the Milennium Falcon for takeoff, and have our best pilots take the X-wings out to distract them. We can get everyone on board and rendezvous with the X-wing pilots off planet. As far as the equipment goes, take only what we can carry after everyone's on board. We can buy more equipment, but we can't buy more people. Understood?"

"Yes General," the tech barked. "It will be done."

"Good," she said. "And have someone call Finn, Poe, and Jessika back. We need all the fighters we can get. Right now, our only hope is that they won't fire because they think we still have Ben. Once they find out he's gone, they'll blast us, so we need to play that bluff for all it's worth."

"General!" the tech shouted suddenly. 'They've fired missiles!"

"Then return fire!" she commanded. "We don't go down without a fight! Get everyone out of here and get the ships running _now!_ "

No sooner than she started moving the base shook violently from impact. The First Order had seen right through them and their bluff had been called. All they could do now was survive.

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Rey's blood ran cold as she heard the scream of a tie fighter flying overhead. Kylo Ren sat her down in the snow, and reached for his lightsaber, igniting it immediately. Rey followed suit, ready for battle.

"Stay close to me," he commanded her. "We're going to go to the base and use the confusion to steal a ship."

Before Rey could even respond he was moving, and she had to run to keep up with his long strides. The Resistance base loomed ahead of them, and Rey jumped when a section of it exploded. Above them, tie fighters screamed, and she could hear the engines of X-wings roaring to life. It was war, and she and Ren were caught in the middle of it.

"Duck!" he shouted to her.

She got her head down just in time to avoid being decapitated by a low flying tie fighter. It fired shots at them, which Kylo Ren deflected with his lightsaber while she tried to catch her breath.

At the base, six X-wing fighters went airborne, their engines whining as they took on the tie fighters in combat. The sky above them lit up red as shots were fired from both sides. Another large explosion lit up the white expanse of Hoth, as a second missile was fired by the First Order destroyer. The ground shook from the impact, and Rey nearly lost her footing.

A X-wing broke away from the aerial fight, and fired shot at them, which Kylo Ren again deflected with his lightsaber.

Rey stood, momentarily paralyzed as she took in the carnage around her. She could feel Ren tugging at her arm, urging her to move, but everything seemed surreal. It was as if she was observing the whole scene from a distance.

As she watched the Resistance base burn, she suddenly thought of Finn, Poe, Leia, and little BB-8. _What if they were in there, burning alive?_ They were her friends, and even though she had promised to leave with Kylo Ren, agreeing to never see them again, she still couldn't let them die. Right now she was here, on Hoth, and she could do something to save them.

"I have to go get them!" she shouted at Kylo Ren. "I have to find Finn, and Poe, and Leia, and BB-8!"

"We're not going anywhere!" he shouted back at her. "They're probably dead, and if they're not, they'll want to kill me on sight! We don't have time for this! We need to get out of here before this whole place goes up in flames!"

"I never said _we_ ," Rey clarified. "I'm going to get them. You're not. I don't think your presence would go over well."

Ren's face twisted strangely as he took in her words. She couldn't tell if he was angry, upset, or maybe even both.

"Don't do this Rey," he begged. "Come with me. You told me you would."

"I'll meet you by the ships. I promise. If they're alive I have to help them."

"Rey, please…"

"I promise."

Before he could say anything else, she wrapped her arms around him and pressed her lips to his, reveling in the heat his kisses brought her. He kissed her back desperately, as though he could convince her to stay.

Rey pulled away from him, his dark eyes searching her face with a softness that he reserved only for her.

"Please don't go…"

She pressed her lips to his once more, cutting the kiss off quickly, and then pulled away. She brought the hood of his cloak up over her head and winked at him with a confidence she didn't quite feel.

"I'll meet you there. I promise. Don't leave Hoth without me."

Rey didn't wait for a reply. She just turned around and ran towards the burning base as fast as her legs could carry her, leaving Kylo Ren behind her in the snow.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Finn drove his speeder at the maximum speed, dodging bullets from roaming tie fighters as he moved. Behind him Poe and Jessika followed on his heels, all three of them weaving in and out to avoid being hit. All lighthearted banter had stopped, and they approached the base with a sense of dread and urgency.

The three of them stopped in front of the base, dismounting in one swift motion. General Organa was trying to organize the masses, trying to get as many Resistance fighters out as she could, and trying to help even those who were wounded and dying.

"General Organa!" Poe shouted to her. "What can we do?"

Finn could visibly see relief in her eyes at the sight of them.

"Poe, I need you to fly an X-wing and clear the path for us. Jessika, I need you to fly the Milennium Falcon out of here, and Finn, I need you to gather as many people as you can on the Falcon. We're leaving now."

"Yes ma'am," they all three said in unison. "Are you coming with us?" Finn asked her hopefully.

"Not right now," she admitted. "But soon. Fire those engines up and wait on me, but if I don't make it there by the time everyone is on board, I want you to take off without me. That's an order."

"Yes ma'am," he nodded, and the three of them took off towards the ships.

They ran fast, trying to avoid enemy fire, and almost made it to their destination when a tie fighter spotted them and broke free of the fight in the sky. It swooped down at them, firing to kill.

Finn dove to the ground, hearing Poe and Jessika do the same, but the shots never hit him. Instead, they were deflected by Rey's blue lightsaber.

Finn pulled himself off the ground and his eyes widened at the figure before him. It was unmistakably Rey's lightsaber, but Kylo Ren's cloak hung about the shoulders of his rescuer.

 _He killed her_ was his first and only thought. Without thinking anything through, he lunged, intending to try and take Kylo Ren in hand-to-hand combat.

Before he could reach him, Kylo Ren crumpled to the ground gracelessly. He noted a dart in his neck and looked back to see Jessika holding a blow-gun.

"Tranquilizer," she explained easily. "I brought it just in case we ran into that son of a bitch. He's not dead, but he'll be out for awhile."

Finn gave her a thumbs up, and turned the lifeless body over, so he could see the face.

 _It wasn't Kylo Ren. It was Rey._

"It's Rey!" he exclaimed joyfully. "She's alive!"

"Oh shit…" Jessika mumbled. "She's gonna be pissed when she wakes up."

"We'll worry about that later," Poe jumped in. "Right now we need to get off this planet."

Finn scooped Rey into his arms and followed Poe and Jessika as they ran to the Falcon. He was experiencing a thousand emotions all at once. He had so many questions for her, but none of that mattered right now. All that mattered to him was that she was alive and safe, and he was going to get her out of here.

When they reached the Falcon, Finn ran inside and deposited the unconscious Rey onto one of the crew bunks. Afterwards, he ran back outside to help load the ship.

Jessika, C-3PO, and R2-D2 were pointing the ragtag group of Resistance survivors in the right direction, while BB-8 rolled around the ship, beeping happily. He gladly joined them, loading on as many people as he possibly could, and waving to Poe as he powered up an X-wing for takeoff.

The ground shook, threatening to knock them off of their feet as another missile hit the base. The flames were so close that Finn could feel the heat, even from several hundred feet away.

He scanned the horizon for General Organa, hoping that she had made it out in time. He didn't see her anywhere, and it was beginning to worry him. He would hold off their departure for as long as possible to give her the best chance to make it, but they couldn't wait forever.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kylo Ren moved fast across the snow, an X-wing fighter in hot pursuit. The X-wing dipped down, and he dove across the snow. He rolled, barely avoiding shots fired. When he came out of the roll he was ready to fight.

He swung his lightsaber at the X-wing as it doubled back for him, deflecting shot after shot. His crimson blade purred as he swung, filling his veins with adrenaline and making him feel alive.

The X-wing made a second pass, firing at him again. This time, he deflected the shot back towards the fighter, blowing the engine. The X-wing shrieked as it fell from the sky, exploding a mere fifty feet from Kylo Ren.

He could still feel the heat from the explosion when he started moving again, running towards the ships.

"Ben!" a voice called out ahead of him.

It was his mother.

Leia Organa was attempting to take on a tie fighter like the fearless woman that she was. She held a blaster in her right hand, shooting, and dodging the return fire when it came. She was strong in the Force, and had the reflexes to prove it, but a blaster was no match for a tie fighter.

Kylo Ren weighed his options, and made his decision in less than a second. Supreme Leader Snoke was already going to want him dead after he defected with Rey. What was one more act of defiance?

Before he could change his mind, he ran to her, swinging his lightsaber wildly. He blocked one shot and then another. Leia scrambled for cover as the tie fighter dove down.

Ren slashed at it as it flew by, taking off the lower half of one wing. The tie fighter spun through the air, it's ability for flight lost. The pilot shot at him, but with it's spin, the shots fired wildly with no real direction.

The tie fighter crashed into the snow several hundred yards away and exploded, spraying flame into the sky. Kylo Ren let out a whoop of victory, and turned to celebrate with Leia. His celebration however, was stopped short at the sight of her.

Leia Organa was struggling to lift herself off of the ground, a dark pool of blood beneath her.

 _No._

He ran to her and tried to pull her to her feet. She held fast to him, but doubled over as she tried to walk, causing her to stumble. He never let go of her. He fell to his knees as she stumbled, and held her in the snow.

A large dark spot covered her chest where she had taken fire, and Ren could feel hot tears threatening to spill from his eyes unbidden. She was much older than he remembered, her dark hair streaked with gray, and the lines on her face more prominent, but she was still the same woman he knew.

He had turned from the Resistance, turned from his parents, and killed his own father. He was not a good man, and he knew that he never would be, but in that moment he was not Kylo Ren. He was Ben Solo, a little boy, begging his mother to stay with him when he was afraid.

Despite his anger, he had never found it in his heart to hate Leia Organa. She was his mother. She had raised him, cared for him, and held him when Han Solo was too drunk or too busy gambling to come home. She had always been there for him, and despite his call to the dark side, he had never wanted her to die.

"Ben," she whispered, her eyes filling with tears. "You've grown up so much. You're so handsome now, like your father when we first met. Well, except for the scar. Han never fought as much as you. He always tried to talk his way out of everything."

She touched his face gently, her hand resting on his cheek. Kylo Ren could feel his body shaking uncontrollably as he held her.

"Mom, I'm sorry," he told her, the tears spilling over.

"I love you Ben," she smiled. "I will always love you."

"Mom, I-"

Leia closed her eyes, and Ren could feel the life leave her as she died in his arms.

He howled in a feral rage, feeling the dark side of the Force coursing through him in his anger. He rose from the snow, still holding Leia in his arms, and boldly made his way towards the ships. He would find a ship. He would find Rey. They would leave this place, and together they would give his mother a proper burial.

He saw the Millennium Falcon take off from the base as he got close, with an X-wing leading it out and shooting down any tie fighters that got in their way. The Resistance, or some of them, it seemed would get away.

As he reached the remaining ships, he searched for one that could hold several passengers. After several minutes of weighing his options, he selected a ship that looked like a double cockpit X-wing fighter with seats that sat back to back. It seemed fast and easy to fly, so it would have to do.

The ground shook violently as another missile was fired, and Kylo Ren watched as the remainder of the Resistance base went up in flames. He placed Leia's body reverently in the cockpit of the fighter he had chosen and searched for Rey.

The scanned the horizon in all directions, but could see no sign of her anywhere. He began to worry, and he searched for her through the Force, clinging to the very feel of her.

He sensed her, but she was far away. He kept searching until he landed on her exact location.

 _The Millennium Falcon._

She was with the Resistance. She had chosen to join them once again.

 _She had left him._

Ren let out a strangled cry of agony, cursing his stupidity. He reached for his lightsaber, igniting it, and began destroying everything in sight.

He slashed and swung at the X-wing fighters that had been left behind. He struck them over and over, until they became little more than charred pieces of metal that resembled ships.

He was so engrossed in his rage that he failed to hear the tie fighter that landed softly behind him. The metallic hiss of a door opening caught his attention, and he turned to see the grinning face of General Hux as he disembarked.

"Kylo Ren," he smirked arrogantly. "It's been too long."

 **That's all for this chapter! Hopefully there won't be a problem with the formatting on this one. My last chapter was typed correctly on my computer, but the breaks between scenes got lost in translation somewhere, so please let me know if there's a problem!**

 **I thought you guys might find this interesting, but a student of mine has this crazy theory that Kylo Ren is actually a good guy. I asked him about it, and he said that he wants to finish what Darth Vader started, which is taking out the Sith and bringing balance to the Force, but in order to do that, he has to have all the power of the dark side first. He thinks that's why he killed Han Solo. Anyways… I don't think Disney's going to go with that angle, but it's an interesting theory nonetheless…**

 **I hope you are all enjoying the story so far, and I hope to have the next update done a little sooner. Leave me some comments! I love to hear from you, and it makes me want to write faster! ; ) Until next time! Lots of love!**

 **-Boss**


	4. Smoke and Mirrors

**Hi everyone! Just wanted to take a second to thank everyone who has favorited, followed, and reviewed this story! Writing this has been a major task and your love and support gives me the strength to go on, so thank you so much!**

 **I would also like to give a shout out to HornedGoddess, petite-plume-sage, JuliaAurelia, DDLo18, Azera-v, SaintsFan1, Aleta Wolff, Nami Swannn, Sam, tkru, katinkers, ShortySC22, Selphie Ivy, and our unnamed guests who reviewed this story! You guys are awesome and your reviews inspire me to write faster! ; ) A very special thank you goes out to starwars12 for your review! I'm so glad this is your favorite story! You totally made my day!**

 **I was made aware of the fact that some of you were upset with me for killing of Leia. I apologize for upsetting you, as that was not my intention. As a writer, I strive to make my stories as realistic as I possibly can for the setting. War is ugly, and unfortunately, not everyone gets to live. I had already planned to kill off two more major characters in this chapter, and I struggled with my decision to do that after reading your reviews. I would love to let everyone live, but that's just not my style. I also would like to avoid having a lynch mob at my door, so after much thought I believe I have come to a solution that will please everyone.**

 **I will write the chapter as I initially intended, with two major character deaths. Rey and Kylo Ren will both live to see the end of the chapter, but I can't make promises for anyone else. So, if you don't want to read about anyone dying, I will insert 00000000 before and after the scene. If you don't want anyone to die, skip the scene. It's that simple. I will even add a very short alternate version in the authors note at the end where everyone lives and their disappearances will be explained in a fun and non-deadly way. There! Everyone can be happy!**

 **Anyways, get out your tiny violins and buckle your seatbelts, 'cause this chapter has more angst and gets more action than an emo teenager! Enjoy!**

Chapter 4: Smoke and Mirrors

 _Kylo Ren kissed her passionately, his lips taking hers in greedily. Rey could feel the need behind his kiss, the purely animal drive that controlled him._

 _Control. Something that he had always been lacking, but at the moment Rey found that she didn't care. She had lost control too._

 _His lips left hers and began trailing down her neck with need. Rey gasped for air, moaning at the feel of his tongue on the sensitive skin of her throat. Her hands trailed down his chest, reveling in the feel of hard muscle. She reached his belt and he groaned as she touched him, his need hard against his pants. She made quick work of both his pants and hers._

 _Ren pulled her onto his lap, and she straddled him, sinking down onto him in one fluid motion. He moaned her name as she began to move, pulling her close. She could feel his hot breath on her ear, and it only served to make her grind against him faster._

 _Rey tangled her hands in his dark curls and kissed him passionately, trying desperately to convey everything she felt for him in that one kiss. He was her everything, and the feel of him inside of her was all she ever wanted and more._

 _His hips bucked up into her, and as he finished he moaned her name once again. Rey finished with him, her orgasm taking her over the edge of pleasure. They laid back on the bed, Rey resting her head on his chest and matching the erratic beat of his heart to her own._

 _"You are mine Rey, and I am yours," he whispered. "For as long as I live, it will only be you. Please don't go."_

 _Rey could feel tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "I won't," she told him. "I promise. I won't leave you."_

 _"The scavenger girl abandoned you Kylo Ren," a strange nasally voice sounded out. "You mean nothing to her."_

 _"No!" Rey argued. "It's not like that! You don't understand!"_

 _She looked to his face, wanting to tell him it was an accident, needing to let him know that she would never leave him like that. Instead of meeting his dark eyes, all she could see was the mask._

 _"No! Listen to me Ren!" she begged._

 _She reached for him, but he was gone, leaving her alone in the bed. She could feel hot tears streaming down her face._

 _"No. Please don't leave…" she begged, but he was already gone._

Rey woke up in a cold sweat. Tears poured from her eyes, soaking her pillow and Ren's cloak. Her body shoot violently as she cried, unable to stop. What had started out as a beautiful dream had quickly spiraled into a nightmare.

It was not her first. She had suffered from nightmares every single night since she had lost him. The dark, confining chamber that she called her room did not make matters better.

It had been two months since Hoth. She had cried until she thought that she was no longer capable of tears, and then she cried some more. The doctor they had forced her to see had diagnosed her with post-traumatic stress disorder, but Rey knew better. PTSD was not the cause of her suffering. It wasn't the after effects of her ordeal, but the loss of _him_ that she grieved.

Rey remembered how lost and afraid she had been when she was late getting her monthly blood. She knew that she and Kylo Ren had been foolish on Hoth, only living in the moment, and she feared the worst. She had cried herself to sleep for a week before she finally bled. It had been a relief to her, until she realized that she had nothing left of him to hold on to. Even his cloak no longer smelled of him.

Rey had spent every night trying to reach out to Ren through the Force. She could feel his presence, though it was very dim. His aura was all rage and hate. Despite her best efforts, she had not been able to communicate with him. She didn't know if he was blocking her from his mind, or if she was simply not strong enough to reach him at such a distance.

She had hoped that he would come for her, but now that hope seemed like the far off dream of a stupid little girl. In Ren's eyes she had betrayed him by breaking her promise. He would not come for her, because he believed that she had made her choice.

Life with the Resistance had not been easy either. She had to give some credit to Finn for trying. He brought her dinner and ate with her in her quarters every single night, and he tried to make her feel like she was a part of the Resistance, but both of them knew that was not the case.

She was a prisoner. The stares and looks from other members of the Resistance were too obvious and too aloof. Ever since she had told the story of how she survived, they had looked at her differently. No one here had any love for Kylo Ren. She wasn't the enemy, but she had fraternized with the enemy, which in their eyes was just as bad.

Rey was restricted to only certain areas of the new Resistance base. She was allowed to go to the mess hall, her room, and a few of the common areas, but nowhere else. It seemed that they did not trust her unless she was in a place where she could be watched. Finn had coaxed her out of her room a few times, but the stares were always present, and eventually she had decided she no longer wanted to leave her quarters.

Her first week on the base, Rey had tried to meet with General Organa. If anyone could understand, it would have been her. Except that she was dead.

Rey had been shocked to hear that she had died on Hoth, and rumor was that Kylo Ren had killed her. One of the Resistance fighters claimed that he saw Kylo Ren standing over her body as they took off.

She should have believed the rumors, should have hated him for the monster that he was, but she couldn't. Every time she dreamed, she saw his lopsided grin and the softness in his eyes. She felt his body on hers, and remembered the way his lips started a fire in her very core.

It was the only way she could think of him now. He was her ally and her lover, not her enemy.

Somehow she had to make things right with him. She had to go to him. Even if he was angry and rejected her, she at least had to try. If she didn't try and she stayed with the Resistance, she would always wonder what could have happened.

Rey buried her face in Kylo Ren's cloak and closed her eyes. She would come up with a plan and she would find Ren. She had to. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally fell asleep again, and when she dreamed, it was of Kylo Ren's lips on hers.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Poe and Finn had spent the last hour in the command center of their new base on Takodana. They had chosen Takodana, because it was the last place the First Order would look for them.

They had built a small base amidst the rubble of the First Order strike only months before. From the air, the rubble hid them, and it was highly unlikely that the First Order would approach by ground unless someone tipped them off. It was the perfect place for their ragtag group to lick their wounds from Hoth and get themselves back together.

With no real leader at their base, Poe had stepped in and taken charge, but the job was wearing on him. Finn could see dark circles under his eyes, and he had been drinking much more than usual.

The two of them stood around a large holomap that R2-D2 and BB-8 were displaying together.

"I think I've figured out where Luke Skywalker is," Poe announced. "There's a planet right here where the map indicates. It's not on our maps, so I'm not exactly sure of the coordinates, but I think that's where he is."

He pointed to a small dot on BB-8's portion of the map. Finn took in the information thoughtfully.

"Ok so what's the plan? Are we sending someone to look for him?" he asked.

"Actually," Poe began slowly. "I was thinking about going myself."

Finn looked at him skeptically. "Who's going to run the base if you leave? The chain of command is pretty unstable right now as it is."

"I've called our base on Q'Dar and they're sending someone over in a few weeks to run the place." Poe told him. "I'm not leader material Finn. I don't like it, and the job's making me crazy. I just want to fly my X-wings and not worry about the logistics."

"Fair enough," Finn agreed. "You've done a good job running the base, but I understand. I know it's been stressful on you. If you leave, who will be in charge until your replacement gets here?"

Poe looked at him for a long time, and it finally dawned on Finn that he was thinking of him.

"Me?" he gaped. "Why me?"

"I trust you. I trust you more than anyone else here. If I asked you, would you do it?"

"Yeah… I mean… what about Jessika?"

Poe grinned slyly. "Yeah, about that…" he drawled. "Jessika's coming with me."

"What? Did I miss something?" Finn asked perplexed.

Poe just grinned at him.

"You two are seriously together?"

"Had a few drinks with her last night. We finally had our DTR talk. It's official now," Poe grinned.

"Congrats man!" Finn exclaimed, grinning back at him. "I'm really happy for you."

"I really like her a lot," Poe continued. "That's why I want her to come with me. I'm afraid if she stays here, she'll find somebody else, and we can't have that happening."

Finn laughed with his friend. "I get it man. Good for you. Yeah, I'll take over while you're gone."

"I knew I could count on you. You shouldn't have to do too much. Just make sure everyone behaves and keep an eye out for the First Order. If the techs hear anything, they'll let you know. And just in case…"

Poe took Finn over to the command center main computer, and pointed underneath. "There's a battery powered box down here with a button on it. If anything happens where you feel you can't defend the base, hit the button. There's two tons of explosives hooked up underground. This place will blow sky high taking out you and everyone within a five mile radius."

"I'll try to avoid that," Finn joked. "But good to know it's there all the same."

"I really appreciate your friendship," Poe said honestly. "I couldn't have held this base together over the last two months without you."

"Don't mention it," Finn grinned. "You've always had my back, so it's the least I could do. How about you let me buy you a drink before you head out?"

"You know it brother. There's a pod race on this week, and I'm determined to beat Jessika this time. I might just kill myself if I have to spend months in a ship listening to her brag about how she was right."

Finn laughed and clapped Poe on the back. He understood why he had to leave, but he would be lying if he said he wouldn't miss him. He only hoped that he could hold the base together half as well as Poe had. It was certainly going to be a challenge.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kylo Ren returned to his quarters only to be immediately enraged. Snoke had sent him a girl.

The girl was young, probably no older than eighteen, with blond hair and pretty blue eyes. She was scantily clad and sitting on his couch. When he walked in, the girl looked at him and flashed him a forced grin.

"Hello Commander Ren," she greeted slowly. "Supreme Leader Snoke has sent me as a gift to you for your valor in battle. You have slain many Resistance fighters, and he wishes to reward you."

He barely glanced at her before he walked to his bedroom. Behind him, he could feel the girl watching him with a mix of fear and interest. He dug through his closet until he found an old black long sleeve shirt and pants that he had worn several years ago. He walked back out to the girl, tossing her the clothes.

"Put these on, you look like a whore. Then get the hell out," he growled at her beneath his mask.

"But… Supreme Leader Snoke gave me direct orders to…"

"I don't give a shit what Supreme Leader Snoke told you to do!" he roared, turning on her. "I said to get the hell out!"

The girl shrank back in fear, and Kylo Ren forced himself to take his voice down a notch. He sighed, and waved his hand in front of her.

"You will put the clothes on. You will leave this room. You will reevaluate your life and find that you want a new career."

He walked away from her, closing the door to his bedroom behind him. He waited until he heard her leave before he let his anger take over.

Kylo Ren grabbed the lamp next to his bedside, and threw it against the door, breaking it into a thousand pieces. He was angry, no, he was furious, though that seemed to have been his mood most of the time as of late. The stormtroopers were terrified of him, hell, the entire First Order was terrified of him right now.

The dark side of the Force had consumed him, and there was no light in him, save for Rey. The memory of their time together was the only good that he had left, though it was fading with each passing day.

He briefly wondered if Rey was with child, and if she was, if she would find some way to tell him, or just merely destroy it. The latter would certainly be the more sensible choice for her. Ren's stomach turned at the thought of Rey destroying their child, and he pushed the thought from his mind entirely. He had been far too careless with both his heart and his body and now he was paying the price.

Supreme Leader Snoke had not been pleased when he had learned of Kylo Ren's treachery. In the end, ironically, it was his mother's death that had saved his life. If Leia had lived, Snoke would have killed him. He even said as much, though the punishment he had received had been almost as bad. The bruise on his neck had faded away a month ago, but he still bore scars across his body from Snoke's Force lightning.

He had been reinstated, but the message was clear. This was his second and last chance. Should he prove to be disobedient in any way, Snoke would not hesitate to kill him.

Kylo Ren growled low in his throat, the sound strained through his mask. He had not taken it off except to shower since Hoth, mostly because he couldn't stand to look at his own face. He wore it everywhere, even in his quarters, and even when he slept, or tried to sleep anyways. He hadn't slept through the night since he was with Rey and it showed.

Dark circles had become permanent fixtures under his eyes and his face lacked any life. His skin was pale and his eyes were cold and hard now. At least that was what he looked like a month ago. He broke his only mirror after that, unable to face his own disgusting decline.

His mother's death and Rey's betrayal weighed more heavily on him than he cared to admit. He had the galaxy at his fingertips and all he could think of was ending his own miserable existence.

A knock on his door brought him out of his reverie.

"I told you to get the hell out!" he growled. "Are you deaf as well as dumb?"

"Commander Ren," a female voice called out from the other side of the door. "General Hux requests your presence in the command center immediately."

Ren opened the door slowly to find the shiny uniform of Captain Phasma on the other side.

"General Hux requests my presence at this hour of the night?" he asked skeptically.

"Yes sir," she confirmed. "He has news of a Resistance outpost."

That caught his attention.

He exited his quarters, shutting the door behind him, and followed Phasma down the hallway. For a few minutes neither of them spoke, each lost in their own thoughts. Finally, it was Captain Phasma who broke the silence.

"I didn't know General Organa personally," she began slowly. "We've been on opposite sides of this war from the beginning, but I respected the hell out of her, and I was sorry to hear about her death."

"Any particular reason you're telling me this Captain?" Kylo Ren growled.

"She's was your mother," Phasma replied simply. "And it's okay for you to grieve her, even if everyone else tells you it's not. If you need someone to talk to, I'll listen, and I won't tell anyone."

Kylo Ren regarded her for a moment before speaking.

"I appreciate your concern for my wellbeing Captain Phasma, but I assure you I am fine. I will keep this conversation between us, as I know General Hux would not be pleased by it."

He couldn't see her face under the helmet, but her body stiffened visibly at his words.

"I know all about you and Hux," Ren admitted slyly. "I think everyone in the First Order knows, or at least suspects. It's not like you two are quiet."

Kylo Ren smirked beneath his mask, knowing that he had embarrassed her.

"You can do better, you know?" he added.

"Sure I can do better," she drawled sarcastically. "It's pretty funny to hear coming from you though. Are you really any better than Hux yourself?"

By this time they had made it to the command center. Kylo Ren began keying in the password to go inside. The door clicked and opened with a whoosh.

"No," he said simply. "I'm worse."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

General Hux was waiting for him in the command center, a holomap spread out before him. At his entrance, the General looked up in greeting.

"Kylo Ren, so good of you to finally join me," he sneered. "That girl Snoke sent you too much fun to leave?"

"I believe that my sex life is none of your business Hux," Ren spat. "Why is it that you felt the need to call me down here at this hour? I don't exactly have time for petty pissing contests with you."

Hux smirked before pointing to the holomap in front of him.

"We've identified the location of two Resistance bases, one of which we believe holds the remnants of General Organa's team. We've located one base on Coruscant, and what seems to be the Resistance's main base on Takodana.

For a moment, Ren couldn't breathe, though he tried not to let Hux see that there was a problem. Truthfully, he had known about the base on Takodana for some time. Rey was there, he could feel it through the Force. He had not shared this information with Hux, because he did not want to be forced to kill her.

Yes, she had left him. Yes, she had rejoined the Resistance, but neither of those truths made the task of killing her any more palpable to him. He played his dread off with surprise, hoping to fool the General.

"Takodana?" he asked skeptically. "We about burned that place to the ground. Why would the Resistance choose to return there? What is left for them?"

"Precisely, Commander," Hux drawled. "That's what they want you to think. They've rebuilt from the ground up, and there is now a viable Resistance base there."

"Interesting…" Kylo Ren said thoughtfully.

"We're planning an attack on both bases, mere minutes apart. We're going to use a smoke and mirrors tactic, where one team will hit the Coruscant base, and in the confusion another team will hit the base on Takodana."

"A clever strategy General," Kylo Ren conceded.

"I will lead one team and you will lead the other," Hux continued. "Would you prefer to lead the Coruscant team or the Takodana team?"

Kylo Ren gave it thought. Rey was on Takodana. If he went to Takodana, he would be forced to kill her, and he would succeed. If Hux went to Takodana, he might kill her, or she might best him and get away. The choice was clear to him.

"I'll take the Coruscant team," he said slowly, his voice sounding cold and mechanical beneath his mask. "You take Takodana."

"You would let me have all the glory in taking down the Resistance home base?" Hux asked skeptically. "I assumed that since you missed the last home base strike, that you would want this one."

Ren looked into General Hux's smug face and knew that he was being tested.

"I have already destroyed Takodana once," he replied carefully. "I have no desire to do so again."

Hux nodded, though he could still see suspicion in the General's eyes.

"Very well then. I will prepare our strike teams. Be ready to move out in a few days time."

"I am always ready General," Ren scoffed. "And see to it that you don't disturb me at this hour again, or next time you won't find me in such a good mood."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"You suck at betting," Jessika said bluntly, laughing as she took Poe's last credits. She was wearing a skin-tight Resistance jacket, and her dark hair fell down her back in perfect waves. Finn didn't fail to notice the way Poe looked her up and down, almost as though she was the last woman he would ever see.

"You have to be cheating somehow!" Poe protested. "No one is that good at choosing the winner of every single pod race."

"You only lose because you choose all of the Hutt's relatives to win. They're all terrible. Haven't you figured that out by now? Your mom races better than those guys."

"I resent you bringing my mother into this," Poe frowned. "She's a nice lady."

"You two fight like an old married couple," Finn grunted. "And I'm really starting to feel like the third wheel."

"Don't worry about that," Jessika flashed him a grin. "I'm leaving so you boys can hang out for awhile."

She gave Poe a quick kiss and a wink, before heading out, leaving him and Finn alone together in the Resistance's bar. Poe ordered them another round of drinks, passing Poe a glass of whiskey.

"You all ready to go for tomorrow?" Finn asked him as he took a drink.

"I think so. Ready as I'll ever be. Keep and eye out for the First Order after I leave. Some of our guys on Coruscant sent me an encoded message saying that they had seen a First Order drone hanging around their camp a few days ago. They're afraid the First Order is going to move on them soon, and they have every right to be. We've lost five different bases over the last six weeks. Completely annihilated. No one made it out. Kylo Ren saw to that personally. The bastard's relentless. He's led every single attack and slaughtered our fighters like dogs."

"Rey claims they have some kind of bond through the Force," Finn said slowly, as though he was very tired. "No doubt he knows where we are. Why has he not come for us? Unless Rey is right about him it doesn't make any sense."

Poe shrugged nonchalantly. "We did a pretty good job of hiding the place, and who knows if all that stuff about Force bonds is even true. I like Rey, but she's different now, and I don't trust her."

He eyed Finn for a moment before continuing.

"I've been meaning to ask you this," Poe ventured cautiously. "But do you think Kylo Ren's controlling her mind somehow? Or do you think she sincerely wants to find him? I'm a little bit concerned for the security of our base if he's been getting in her mind."

"I don't understand why, but I think she really wants to go look for him," Finn sighed. "She keeps telling me about this bond that they have through the Force. I can't compete with that Poe. I'm losing her to that bastard because I'm not 'Force sensitive'." He used his fingers to add quotation marks to the words as though he didn't quite take the term seriously.

"Have you told her how you feel?" Poe questioned.

"No," Finn said reluctantly. "I want to, I really do. It's just that she keeps talking about Kylo Ren. I mean, the way she talks about him… I think she might be in love with him, Poe. It kills me. All I want is for her to be happy, but she doesn't want to be here. Even if I told her how I felt, I don't think it would matter. She doesn't feel the same way."

He frowned as he took a drink of his whiskey, then on second consideration, he downed the whole glass and gestured for another.

"You never know until you ask her," Poe pointed out. "Tell her how you feel. Ask her about her relationship with Kylo Ren. Lay all the cards out on the table, and if she still doesn't choose you, then at least you tried."

Finn sighed. "I guess you're right. The worst she could do is say that she's not interested, and my life wouldn't be any different than it is now."

"Just go talk to her. Either you can be together, or you can get closure and move on."

Poe took a drink of his own whiskey before becoming more serious.

"I never told you this, but Jessika liked you first," he snorted.

"Huh?"

"Yeah," Poe admitted. "She liked you for awhile, but she knew she couldn't compete as long was Rey was around. That's how she ended up with me. You would have been her first choice though."

"I'm sorry," Finn apologized. "I didn't know."

"Don't be sorry," Poe said flatly. "Jessika's hot, and besides, she's over you now and very much into me. I guess I have Rey to thank for that, so do me a favor and go talk to her. I'm tired of you moping."

Finn took one last drink of his whiskey and stood up to leave.

"Thanks buddy."

Poe slapped him on the back good-naturedly, and grinned at him.

"Don't mention it. Now stop talking to my dumb ass and go get your girl."

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Rey packed what few possessions she had carefully, hiding her pack under the bed in case she was interrupted.

Over the past few days she had spent all of her time planning, and with the planning she had found a purpose. She would leave this place today with or without permission from the Resistance.

She dressed in her gray clothes from Jakku, and tied her hair back in her customary three-bun style. They had taken her lightsaber the day they escaped Hoth. When she woke up and asked about, they had claimed it was only temporary, but she did not have her weapon. That would change today.

Rey had been nice about everything, doing as they told her, playing by their rules, but something within her had finally snapped. She remembered Ren's words to her on Hoth, and they rang more true to her now than they ever had.

 _You always have a choice, even if someone tells you that you don't. You can choose to obey, or not to obey, either way you're making a choice._

She had finally made a choice that was completely hers. She did not want to hurt anyone, and she sincerely hoped that it would not come to that, but even if it did, she intended to see her choice through. She would steal a fighter, kill whoever got in her way, and she would leave. She would leave and she would find Kylo Ren, of that she was determined.

Rey was about to grab her things and leave when she heard a knock on the door.

"Who is it?" she called out hesitantly. The clock near her bed read midnight, and she didn't know who would be by at this hour.

"It's Finn," the voice on the other side of the door sounded out. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah, sure," Rey answered uncertainly, opening the door to let him in.

When Finn stepped inside, she was surprised by what she saw. He seemed nervous, very nervous. His hands were shaking slightly and he bit his bottom lip as he looked at her.

"What's wrong?" Rey asked immediately, becoming concerned.

"Nothing's wrong," Finn began uncertainly. "I just need to talk to you about something."

"Well what is it?" Rey queried impatiently. She didn't exactly have time to play twenty questions with Finn right now.

Finn swallowed nervously, shifting from one foot to the other. "I like you Rey," he began unsteadily. "As more than a friend."

Rey felt her blood run cold with his confession. She had suspected that Finn had feelings for her some time ago, but it was one thing to suspect and another to know. Knowing meant that she would have to give him an answer.

"Finn, I don't… You're a great friend, but I don't feel that way about you," she told him honestly.

"It's because of him isn't it?" Finn questioned bitterly. "All you want to do is go find _him._ Well what happens when you do Rey? Kylo Ren is gone! He killed General Organa, his own mother. He went back to the First Order. He's slaughtering our fighters left and right. If he truly thinks that you left him like you said, what do you think he's going to do when you find him? He's probably going to kill you Rey!"

"I don't know Finn, but I have to try."

"Why?" he asked. "Why do you have to find him? Why do you care? You spent a week surviving on Hoth with him. I get it. You had each other's backs in a tough situation, but why can't you let him go now?"

"I told you Finn, we have some kind of bond through the Force. I see him and feel him all the time. I have no control over it, it just is."

"You didn't answer my question," Finn interrupted. "I know I don't understand the Force. I never will, but forget the Force for just a minute. Forget all about this weird bond you share with Kylo Ren. Think about what kind of man he is. He's not a good man at all Rey. He's evil and twisted by power."

"There's more to him than what you've seen," she argued.

"Is there?" he countered. "It seems pretty clear cut to me. You spend a week in a cave with the guy, and you magically forget all of the horrible things he's done, because of the Force. The damn Force. It's nothing but a mystical power that may or may not even exist! I'm right here Rey! And I'm a better man than Kylo Ren could ever hope to be! Do yourself a favor and forget about him!"

"The Force exists," Rey said sullenly. "And believe me, I've tried to forget him. I can't. He's a part of me now. I don't expect you to understand, but I have to find him."

Finn moved to her until he we mere inches from her face. He tilted her chin up with one hand until she was looking him in the eyes. His expression softened at the sight of her tears, but he remained resolute.

"Look at me Rey," he commanded. "I care about you and I want you to be happy, but I also want what's best for you. If you can look me in the eyes and tell me that you're in love with Kylo Ren I'll help you find him, but you better be honest with me. Don't just do this for me, do it for yourself too."

Rey looked at him, taking in the kindness in his eyes. Finn was a good man and a good friend, but she didn't have feelings for him. She knew that she had feelings for Ren, but she had never labeled it as love, at least not until now.

She thought of his handsome lopsided grin, and the mischievous glint in his eye when he teased her. She remembered how his lips felt on hers, and how good his body felt on top of her. She remembered the way he had come back for her, and his promise to never take another. Rey had know him, the _real_ him, in a way that no one else had. She paused for only a second before her answer came to her, as sure as anything she had ever known.

"I'm in love with Kylo Ren," she said firmly.

Finn looked defeated, but he swallowed his hurt before she could see much of it. "Okay then," he nodded reluctantly, letting her go. "I don't understand it, but if you love him, I'll help you."

"I do love him," she admitted, her voice almost a whisper. "Thank you Finn."

He nodded once again. "We have reason to suspect that Kylo Ren will be on Coruscant sometime in the next few weeks. One of our guys at the Coruscant base saw a First Order drone scoping them out. They suspect an attack is imminent, and Kylo Ren has personally led every single attack on our bases as of late. Bad for our people, but an easy predictor of where he's going to be. I'll get your lightsaber and an X-wing loaded up and ready for you. I'll tell our guys in Coruscant that you're headed their way. You can leave as early as tomorrow if you want."

"Thank you Finn," she said gratefully, giving her friend a hug. "Thank you so much."

"Just promise me you'll be careful Rey," he cautioned. "And please don't make me regret this."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The tie fighter that carried Kylo Ren hurtled through space at breakneck speed towards Coruscant. They would be there in a matter of days, and the current Resistance base would soon be no more.

Kylo Ren could feel the dark side of the Force flowing through him. He needed to unleash all of the hate and anger he had built up inside of him. He needed to kill. He could taste victory before the battle even started, and the blood of his enemies would quell his anger, at least for a little while.

He adjusted the hood of his cloak over his mask and his chest tightened involuntarily as he thought of Rey, the sting of her betrayal physically painful to him.

There would never be another, and he would die hating her for not loving him. He could only hope that his death would come soon.

His comm device lit up to indicate an incoming call, and he activated it without any thought. The image of Supreme Leader Snoke appeared before him, tall and shriveled.

"Kylo Ren," Snoke greeted. "I have news for you."

"Yes Supreme Leader," he replied automatically.

"The scavenger girl called Rey has been spotted at the Resistance base on Coruscant."

His brows shot up at the news, for he had last felt her presence on Takodana. He was glad for his mask, knowing that Snoke could not see his shock.

"Is that so?" he asked dully.

"It is indeed so," Snoke responded firmly. "Your mission is to find her and kill her. Bring her body to me as proof of your loyalty."

Ren felt as though he was being crushed. For a moment he couldn't breathe. His chest tightened, and he felt as though someone had plunged a knife into his gut.

"Yes Supreme Leader," he clipped mechanically, though his voice sounded slightly unsteady, even to him.

"Is there a problem with my request Kylo Ren?" Snoke asked curiously.

"No Supreme Leader. There is no problem," he answered automatically.

"Good. I expect it to be done. Don't disappoint me again Kylo Ren."

With that Snoke cut the connection, leaving Ren reeling at what would have to be done.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey could feel the energy in the base as she ate her dinner. Kylo Ren's cloak wrapped around her as usual. The hall was buzzing with activity, Resistance fighters gearing up for a possible attack. The Force around her was unstable, like a spring storm waiting to strike.

If Kylo Ren was truly coming to Coruscant, then Rey knew that most of these fighters would die. They were good, but they were no match for Ren.

Just thinking of him made her heart flutter with anticipation. She was nervous about seeing him again, so nervous that she had thrown up every single day she had been here. She didn't know how he would react, and that comprised the majority of her apprehension. Would he be glad to see her, or would he be furious with her? She didn't know. Rey was contemplating this when _it_ happened.

People started shouting and running towards the main entrance of the base as the back half exploded into flames. Rey was thrown from her seat as the building shook from the impact.

She heard the sound of tie fighters screaming overhead, followed by the noise of X-wings taking off. She heard shots fired all around, and she quickly jumped up from the floor and ignited her lightsaber, he food forgotten.

Stormtroopers poured in through the main entrance like cockroaches, finding and taking down all Resistance fighters in their path. She saw the Resistance fighters doing their best to hold the stormtroopers back, but the sheer numbers belonged to the First Order.

Rey easily cut down the stormtroopers that got too close to her as she looked for him, but most seemed reluctant to come near her lightsaber. She moved towards the fight, ready to help, when she finally saw him.

Kylo Ren was dressed in all black and he wore his mask again. His crimson blade was out front, and he expertly cut down fighter after fighter, hacking them into pieces with no thought. For a moment Rey was taken back to that night on Starkiller base when she fought him in the snow. A shiver went down her spine as she remembered how ruthless he could be.

She shook the thoughts away, forcing herself to remember him as he was on Hoth. As Ren, who protected her, and as the man she loved very dearly. Kylo Ren cut down two more fighters before Rey found the courage to speak.

"Ren!" she called out.

The mask whipped around to look at her, and he paused for a moment, as though unsure of his next move.

She felt him through the Force even before he moved. Anger, hurt, and a resigned sense of dread.

He ran for her lightsaber in hand, and Rey did the only thing she could think of. She ran.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Finn sat forlornly at the control panels sipping on a beer. To say he was bored would be an understatement. Sure, he kept busy enough making sure the base was running and everyone was doing what they were supposed to do, but truthfully he felt more alone than he ever had.

Poe and Jessika were gone, and had been gone for nearly a week. They had taken the Millennium Falcon, along with BB-8 and R2-D2, so they could access their holomaps. They had even taken C-3PO, much to Poe's anguish, but the droid had insisted on going to see "Master Luke," and Jessika didn't have the heart to tell him no.

Rey was gone too, having left out the day after Poe. Finn regretted letting her go, but what choice did he have? She had been miserable here, and who was he to keep her from being happy? Even if that happiness meant a life with a man who could never be worthy of her, who was he to tell her she was wrong?

Their absences stung, and he was beginning to see why Poe wanted to leave. Being in charge was no fun at all. Just today he had settled three arguments, decided on two First Order strikes, talked to some of the most boring people he had ever met over the comm link, and sat in a chair, watching blips on a screen for ten hours. It sucked, and he was over it.

The control console next to him lit up, and a beeping noise sounded out. Finn checked the screen, surprised to find a message from the Resistance base on Coruscant. He ran the message through their encryption system, and he immediately feared for Rey when he saw the contents.

 _Base on Coruscant compromised. Kylo Ren and First Order are here. Any survivors are departing now. Godspeed command._

Finn found himself holding his breath as he read the message, hoping that Rey was safe, and that some of their fighters could make it out alive. Even prepared for attack, they had still been no match for the sheer numbers of the First Order.

He glanced at the radar again, only to see it covered in blinking dots.

"What the…"

Before he had time to take any action, the lights flickered and then went out. Finn barely had time to register surprise before the back half of the base went up in flames. The impact of the explosion jarred him, and he held on to the control console to avoid falling down.

The Resistance fighters on the base ran past him, headed for the main entrance, intending to escape the flames.

"No!" Finn shouted. "It's a trap!"

Blaster shots rang out, and the Resistance fighters started to fall. Finn tried to run to them, but it was already too late. Dozens of men and women of the Resistance lay dying and stormtroopers were already pouring in through the entrance. They had been taken by surprise, and this was one battle that they wouldn't win.

Finn watched the stormtroopers pour in with trepidation, and was surprised to see General Hux among them. The General caught sight of him and grinned.

"FN-2187," he greeted. "So we meet again."

"General Hux," Finn growled.

A stormtrooper stepped towards him, blaster raised, but Hux stopped him with a gesture.

"I'll take care of this one," he said simply as he stepped towards Finn.

"You betrayed us, FN-2187. I certainly hope that the Resistance has been good to you and that it was worth it."

Hux removed his cloak, letting it fall to the floor. He removed his gloves as well, and pushed his sleeves back one at a time. His red hair fell messily over his face, and he smirked at Finn arrogantly.

"Normally traitors of the First Order are punished harshly, or even sentenced to death, but for you I'll make an exception. Let's settle this like men. No blasters, no friends, just you and me. What do you say FN-2187?"

Finn closed the distance between them until they were almost nose-to-nose. His chocolate eyes bored into Hux's blue ones, accepting his challenge with fervor.

"Yeah that sounds good," he agreed. "And my name's Finn."

0000000000000

Finn threw a punch at Hux's face, which he caught. Finn caught the General off guard by punching with his other fist. He made contact with Hux's face, causing him to stagger back.

Finn took advantage and hit him again, driving him back further. Hux threw a punch, catching Finn squarely on the jaw. It hurt worse than any punch he'd ever taken, and his jaw seared with pain.

Hux came at him again and landed another punch to the side of his head. Finn could see stars with the impact, and for a moment he feared that he would black out.

He and Hux took turns throwing punches and missing, both blocking and dodging the hits. Finn faked him out, bringing one fist forward, then hitting him squarely in the nose as he tried to block.

Blood splattered everywhere, and Hux fell, holding his nose in pain. Finn was about to finish him, when his legs were kicked out from under him. He fell to the ground and Hux was on him, wailing away at his face.

Finn turned sideways to avoid the General's fists, when he saw it. The button. He knew that he was going to die today. Even if he managed to beat Hux, he would still be executed, so he did the only thing that he knew to do.

Finn pushed Hux off of him, sending the General sprawling on the floor. He rolled over, and underneath the command center console, striking the button with his fist.

A loud ringing noise sounded out in the base, and Hux met his eyes, confusion written on his face.

"Surprise motherfucker," Finn grinned.

Hux's eyes widened in a moment of understanding, and the whole base went up in flames.

000000000000

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey ran faster than she had ever ran in her life. She took the back door out of the base, sending stormtroopers flying with a Force push. She ran out into the streets of Coruscant, barely missing a passing speeder. The driver yelled at her, but she never stopped.

She ran into a building across the street, hoping to lose him. Inside, neon lights flashed and exotic women from across the galaxy danced erotically. The place was packed with more races and species than she had ever seen in one room.

Rey pulled the hood of Kylo Ren's cloak up and over her face, hoping to hide and not draw any undue attention to herself in the crowd. She could feel him behind her, searching for her, and she knew that he could feel her too.

She headed upstairs, weaving in and out of the crowd. Below, she could hear screaming, and knew that Ren's patience had worn thin. Rey felt him coming up the stairs after her, and she ran for the nearest window.

The glass shattered as she jumped, and she used the Force to soften her fall as she landed in the alleyway behind the club. Once she landed, she turned to see Kylo Ren standing at the window, looking down at her.

She had hoped he would let her go, but her hopes were dashed as he jumped, and she immediately started running again.

Rey heard the thud as he landed and she could feel him chasing her once again. She ran down the streets of Coruscant, dodging speeders and shady streetwalkers. She ran block after block, passing businesses, clubs, and bars.

She was getting tired. She could feel her legs giving out and her lungs burning, but still she ran.

Kylo Ren chased her, staying hot on her heels like a pack of wolves. He was fast and he was relentless. If he caught her, she knew that he would kill her.

Rey tried to send her thoughts to him through the Force, but he blocked her out, unwilling to listen, so she just kept running.

She ran down an alleyway, and let out a shriek of fear when she saw her path was blocked by a twelve-foot chain link fence. She jumped to climb it, but was knocked back by a powerful shock. She fell to the ground, tired and panting. She could feel tears beginning to spill from her eyes.

Rey heard footsteps approach, and she scrambled off the ground and ignited her lightsaber. She saw Kylo Ren approaching her. His lightsaber was also drawn, and his mask stared at her menacingly.

He moved quickly then, swinging his blade at her. She blocked with her own blade, and danced away from him as he came at her again. He struck and she blocked, time after time.

Tears streaked down Rey's face as she blocked blow after blow. She could tell by the way that he swung that he didn't really want this, so she tried to appeal to that part of him by only blocking his strikes, nothing more.

"Fight me," he commanded her.

Rey said nothing, only tried to hold back her tears, and failed miserably. She did not want to fight him. Not now, and not ever.

She blocked his strike once more, their red and blue blades crossed between them. Ren leaned in towards her and spoke, his voice almost a whisper.

"Take your lightsaber and run it through me," he commanded. "Strike me down."

Rey shook her head in shock. "No. I won't."

"You have already wounded me so deeply that I will never recover. You would be doing me a favor by taking my life. Now strike me down and run."

"No."

Rey deactivated her lightsaber and threw it away from her. She had no desire to hurt him, and she needed him to understand that.

"If you will not strike me down, then I must take your life. There is no other option. Do you understand?" he clipped, his mechanical voice strange to her. He held his lightsaber at her throat, though he did not kill her immediately. He paused as though gathering the courage to swing through.

"I once knew a man who I hated at first," Rey said slowly, fighting through her tears. "But we spent some time together, and I realized that I didn't hate quite as much as I thought. In fact, I grew to care for him very much. He told me something once that I'll never forget. He told me that no matter what anyone tells you, you always have a choice. I've come to realize that he was right. Our lives are our own, Kylo Ren. You can choose to kill me, or you can choose to let me live. Either way, you have to make a choice, and that choice is yours and yours alone."

"I don't truly have a choice in this matter," he said tightly. "Supreme Leader Snoke has commanded your death. I must obey, or die at his hands."

"Then if you're going to kill me, at least have the decency to let me see your face," she growled. "I want to see your eyes when you strike me down."

Kylo Ren paused, as if unsure, then deactivated his lightsaber and began to remove his mask. There was a loud pop and hiss as he took the mask off, and when he removed it from his face Rey gasped at what she saw.

He looked terrible. His face was pale and gaunt. Dark circles pooled under his eyes as though he had not slept in weeks. His dark eyes were dull and lifeless, devoid of the mischievous gleam that she had come to love. He was a different person than she remembered, though her feelings for him were not any less.

"You like what you see?" he snorted. "You've destroyed me Rey. You've accomplished what every single person in the galaxy has only dared to dream of. You've brought me to my knees, and you don't even have the decency to deliver a finishing blow. My only hope now is to die in battle with honor, and I hope for a swift death with everything that I am. You made me love you, Rey, and then you left me. So, I'm going to kill you. Perhaps your death will give me some respite from the nightmare that I live in."

"Ren, it's not like that. You don't understand."

"You made a promise to me, and you left me to be with your Resistance friends. I think I understand perfectly," he growled.

He moved the lightsaber to her throat once again, and pressed his forehead against hers in one final gesture of affection.

"Are you going to let me talk?" Rey spat. "Don't I at least get some last words before you kill me?"

He grunted in irritation, so she continued without hesitation.

"You're too stubborn and proud for your own damn good, so I'm going to make this as short and simple as I can for you. I love you Kylo Ren. I've loved you since Hoth, and I will always love you."

Before he had a chance to argue, she pressed her lips hard against his, and sent her thoughts to him through the Force, praying that he would understand.

 **So I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! For those of you that didn't read the character deaths, let me give you the quick "everyone lives" alternate version:**

 **Finn and Hux get in a fight. Then, just as they're about to destroy each other, they realize that it's not worth it. They both hate Kylo Ren, so they decide to be friends. They fake their own deaths, and move to Tattooine, where they start a rave club together. Finn gets all the girls, and Hux makes the occasional call to Phasma for epic phone sex. BOOM! Everyone lives.**

 **For those of you that did read the whole thing, the decision to kill them off was difficult but necessary. I really love Finn, and I secretly think that Hux would probably be pretty fun out of uniform. I've been looking for some good fics to read for both of them, but most of the fics on here write them as gay, and I'm really not into that. If you guys know of any good ones of Finn or Hux (where they're straight) please let me know! There's plenty out there of Kylo Ren and Rey, but there seems to be a shortage on fics for those guys.**

 **Anyways! I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please take the time to let me know what you think! I appreciate it, and your comments inspire me to write faster! Hope you all have a great week! Lots of love!**

 **-Boss**


	5. Of Monsters and Men

**Hi everyone! Hope you are all enjoying the story so far! I would like to thank everyone who has favorited, followed, and especially those who have taken the time to review this story! The feedback I have received has been incredible! I apologize for the delay in posting. I had to give a lot of thought to where I wanted to take this story. There were several options I could have gone with, and I chose the one that I believe will best benefit my story as far as character development and how I want it to end is concerned. Will you like it? I don't know. I'm (unfortunately) not a Jedi, and can't read minds, but I certainly hope that you will enjoy the path I've chosen for this story.**

 **With that being said, this chapter is written a little differently than my others. There is some passage of time, and I did not wish to bore you (or myself), so I hit the highlights and moved on. I tried to smooth it over as best I could, but I apologize if some it comes off a little jumpy. I was also recovering from a concussion as I was writing this, so if you see something that I messed up on please let me know. My brain was not wanting to cooperate with me for the majority of this chapter, so getting it right was a bit of a struggle this time around.**

 **Moving on…**

 **I would like to give a shout out to Sakifan 595, HornedGoddess, JuliaAurelia, Azera-v, Aleta Wolff, 5289belle, Breab, starwars12, Sam, SaintsFan1, ShortySC22, fanficaddict14, CountessR, Mitil Tenten, Nami Swannn, Shann9513, Reykenobi, CrystalK98, and the unnamed guests who reviewed this story! You guys are fantastic and give me the inspiration to keep writing! Thank you CountessR for making me feel like I'm not crazy! Glad to hear there are other people out there that like to have fun! Life is way too short to take everything (or much of anything) seriously. Sorry, but not sorry about the cliffhanger. It's just something I do when I write, and I can't help myself : ) I'm not afraid to kill anyone off either, and I consider that a strength as a writer. Sometimes if you love them, you just gotta let 'em go. On Finn and Poe.. Maybe I missed something, but I took from the movie that they were just really good friends, so that's how I chose to portray them. Also, you asked for Millicent the cat… You got her! I have included Millicent in this chapter, along with a brief appearance of Zack and Tim from the SNL skit for your amusement. Obviously I don't own any of the epic characters in this story, and if I did, I would be swimming in my pool full of jello instead of writing this. Just being real with you guys.**

 **Anyways, without further ado, here's the next chapter! Enjoy!**

Chapter 5: Of Monsters and Men

 _I'd rather tell you how I ruled the world and never stopped, but this heart of mine is shaking like a spinning top, and as it slows all my sins have caught the last of me._

 _That reflection in the water tells a story, true, but it's the last thing you want staring back at you, and wrinkled hands weak from plunder barely stir this away._

 _There were years where our faces stayed in front of us. There were moments we forgot what this really was, but the death of a memory is the death we carry._

 _-Emery_

Rey pressed her lips to his and Kylo Ren lost himself. Her taste was intoxicating, and as his lips remembered the familiar shape of hers, he found himself kissing her back hungrily, desperate to taste her and feel her as if this time would be the last.

He dropped his lightsaber, no longer caring what would become of him, and pulled her into his arms. Her body felt good against his, and he realized with a pang of sadness how much he had truly missed this. She was everything he was not, and he craved her touch like a drowning man craves the very air that so many take for granted. She was his drug, the last bit of light that was left in him, and the only woman he would ever love.

He kissed her hard and passionately, and he felt himself slip away as the two of them melded together through the Force. Her memories and thoughts intermixed with his, and finally he understood. She had not left him by choice, and he felt a fool for not going after her. He had wasted so much time that he could have shared with her, feeling sorry for himself.

Rey truly loved him. He could see that now, and his heart skipped a beat at that revelation. He had been so close to killing her, so close that it made him sick. She was his, and he was never going to let her go again. When they broke the kiss to come up for air, he pulled her tightly against chest, terrified of letting her go lest he lose her again. He buried his face in her hair, breathing in deeply, desperately trying to memorize her very scent.

"I thought that you left me," Ren said breathlessly. "But now you're here and I… There's so much I want to do and say to you."

"Then do and say it all," Rey replied, holding on to him tightly. "I'm not going anywhere."

"That could prove to be problematic," he remarked dryly. "Snoke has commanded me to bring him your body as proof of my loyalty to the First Order. _Obviously_ that won't be happening, so I have to run. Snoke's going to want me dead."

"Then I'm going with you," Rey said immediately.

"It's not going to be safe for you. We'll always be looking over our shoulders. There will always be a chance the First Order could come for me. I'm a dead man now."

"I'm in this with you," Rey snapped. "If we run, we run together, and if we die, we die together too. I'm not leaving you."

Kylo Ren pulled away from her so that he could look her in the eyes. Her hazel eyes blazed with an unquenchable fire, and for a moment he found himself unable to think of anything but the way her body felt under his, all fire and passion as she gave herself to him.

"If you run with me there will be no going back," he told her seriously. "Are you sure that this is what you want?"

"I think I'm old enough to make my own decisions, Kylo Ren," she chided him. "I'm coming with you whether you like it or not, so you might as well get used to having me around."

"I could get very used to having you around," he grinned, his voice dripping with the insatiable hunger he felt for her.

"So it's settled," she remarked. "Where do we go? How can we escape without Snoke noticing?"

"The First Order needs to think I'm dead," he said matter-of-factly. "I think I can arrange that. We will also need to find someone who can make us disappear, and I think I know who we can talk to."

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"So let me get this straight," the Twi'lek drawled, looking them over dubiously. "You, Kylo Ren, are the most feared man in the entire galaxy, and you want me to help you disappear? Are you fucking crazy?"

"Best watch your tongue Twi'lek before I cut it out," Ren growled.

"My name is Vera," she corrected. "And I suppose it's safe to assume that your parents neglected to teach you any manners."

"Vera," Rey interrupted, giving Kylo Ren a glare. "I apologize for Ren's behavior, but we're in a tough spot and we could really use your help. Can you please help us?"

The Twi'lek looked from Ren to Rey, and then back to Ren again with a scowl on her face.

"I'll do this, but I'm not doing it for you," she said firmly, jutting a finger in Kylo Ren's direction. "I'm doing it for her." Her eyes traveled back to Rey once again, giving her a sad look of camaraderie. "Because for some reason I'll never understand, this poor girl loves you enough to die for you. And I'm doing this for Han Solo too. Your father was a good man, and I liked him a lot. It's gonna cost you though. Hiding _you_ won't be easy."

"I understand," Kylo Ren nodded. "Thank you for helping us."

"You can thank me by getting the hell out of Coruscant as soon as your paperwork is done. I don't want any trouble from the First Order."

They agreed on a price, which Ren paid in full. Vera took photos of them both and began to fabricate their paperwork. The process would take several days, and until the paperwork was complete, they would stay in an underground bunker that Vera owned. It was small, with only a shower, a sink, and a bed, but it was the most welcome sight either of them had seen in months.

"Do you think they'll buy that you're dead?" Rey asked him as they sat down on the small bed together.

"I don't know," he replied honestly. "I destroyed the belt that had the tracking device in it, and I left the mask inside of the building before we burned it. I hope they buy it. That was the best I could do aside from actually dying."

"What if it's not enough," Rey asked. "You were his apprentice. Surely Snoke wouldn't write you off that easily"

"Then we hope that our new identities will hide us, and we do our best not to draw any attention to ourselves."

"You could kill me you know," she said suddenly. "Take my body to Snoke. It would be the smart move for you."

Kylo Ren glared at her, his eyes narrowed and lips pursed in obvious disgust at her suggestion.

"I'm not interested in the smart move," he replied evenly, the disgust evident in his tone. "I'm only interested in saving you."

Rey brought her hand up to his face, tracing the scar that she had given him lightly with her forefinger. It was not the first time that she wished she had not marred him. His dark eyes followed hers, understanding her thoughts and communicating with their softness that he was not angry, and would never be angry with her for his disfigurement. He sighed deeply and closed his eyes as her fingers found their way down his jaw and into his dark curls.

"I used to think you were all darkness," she said quietly. "The pure embodiment of evil, but there is light in you even if you think there isn't. I've seen it. The way you tried to save Leia on Hoth. The way you came back for me. Even the way you're protecting me now. You're not all bad Kylo Ren."

His eyes fluttered open, and he met her gaze with a smoldering intensity that she had only seen a few times before when they were on Hoth.

"The only light I have exists because of you," he pointed out.

His thoughts hurtled to her, as he was unable to put them into words, and Rey found herself wanting him more than ever in that moment. _You are my light. You are all that is good in me. All that I have to offer you is darkness._

 _Even if darkness was all that you had to offer me,_ she thought back to him. _I would still take it gladly. In that way we balance each other out, the light and the dark, together we are stronger than either one of us alone._

Rey looked up at him and saw his dark eyes burning with desire as he pressed his lips to hers hungrily, unable to control himself any longer. She ran her hands through his curls, enjoying their softness, as his tongue sought entrance to her mouth. She allowed it, battling with him for control as they kissed passionately.

Ren threw his leg over her, straddling her on the edge of the small bed. Rey touched him playfully, and laughed as his breathing hitched at the contact. He became hard beneath her touch, and her need for him only intensified.

"Don't start something you don't intend to finish," he growled playfully.

"Well…" Rey teased. "I was hoping to get a shower first…"

Kylo Ren gave her the lopsided, mischievous grin that she had come to love.

"That can be arranged," he smirked.

Rey gave an undignified squeal as he scooped her into his arms and carried her bridal style over to the shower in their bunker. He helped her undress, tossing her clothes haphazardly in a pile across the room. Ren turned on the shower and began removing his own clothes as Rey stepped inside, sighing as the hot water ran over her skin.

She took the bar of soap provided, and began washing off, noting the way that Kylo Ren's eyes wandered over her body hungrily. A few moments later he stepped in with her, his body completely bared to her eyes.

Rey looked over him with approval, having almost forgotten how attractive and masculine he was beneath his clothing. His body was near perfection and she sighed with pleasure as she remembered what it had been like to have him inside of her.

"Miss me?" he teased, as he caught her approving glance.

"More than you'll ever know," she replied honestly, not in the mood to play coy. It had been far too long since they had been intimate, and she was more than ready to remedy that.

She took the soap and began washing his body, the feel of his hard muscle under her hands driving her mad. She washed his arms and chest, and then she went lower. Kylo Ren's eyes widened in surprise as she wrapped her hand around his length, and he lost control.

He grabbed her hips roughly and picked her up, bringing her back to rest against the tile behind her. Rey wrapped her legs around his waist playfully, and in one quick thrust he was in her.

She gasped at his entrance and Ren growled with pleasure. He moved slowly and purposefully, thrusting up in her over and over again. The warm water washed down Ren's back, and Rey snared her fingers in his curls as he moved.

His thoughts, memories, and fears became hers as the Force bonded them together. His love for her, the feral hunger that they shared, and rapid beat of his heart filled her as he thrust into her. She felt herself going over the edge into orgasm, and moaned his name. He thrust into one last time, growling with pleasure as he finished inside of her. He pulled her into his arms then, and kissed her softly.

As he held her, Rey was overcome with the rightness of it all. It felt good and it felt natural to be in his arms, almost as though their intimacy was never truly a choice, but something that had been predestined and would only feel right between the two of them.

Kylo Ren and Rey kissed for some time, enjoying the feel of their bodies together. They stayed that way until the water in the shower ran cold, and they were forced to get out. They dried off, and Ren picked her up once again and carried her to the small bed that had been provided for them. He laid her on the bed and then crawled in after her.

Rey laughed softly as he pulled her to him, and tangled his body with hers under the covers. She buried her face in his neck, and entwined her legs even more tightly around his. He allowed his body to relax around hers and planted a soft kiss in her hair.

"So what happens next?" Rey asked him tiredly.

"We sleep," he grunted. "And worry about the rest tomorrow. Our papers should be finished in a few days, and then we'll be leaving this place for somewhere we can call our own."

"Do you think we're destined to have a happy ending, or do you think this will end badly for us?" she whispered.

"We make our own destiny," he replied simply. "It's only as good as we want it to be."

Rey said no more, merely closing her eyes and enjoying the feel of his skin under hers. She matched the steady beat of his heart with her own, feeling them beat in unison, until sleep threatened to overcome her.

"I love you Rey," she heard Ren mumble as he kissed her forehead gently.

She smiled and whispered the words back right before she let sleep take her.

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Poe Dameron lay in the bunk next to Jessika, half asleep and spent from their activities. The soft beeping of droids was the only sound he heard besides the hum of the Millennium Falcon's engines. It was peaceful, and he felt at home on the ship.

They had left out almost a week ago to search for Luke Skywalker. According to their navigation system, they would spend months in hyperspace before they would be close enough to enter the planet's atmosphere.

Any normal person would cave under such confinement, but Poe and Jessika had an edge after years of flight as pilots. They were used to the confinement. For the two of them, there was a certain level of peace that came with plotting a course and zipping past thousands of star systems in a single trip. It was surreal and almost godlike in a way.

"Snoke aint got nothin' on me," he mumbled tiredly. "I'm king of the galaxy."

"That's great King Poe," Jessika snorted. "How about you use your kingly powers to make sure we're still on course."

"Anything for you m'lady," Poe grinned.

He rolled off of the bunk and pulled on his pants before heading to the cockpit of the Falcon. He checked the panels and gauges, making sure everything was as it should be. He was about to head back and climb into the bunk with Jessika again, when he noticed an incoming message on his tightbeam radio. He clicked the button to receive the message, and listened impatiently as it began to play.

"Fellow Resistance fighters," a voice boomed throughout the cockpit. "Please be on guard for any First Order drones or scouts. Be advised we have lost our bases on Coruscant and Takodana, both completely destroyed. I repeat, both completely destroyed by the First Order. At this time we are not aware of any survivors, but we will keep everyone updated when and if we receive new information."

The recording ended there, leaving Poe in shock. He was numb. That was the only way he could describe it. Finn, the others, the base, all gone.

He had left Finn in charge so he could fly around the galaxy and find Luke Skywalker. He should have been on Takodana, but he wasn't. Finn was dead because he had been unable to shoulder the responsibility of running the base. In an indirect way, _he_ was responsible for Finn's death.

Poe began to shake involuntarily, and he could feel tears threatening to spill over. He sunk down into the pilot's chair and he did the only thing that he could do. He wept for the very best friend that he had ever known.

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The newly promoted General Phasma sat on the bed in her new quarters and looked around. She had been commanded to take Hux's quarters along with his job title. She had brought a few of her belongings, but she had already decided that she was leaving his room as it was.

Everything was in order, his belongings straight and put away in symmetrical fashion, his books on First Order history and warfare alphabetized, and his furniture dust free, A photo of him in uniform with his family at his officer graduation sat on his bookshelf. His parents were dressed up, but exuded a very casual feel, along with his younger brother who was still in the academy at that time, and looked exactly like him. Only Hux stood straight, uniform pressed, and a tight grimace on his face as though it pained him to belong to such relaxed family.

Hux had been the epitome of order, in fact, the only thing in his room that spoke of disorder was a photo he had taken with her a few months after they started seeing each other. She picked it up off of his nightstand, and couldn't help the smile that spread across her face.

Hux was still in his uniform, but his usually perfect red hair was mussed and he was grinning like an idiot. His arm was wrapped tightly around her, and she leaned into him easily. That had been a good night and she could remember it like it was yesterday.

The two of them had just been released from duty, and he offered to buy her a drink. Normally the two of them would have a few drinks and then head back to one of their quarters, but Phasma had been in a playful mood that night. Eight shots of vodka each and several hours later they had found themselves in the employee break room laughing at all the employee photos that the stormtroopers and techs had "decorated." There was an amusing comment for almost every employee in the First Order, and she and Hux were not excluded from the fun.

Next to Phasma's photo, someone had taken a marker and written, "I shall enter Valhalla shiny and chrome!" Phasma couldn't ever remember laughing so hard in her life.

Next to Hux's photo, someone had written, "Do I hear you having fun? That's not allowed. Get back to work!" She had laughed at the likeness, but Hux was not amused. Phasma remembered taking the marker and adding to it. She had written "General Hux is incredibly good looking" under the photo. That had gotten a smile from him.

Hux had taken the marker from her, and in the spirit of the evening, had added a few comments of his own to the photos, much to Phasma's delight.

On Kylo Ren's photo he added the words "Crylo Ren," causing her to laugh uncontrollably. To her photo, he had simply added, "Captain Phasma is smoking hot," giving her a sly wink as he finished. Then there was Jimmy's photo, which he saved for last. Phasma knew that he hated his look-alike more than anyone would ever know. The man annoyed him to no end, and she had spent many hours laughing with him over Jimmy's escapades.

Hux had winked at her as he added to Jimmy's photo. He drew a mustache on the man's face, giggling like a kid as he did so. Then he added the comment "I wish I was as cool as General Hux" under the photo.

Phasma had laughed until she cried, leaning on Hux as she struggled to breathe. It was hilarious and so out of character for him, she had a hard time believing that the man that held her as she tried to catch her breath was the same austere general that she had come to know. He had kissed her softly, holding her until she could breathe again. His cheeks and ears had reddened with his usual lack of protocol, but the way his blue eyes lit up when he looked at her told her that he was truly enjoying himself.

She remembered having a passing stormtrooper take their photo together afterwards. Hux had not been pleased at having one of his subordinates see him behaving as he was, but he had kept and framed the photo all the same. That had been a good night. Every night she spent with him had been a good night.

As she held the photo in her hands, she realized with a start that she had been the disorder in his life. She was the only thing he had that was unorganized and lacked perfection. Obviously, he must have enjoyed the chaos she brought on some level, or he would not have continued seeing her. She was not sorry for turning his perfect life upside down, and she was not sorry for the time that they had spent together. She only regretted that it had ended so soon.

Phasma had known that this day would come, but she had never expected that it would hit her so hard. She had never considered her and Hux's relationship to be anything more than an officer's fling. She had never considered how deeply she had come to care for him before now. He was gone, and his loss ate at her heart in a way that she never expected.

"Bernard," she whispered softly, wishing that she could go back in time, if only just to call him by his first name before he died. He had wanted to call her Brienne numerous times, and she had shut him down. Now she regretted it.

A small noise caught her attention, and she turned to see Hux's cat, Millicent, heading towards her.

"Here Millie," she coaxed.

The orange tabby cat jumped up on the bed, and curled up beside Phasma, mewing at her. She stroked Millie behind the ears lovingly, and smiled a little as the cat began to purr.

"Guess you're my cat now Millie," she told her sadly.

Phasma put the photo of her and Hux back on the nightstand almost reverently. He was gone, and all she had to remember him was a handful of good memories and a cat. Life was a bitch sometimes.

"Perhaps the next life will be more kind to us, Bernard," she mumbled softly. "I will see you again, I promise. Just wait for me on the other side."

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"Can I open my eyes yet?" Rey asked irritably. "It's been half an hour and I feel like I'm going to trip and fall."

"I won't let you fall," Ren scoffed. "Have a little faith in me. We're almost there."

They took a few more steps before he stopped her abruptly. "We're here. You can open your eyes now."

Rey complied, her eyes widening as soon as they opened. Kylo Ren couldn't fight the grin that spread over his face as she stared in wonder.

"You said you wanted to go somewhere green," he smirked. "Welcome to Naboo."

In truth he had probably gone overboard, but it was so worth it for her reaction. He had bought a small plot of land next to a lake. It had taken almost every credit he possessed, but he had bought it. There was an existing stone house on the property that was small, but would provide adequate living space for the two of them. Wooded land bordered their property on all sides of the lake and everywhere the eye could see was lush and green. Yes, the shocked look on her face was well worth the effort for him.

"This is ours?" Rey asked slowly, shock and disbelief evident in her voice.

"All of it," he clipped. "Does it please you?"

"It's beautiful," she sighed. "I've never seen anything so beautiful before…"

"The house is kind of small," Ren admitted. "But I think it will be enough for the two of us. I've found a jobs for both of us so we can blend in as well. I found a repair job for you at a speeder shop in town. I figured you would approve."

She nodded and he continued.

"I was approached by a local farmer when I was buying this place. He offered me a job planting and working his fields for him. He's going to teach me everything he knows so I can farm here for us."

"It seems you've already taken care of everything," Rey grinned.

"Almost everything," Kylo Ren mused, his voice taking on a more serious tone. "The paperwork Vera gave me identifies us as Ben and Rey Callian."

"Okay, so I call you Ben now?" she queried.

"Yes," he responded quickly. "Kylo Ren is dead as far as anyone is concerned. I will live out the rest of my life, however long or short it may be, as Ben now."

He could feel the heat rising in his cheeks, and he bit his bottom lip nervously. He needed to ask something of her, and he was terrified to do so. Rey caught his nervous tic easily, and called him on it.

"There's something else?" she asked curiously. "I can tell something is bothering you. Have we been tracked here?"

"No."

"Then what is it? You can tell me."

"Nothing's wrong," he was quick to point out. "It's just that our paperwork says we're married." He could feel his cheeks on fire with embarrassment, and out of habit he averted his eyes, looking at the ground.

"So…" Rey began slowly, amusement in her tone. "Is that a problem? Do you not want to pretend that I'm your wife?"

"No, I don't," Ben replied immediately.

He could see the switch in her immediately, all amusement gone from her beautiful face. Instead, her hazel eyes shone with a deep hurt that he had not ever seen, nor wished to see again. Before she had a chance to respond, he continued.

"I don't want to have to pretend that you're my wife," he said slowly, his hands shaking slightly as he reached for hers. "It's not enough for me. If I call you my wife, I want it to be true. I don't want you to pretend to be my wife because some piece of paper says you are. I can lie and pretend on everything else in our new lives, but to pretend that you're my wife if that's not what you want would destroy me. I want you to _want_ this. I want you to choose me."

"I'm here with you. I've already chosen you," Rey countered, not quite understanding what he needed.

"Then choose me again," he said simply. "I need to know that you want this and that you're happy with me."

"I am," she assured him.

"Marry me, Rey," Ben said suddenly. He held her hands in his own tightly, and his dark eyes met hers with a smoldering passion that took her breath away. "Give yourself completely to me and only me. Be my wife for real, not just on paper."

Ben let one of her hands go free, and fished in his pocket until he found what he was looking for. He pulled out a small silver ring with a single diamond laid in it. It wasn't fancy, but it had sentimental value.

"This was my mom's," he told her as she eyed it, mouth agape. "I took it from her the day she died with the hope of one day giving it to you. When I thought you had left me, I kept it simply because it was hers. I want you to have it, but only if you want this, and only if you want _me_."

"I want this," Rey told him with surety. "And I want you, more than anything. I'll marry you, not because I feel like I have to, but because I want to. A life without you would be no life at all."

Rey leaned into him and pressed her lips against his. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her back softly, enjoying the feel of her against him. She was his by her own choosing. Despite the monster that he was, she loved him all the same.

"I love you Ben," she mumbled when they broke the kiss to come up for air.

That night as they made love by the lake, Ben thought of their future together, and he realized that he had never been more excited about anything in his life.

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They married several days later under a willow tree by the lake. There was nothing fancy about the wedding. Neither of them wanted a large affair. They had found a man to officiate in the nearest town where Rey worked, and there was no need for witnesses since they were already legally married.

Rey wore a simple cream colored, floor length dress that she had found in town. It hung off of her shoulders, showing a little more skin then what she was used to. Ben wore his black robes from when he had been Kylo Ren, his dark curls tamed away from his face.

Even with the scar she had given him, Ben was still devastatingly handsome. He said his vows to her, meaning every word of it, and Rey found herself loving him more than she could have thought possible. He had given himself completely to her, and she found a certain peace in the knowledge that he was hers and hers alone.

She said her vows to him, promising to love him, care for him, and stay faithful to him from this day forward. He gave her his lopsided grin that she had grown to love so much, never taking his eyes from her.

They finished their vows and he kissed her softly, running his hands through her hair slowly and almost reverently.

"I will never leave you," he whispered. "You are my wife now, and all that I am belongs to you. I will give you anything you want, Rey. Just ask and it's yours."

A shiver ran down her spine at his words, and she smiled at her new husband before pressing her lips to his ear and whispering back.

"I don't need to ask for anything, because you've already given me everything I could ever want."

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"General Phasma, I hope that you are settling into your new role," Snoke drawled slowly.

"Yes Supreme Leader," Phasma clipped. "It's difficult to fill Hux's shoes, but I'm doing the best I can."

"As I knew you would," he continued. "I wanted to inform you that I have promoted Jimmy to take the job of Captain."

"Jimmy," she asked skeptically. "You mean the guy from radar? The one that dresses like Hux?"

"That's the one," Snoke confirmed. "He's shown a lot of initiative lately, and I think that he will make a fine captain."

"Yes sir," Phasma consented without any real conviction. She was not pleased with the situation at all, and she believed that the Supreme Leader was making a mistake, but she was careful not to let her emotions get the best of her.

"I also need to discuss something else with you," Snoke said slowly.

Phasma cocked her helmet to the side curiously. Whatever it was, it was not likely to be something that she would enjoy.

"Yes Supreme Leader."

"I am not entirely pleased with the circumstances surrounding Kylo Ren's death," he began thoughtfully. "I have a hard time believing that the scavenger girl bested Ren in battle, and then escaped without a trace. He's stronger than her. He should have killed her easily. Even if his feelings for her got in the way and she killed him, she still should not have been able to slip away."

"Okay," Phasma said uncertainly.

"I believe that Kylo Ren has betrayed us and fled with the scavenger girl. He is hiding his Force signature from me, so I have been unable to pinpoint his location, but I believe that he is still alive."

"Treason is punishable by death," Phasma pointed out. "Do you really think that Ren would risk your wrath?"

"I do," Snoke admitted. "The boy has been unraveling for some time. I believe that his love for the scavenger girl has blinded him from reason. I need you to find him for me General."

"That will take some time," she cautioned. "If Kylo Ren truly wants to disappear, it will be very difficult to find him."

"I understand," he nodded. "And I have faith that you will locate him, given enough time."

"Yes sir," she affirmed. "But if you don't mind me asking, what will become of Kylo Ren?"

"I have no room in my ranks for traitors," Snoke growled. "Ren will die, but I intend to make him suffer first. I will kill his scavenger girl in front of him. I will make him watch as the life drains from her eyes, slowly and painfully. When she is dead, I will move on to him. By the time I am ready to kill him, he will be begging me for death. Find him. Bring him and the scavenger girl to me. I have faith in you General. Don't disappoint me."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"This is ridiculous," Ben snorted, kicking over his bucket of water, and spilling it on the ground. "There's a perfectly good water hose over there. Why the hell are we hauling water all the way up here in buckets, only to barely sprinkle any on these plants. Let's get the damn hose, and water the plants! It would be so much faster!"

The older man ignored him for a moment, giving all of his attention to the tiny tomato seedling in front of him.

"Go fill your bucket up," he finally said. "Since your water seems to be on the ground now. Fill it up again, and come back over here when you're done."

"You've got to be kidding me."

"Do I look like a joking man?" he asked harshly.

Ben looked him over, scrutinizing every feature of him with a glare. He was older, but not old enough to be truly considered _old._ He was tall and had an athletic build about him that had most likely been lanky when he was younger, but had filled out with age. He had dark skin from working outdoors, and dark hair that was dusted with the beginnings of gray. The farmer, Tom, matched Ben's glare with one of his own, rivaling him in the dirty looks department.

For a moment Ben lost a fraction of his control, and he saw Tom's eyes narrow as the collar of his shirt tightened around his throat. He could have sworn he felt a tightening around his own throat as well, but the sensation quickly faded and he convinced himself that he had imagined it altogether.

"How old are you Ben?" Tom asked carefully, letting his glare drop. Their contest for dominance appeared to be over, at least for now.

"I'm thirty," Ben replied in a huff, feeling his confidence return as the other man backed down.

"Then start acting your age instead of your shoe size. Only children throw tantrums."

And just like that his anger erupted. Who the hell was this old man to tell him he was acting like a child?

"You don't speak to me that way," he growled, his tone overly threatening. "Do it again and I'll-"

"You'll what?" Tom interrupted. "You'll hit me? Unleash all that pent up anger you have on me? Maybe even kill me? You can hurt me, Ben, but it's just going to make you look like a jackass. And what happens when your pretty little wife makes you angry? You gonna hurt her too?"

"N-No!" he stammered, taken completely off guard. "I would never-"

"You would never hurt her," Tom scoffed. "That's what you want yourself to believe, but you and I both know that's not true. One day you're going to lose control and you'll regret your actions, but it will be too late. You've got a temper on you, Ben, and you need to learn to control it before you do something you'll regret."

"You don't know me," Ben snarled.

"I know enough. Now do you want me to teach you how to farm or not?"

Ben stood there for a long moment, face red with anger and frustration. "Yes," he finally said through gritted teeth.

"Then go get some more water."

He took the bucket and did as he was told, cursing the older man the whole way. When he finally brought his bucket of water back to where he was before, he had cleared his head a little and was not angry enough to kill anyone.

"Before you get angry next time ask why," Tom commanded without looking at him.

"Why what?" he growled, barely able to conceal his irritation.

"Why we're doing this 'ridiculous' task," Tom smirked.

"Why _are_ we doing this ridiculous task?"

"The tomato plants are frail at this stage," Tom remarked calmly, not even a hint of anger in his voice. "They won't be frail for long, but when you first plant them, they are. The stems are not strong enough to support the plant yet. Any trauma, floods, bad weather, they'll destroy the plants, and then everything you've worked for is gone. When you first plant them you have to water them by hand so you don't beat the stems down too much. It's not forever, only for a week or two. Then, when they're stronger, you can use the water hose. All they need is a little care and a little patience, and they'll start to take off."

Ben crouched down next to Tom and began watering the tomato plants once again, listening to the older man talk.

"I can tell you're from privilege," he continued. "You've probably had everything you could ever want and more. I bet things have always been your way or the highway. Correct me if I'm wrong."

Ben said nothing, so he continued.

"Wherever you came from, you're not there anymore. People aren't just going to give you whatever you want. You have to earn an honest living as an honest man, and to do that you need patience, which is something you're severely lacking. You need to learn to control that temper of yours if you're ever going to make it out here."

"Anger is good," Ben said automatically, as he had been conditioned to say for so long. "Embracing your rage gives you absolute power and absolute control."

"Only absolute power to destroy," Tom remarked offhandedly. "But no power to give life, or to protect it. And the control you feel you have is only an illusion."

Ben gave him a confused look, not quite understanding what he meant, and was a bit disheartened when Tom laughed.

"You haven't ever heard it that way, have you?" the older man asked curiously. "I'm not saying that anger and rage don't have a purpose, because they do. I'm just saying that allowing anger and rage to rule your life will eventually destroy you. There are only two instances I can think of when anger and rage are useful and even necessary. When someone threatens your land and livelihood, and when someone threatens your family. You don't mess around when it comes to those things. If your family or your land is threatened, you kill ruthlessly and with no remorse, because they'll do the same to you if you give them a chance. There is no need for rage in any other setting than this."

"How do you know all this?" Ben questioned. "I've always either heard that anger should never be experienced, or that it should be experienced completely. How do you know how to balance it?"

"Years of terrible, heartbreaking experience," Tom said quietly. "But that is a story for another time. I like you, Ben. I see a lot of potential in you. I'll teach you everything you need to know to survive out here. I'll teach you to control that temper of yours too, but you have to want it. I can only show you how if you'll let me. Only you can decide what kind of man you want to be."

Ben finished watering the last tomato plant in his row. He thought about many things. He thought about what his uncle Luke had tried to teach him, about absolute control of his emotions. He had rejected the ways of the Jedi, for he was far too passionate to be one of them. He thought about Supreme Leader Snoke, and the lessons he had learned with the First Order. No control, only rage, only destruction. Tom offered him something in between, something he had never heard of before and it intrigued him.

Lastly, he thought of Rey. He loved her and would do anything for her. He would never hurt her. Or would he?

The thought sprung up unbidden like a snake in the grass. His grandfather, Anakin Skywalker, had said the very same thing, yet in his anger he had almost killed his wife. His grandmother had died of a broken heart, alone and afraid of the very man she loved the most.

He thought of his Rey again, so beautiful and perfect. He thought of the fire in her hazel eyes, and the way her body melded with his when they made love. He remembered fondly the way that she told him she loved him, and how his heart ached for her every second that they were apart. He had promised to take care of her, to protect her from anything or anyone who threatened her. The thought of him hurting her, even by accident, and causing her to be fearful of him was more than he could bear. He was his, and he had to protect her, even if that meant protecting her from himself.

Ben looked to Tom, who was waiting patiently for him to speak, and because of his love for Rey he said two simple words.

"Show me."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey sat in the grass looking over the lake by their house. She felt the wind in her hair, but today it brought her no joy. _It couldn't be true, it just couldn't._

But she knew it was.

The old woman who ran the shop she worked in wouldn't lie to her. She didn't know who Rey was, and she had no reason to deceive her.

They were all gone. Every last one of them.

"Finn," she whispered to herself as the tears came fast and hot. Her friend, one of the first that she had ever truly had, was dead. She never got to say goodbye.

"I'm sorry Finn," she whispered through her tears. "I should have been a better friend. I should have spent more time with you and Poe when you asked. I'm sorry that I was selfish and upset the entire time I was with you, and I wish I would have taken the time to tell you what a great friend you were. I wish I could have said goodbye…"

Rey sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity, letting the tears fall. She cried for her friend, wishing that she could have done more and said more to show him how much he had meant to her.

In a way, she felt almost ashamed. Finn was dead, having given his life for the Resistance, and was here, hiding out with Ben in paradise. There was no denying what it was, this was paradise, plain and simple. She wished that Finn was still alive. She knew that he would have loved to see this place.

Rey felt his presence before she heard him.

She said nothing, merely letting the calm that he exuded wash over her as he sat down next to her in the grass. He was silent as well, letting her choose when she wanted to speak with him.

"Finn is dead," she exhaled painfully. "I never got to say goodbye."

The tears came again, hot and fast. Ben pulled her into his lap and she buried her face in the crook of his neck as he held her.

"Finn died for something that he believed in," Ben told her softly. "People like Finn and Leia may die, but they're never truly dead. Everyone that knows them and loves them carries a part of them in their hearts and in their memories. So long as you and I are alive, they will never be completely dead."

"Can I ask you something?" Rey found herself saying suddenly. She pulled her face up to look him in the eyes, noting the sadness that was there.

"Anything," he breathed.

"You tried to save Leia," she began slowly.

"A lot of good that did," he snorted. "She ended up dying anyways."

"That's not the point," Rey sighed. "I've been wanting to ask you for some time… You tried to save your mom, yet you ran a lightsaber through your own father. Why?"

"It's complicated," he remarked tiredly. "Han Solo was never a good father, and he was never around. Always out chasing the next big score. He was more interested in making money and swindling people than he was in raising a son. He wrote me off, so I wrote him off. Simple as that. Killing him was slightly personal, but mostly to prove my loyalty to the First Order. Snoke would have been highly displeased if I had allowed him to live. "

"Oh…" Rey mumbled, seeing the hurt and bitterness in his eyes. Having not had the luxury of parents, she could not say that she would be able to kill her own, but she understood what he was feeling to a certain extent. She knew what it was like to feel abandoned and unloved. She could resonate with him on that.

"After Leia died, how did you keep it from breaking you?" she inquired, changing the subject. "How did you move on?"

"I never moved on," Ben grunted. "You never truly get over the loss of someone you love. You just learn to live with it. Hold on to the good in your life. Find what makes you happy and hold on to that. The pain probably won't ever go away, but you learn to live, even when you're hurting."

"This is the good in my life," Rey whispered, leaning back against him. "So long as I have you, I can forget everything else, even if it's only for a little while."

Ben held her tightly, pulling her into his chest and pressing his face into her hair.

"You'll always have me," he mumbled. "I'm not going anywhere."

Rey closed her eyes, letting his presence soothe her. She focused on the strong beat of his heart, timing it with her own until she could no longer tell them apart. Ben was her sanctuary, the calm after the storm and her safety net when she was falling. With him, she could do anything. Without him, she feared she would lose herself.

"Promise me," she begged.

"I promise," he mumbled back. "Until my last breath, I am yours."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

General Phasma sat at her computer screen, in the command center looking over possible leads for Kylo Ren's location. Twelve possible planets, each having records of a man and woman somewhat matching Ren and Rey's description having moved there around the time Ren disappeared.

"Son of bitch. What a fucking mess," she sighed tiredly.

She had been looking for months, and odds were that it would take several more before she found them. Wherever they were, she hoped Ren was happy. He was certainly causing her enough trouble.

"Brienne," a voice called out behind her.

All conversation around her stopped, and the techs in the command center turned to look her way, their faces screaming of anticipation for her reaction. She stood up and turned on him, already knowing exactly who it was even before she saw him.

"I believe we've had this conversation before _Captain_ ," she spat. "I've made it very clear that you are to call me General Phasma, and nothing else. You would do well to remember that."

"Yes ma'am," Jimmy mumbled, crestfallen.

She had felt sorry for him at first, but now all she could feel was anger. She had hoped that he would give up the whole Hux impersonation after Hux was gone, but if anything it had only gotten worse.

He wasn't just trying to look like Hux anymore. No, that wasn't enough for him. He was trying to _be_ Hux. It disgusted her and she hated him for it. Hux's memory was being sullied by this _loser_ that lacked the tact to realize that she was grieving. Jimmy was doing everything he could to take Hux's life for his own, and unfortunately for Phasma, that meant trying to win her over as well. She avoided him as much as possible, but somehow that she hadn't quite figured out yet, the bastard _always_ managed to find her.

"Why are you here?" she asked bluntly, not caring to play games with him today.

Jimmy's face turned red, and he shifted nervously from one foot to the other.

"I…uh…I was hoping that you might want to have a few drinks with me tonight," he spit out, stumbling over his words like an embarrassed child.

"Jimmy," she sighed. "We've been through this before. If you want to go through it again, we can talk about it privately at a later time."

She had been trying to save him from embarrassment, from calling him out in front of their subordinates, but he didn't seem to take the hint.

"You're not being fair," he accused, pouting openly. "You went out with Hux. You gave him a chance. I've done everything I can to be like him. Why won't you give me a chance?"

Phasma could feel her blood boiling over as he talked, until finally she exploded.

"Jimmy!" she shouted "You are _not_ Hux! You will _never_ be Hux! And I will _never_ go out with you! So stop trying!"

She regretted the words as soon as she said them, even though they were all true. Chuckles and sniggers rose up all around her, followed by a few not so subtle coughs and mumblings. Jimmy looked mortified and Phasma shook in anger. How dare he make her do this! Her heart was still in pieces after losing Bernard, and he had the gall to make her show weakness in front of their subordinates. She wanted nothing more than to kill him right then and there.

"I'm sorry," Jimmy mumbled. "It won't happen again."

"Just go," she growled, trying to hide the tears that threatened to spill.

He scurried out as laugher and jeers followed him. Phasma kicked over the chair she had been sitting in only a moment and grabbed her helment, shoving it on roughly.

She would go to the range and practice with her blaster until she was calm enough to report Jimmy's breach of professionalism to Snoke. Somehow a blaster in her hand always made her feel better.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Two days later, Jimmy finally emerged from his quarters, more ashamed than he had ever been in his life.

 _Demoted_.

The word stuck in his head, tearing at the very fabric of his being. Supreme Leader Snoke had been very clear on what was to become of him. His unprofessional conduct was putting him right back in radar.

The last few days had been rough on him to say the least. He had trashed his quarters, tearing up everything in sight. He had ordered a new wardrobe and he had dyed his hair black, anything so that he didn't look like Hux anymore. He wanted to stay in his quarters forever, but he had a job to do, and it was time to face reality. He had been foolish in his approach with Phasma, and he was dreading the reception he would receive now that everyone knew.

Jimmy made his way down to the mess hall, taking the least used paths until he finally arrived. He got in line, ignoring the stares, and took a plate of some very disgusting looking mush.

When he left the line to find a seat, he found everyone's eyes on him. Some stared, some whispered, and some laughed openly.

Great. He was now the laughingstock of the entire First Order.

He looked for anywhere he could sit that he wouldn't be laughed at. Across the room he saw Lieutenant Colonel Zack and Tim, a stormtrooper, over in the corner, and to his surprise they weren't laughing. They seemed to be focused on Hux's (now Phasma's) cat, Millicent, who was running around close to their table.

He walked up behind them close enough to hear their conversation, and paused, trying to decide if he should ask to sit with them.

"What do you think that little shit is up to?" he heard Tim ask quietly.

"I dunno. Cat stuff," Zack replied rolling his eyes. "She is a cat after all."

"An evil cat."

"I don't think cats have the capacity for evil. That's more of a human trait."

"She took a shit in my lunch box!" Tim exclaimed. "What could possibly be more evil than destroying all of my hopes and dreams of eating a clean lunch?"

"Well in Millicent's defense, you did spill fifty-seven packages of pop rocks in there. Pop rocks are very similar in consistency to cat litter," Zack reasoned.

"I was saving those for later! And that's not the only thing she's done either. Terry said she ate his breakfast last week too."

"Well Terry's a fucking liar," Zack groaned. "Remember that story he told us about he caught that sixty pound fish that almost pulled him under? I asked his wife about it, and she said that the fish was only two pounds. She also said that the only reason he almost went under was because he slipped off the dock baiting his line."

"No!" Tim exclaimed. "That was the coolest story ever! Everything I know is a lie!"

The orange tabby Tim had been talking about jumped up on the table beside them. She rubbed up against Zack, who petted her, them promptly hissed at Tim before running off.

"See. Evil."

Zack sighed, and Jimmy finally found the nerve to speak to them.

"Hey can I sit with you guys?" he asked quietly, holding his lunch tray awkwardly as he awaited their response.

Zack and Tim both did a double take, their eyes widening when they looked at him.

"We..um… we have a meeting," Zack struggled.

"About what?" Jimmy baited him, calling his bluff.

"Umm… it's about, um…"

"What my friend means to say," Tim jumped in. "Is that you're weird, and we don't really want to sit with you."

"Oh…Alright…" Jimmy mumbled before walking away. He heard Tim mumble something about him being annoying, but he didn't want to listen anymore.

He hit the doors of the mess hall, and kept walking, looking for anywhere he could eat without being laughed at. He walked to the staff lounge, knowing that it was usually empty this time of day. To his relief, he was right. He walked into the empty lounge, thankful that he was alone, and sat down at one of the tables to eat.

His eyes wandered over the employee photos on the wall, and he almost choked on his food when he saw his.

The photo had been taken a while back, when he still looked like General Hux. He was grinning in the photo, happy to be on board with the First Order, but someone had taken the liberty of adding to it.

He noted with horror that someone had drawn a really stupid looking mustache on his face, and next to him were several speech bubbles.

The first simply said "Derp." The second said "I wish I was as cool as General Hux," and the final speech bubble said "No one likes me, especially not General Phasma! I'm a loser!"

He jumped up in rage and ripped the photo off of the wall. Jimmy stormed out of the lounge, his lunch forgotten, and headed back to his quarters.

He would show them. He would show them all.

He knew that Phasma had been looking for Kylo Ren over the last several months. He would find him first. He would be the one to deliver Ren to Supreme Leader Snoke. He would be the hero, and he would laugh as Phasma's career went down in flames.

If he couldn't have her, he would just have to settle for destroying her.

 **Meanwhile, back on the ranch…**

 **Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed the chapter and the direction I've chosen to take this story! I know I said that I wouldn't have any fillers, and I apologize because I feel like that's what this chapter is. I had originally intended for this to be combined with the next chapter into one larger chapter, but it just got way out of control and was going to be WAY too long and you guys would be waiting longer for an update. I didn't feel that was fair, so I split this into two chapters. Also, I thought it would be nice to give Rey and Kylo Ren a brief moment of happiness before I bring the gauntlet down on them again. The next chapter will be back to our regularly scheduled fest of death and violence. Hooray! I apologize for all of the Reylo fluff as well. That was all that my concussion riddled brain wanted to write, so that's what you got : 0**

 **Its' spring now, and I've spent more time on my four wheeler checking on cows then I have in my house over the last few weeks, so with much regret I will be bringing this story to a close soon. I could go on forever with this, but the time between updates would be very unfair to you. With that being said, there will be two more chapters left in this story. I will update as quickly as possible, but with calving season updates might take me a little longer than normal, so just be patient with me. I have big plans for the next two chapters, and I don't think you will be disappointed by any means.**

 **Anyways, please leave me some feedback! I love hearing from you guys, and your comments inspire me to write faster! Hope you're all having a great week!**

 **Lots of love**

 **-Boss**


	6. The Stand

**Hello good people of fanfiction! I'm thrilled to be back and posting a new chapter for you today! I knew exactly what I was going to write before I even started, so it was just a matter of getting my thoughts on paper and then typing them up. It's got Reylo fluff! Along with some action and a few surprises in store! ; ) Yay! This has by far been my favorite chapter to write, and I truly hope it shows in the story!**

 **Moving on….**

 **I would like to give a shout out to alpha wolfstar, purplestar613, 5289belle, JuliaAurelia, Aleta Wolff, Mitil Tenten, CountessR, mie040401, fanficaddict14, SaintsFan1, ShortySC22, belladu57, Serenechemnerd, Sam, and our unnamed guest who reviewed this story! You guys are fantastic as always, and your reviews are very much appreciated! Thank you for taking the time to give me some feedback on this story. It means the world to me, and inspires me to work that much harder to ensure that this story will meet your expectations. To answer a few of your questions… I did have the lake where Anakin and Padme married in mind when I wrote the last chapter. Naboo just seemed so perfect, and I found it highly fitting to bring Rey and Ben full circle with the prequels, especially since Ben idolizes his grandfather so much! As for if they get a happy ending or not… I won't tell you. You'll have to read and find out ; ) I do think that you will be satisfied with the ending I've chosen for this story, but that's all I'll say about that.**

 **Thank you also to everyone who has favorited and followed this story! I never dreamed it would get this much of a following! All of you are wonderful, and even though we don't officially know each other, I am thrilled that you've chosen to take the time out of your busy lives to read some of my work. So thank you all again and again for your support of this story!**

 **Without further ado, here is the next chapter! Enjoy!**

Chapter 6: The Stand

"Keep your chin up when you fight," Ben commanded. "Don't watch my lightsaber. Watch me. Look for my tells, find my weaknesses. Only then will you be able to anticipate my next move and use it against me."

He slashed at Rey, and was pleased when she immediately blocked. He slashed again and was blocked once more. She was getting better, there was no doubt of that.

He winked at her mischievously, then slashed again. Rey parried the blow, then surprised him with one of her own. He blocked just in time, but her strike took him off guard and he stumbled back. She used his momentary loss of balance to strike again, knocking him off of his feet with the effort to parry the blow.

He grinned as Rey loomed over him, their red and blue blades entwined mere inches from his throat.

"You're getting better," Ben noted with approval.

"I have a good teacher," she grinned back him, her eyes alight with glee.

She knelt in front of him, bringing her face to almost touch his, her breath hot on his cheeks.

"Lightsaber skills aren't all you've taught me," she whispered seductively before pressing her lips to his.

Ben moaned at the feel of her soft lips caressing his. He would never tire of this as long as he lived. He closed his eyes to enjoy the moment, when suddenly she pulled away.

He heard a hiss as she extinguished her lightsaber, and he followed suit with her own. Rey gave him a playful wink before she began to remove her clothing.

She was going to be the death of him, he was sure of it.

He felt himself becoming aroused as she stripped off her black training clothes, one piece at a time, until she was bare before him. Ben motioned for her to come to him, so he could touch the perfection that was her body, but Rey merely shook her head and grinned mischievously.

"If you want to touch, you'll have to catch me," she teased.

He barely had time to register her words before she took off, and he was left scrambling to his feet. Of course, he did the only reasonable thing that he could do. He chased her, stripping his own black training clothes off piece by piece as he ran.

Ahead of him, Rey jumped into the lake and started swimming away. For the first time, Ben regretted teaching her to swim. He dived in after her with no hesitation, and swam her way.

"Remember what I told you!" he shouted to her as he swam. "Keep your head above water at all times, and if you get tired, roll over on your back and float!"

He watched her swim with pride. She was doing much better than he had ever expected. She was fearless, and he loved her even more for it.

Rey swam away from him, but he was faster, and he quickly caught her. She gave an undignified squeal as he pulled her to him, and he held her above water as she panted for air.

"I told you to float on your back when you got tired," Ben scolded disapprovingly.

"I knew you wouldn't let me drown," Rey panted, wrapping her arms around him.

He pressed his lips to hers, tasting her with want. For Ben it seemed that he could never get enough of her, and the passage of time had only intensified the need he felt. Her bare skin against his sent a shiver down his spine, and he found himself holding her tighter.

Ben swam towards the shore, and was not surprised when Rey pushed away from him to swim on her own. She was strong now, much stronger than she had been before, both in combat and in physical endurance. She no longer needed him to teach her or to protect her. Ben was proud of her, but at the same time her independence still hurt. A part of him wanted her to need him, and he feared outliving his usefulness to her.

As though she read his thoughts, Rey swam back to him and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, allowing him to swim the rest of the way in to shore. He lay her on the grass, and propped himself up around her where his body lay on top of hers, but he was not resting his weight on her.

Ben looked at her for a long moment, memorizing every feature of her face as she smiled up at him. It hurt him, how much he loved her. She was his weakness, his achilles heel, and he was tied to her with everything that he was. The First Order would need not look any further than Rey to destroy him completely.

"What's wrong? You act like you're never going to see me again," she joked, her mind gently prying at his. He let her in, sending his thoughts to her, because he was too afraid to put them into words.

 _I'm afraid this fragile life that we've built cannot last. I want nothing more than to stay like this with you forever, to start a family with you, to grow old with you, to die at your side after a long life well lived. Nothing would please me more, but I fear that we are still being hunted, even now._

 _Then let them come for us_ Rey thought back to him. _We're strong. Together we can fight and win. We've been running the trap line in the woods. We know this place. They don't. We can take whatever they throw at us._

 _You don't know Snoke._

 _I don't have to know Snoke. I know you._

"You have too much faith in me," Ben mused.

"And you don't have enough faith in yourself," Rey scolded. "We can do this. I know we can. If they want us, let them come for us. I refuse to let the First Order dictate how we live our life."

"You're beautiful when you're angry," he grinned mischievously.

"You better kiss me before I decide to get really angry," Rey teased.

Ben did as he was told, and his lips captured hers softly as they had so many times before. He kissed her with an insatiable hunger, his lips moving quickly from hers to her throat, kissing and sucking at the tender flesh there with purpose.

Rey moaned softly, and Ben could feel himself grow hard against her. He knew that she felt it too, and he growled in pleasure when she ground her hips against him. Without a word he entered her, enjoying the little gasp she made as she adjusted to his size.

Ben rocked into her a few times, but was not pleased when he saw a slight grimace of discomfort on her face. The ground not as soft as he would like, and that just wouldn't do.

He gripped her hips tightly, and flipped her own with a growl of annoyance. Rey supported herself on her hands and knees as Ben thrust into her from behind.

He moved slow and steady, aware of how her body reacted to every movement, and adjusting his pace as needed. He gripped her hips tightly, and closed his eyes in pleasure.

Rey moaned beneath him, and he went deeper, his body responding beautifully against hers.

Ben felt as though he was dying, on the precipice between anticipation of pleasure and the realization of it.

He moved harder and faster, feeling her body react to his acutely by leaning into him.

When Rey screamed his name, he was gone, falling off of the precipice and into the dark abyss of absolute pleasure. He panted as he finished, spilling himself inside of her.

As his body recovered, he fell back into a sitting position and pulled Rey with him so that her back was pressed against his chest. He planted kissed on her shoulders, fondled her breasts, and whispered his love to her. He loved her so much that at times their intimacy was painful. Not because it wasn't pleasurable, but because he couldn't ever be close enough. Even perfection was not enough for the woman he loved, he needed more of her, and he needed her to know his very heart and soul.

They sat like that for some time, catching their breath, until Ben could no longer feel his legs. After that they lay in the grass together, bodies entwined for a while longer, neither wanting to break the moment.

Half an hour later, when they could shirk their duties no longer, Ben pulled on his pants as he watched her dress.

He found his eyes on her almost all of the time as of late. It wasn't something that he did intentionally, it was just something that happened, and he liked watching her too much to avert his eyes.

Rey pulled her tight black training shirt on over her head, and blushed when she felt his eyes on her. Even after the many months they had lived together as husband and wife, sharing their bed and their bodies freely, he knew that his gaze could still make her blush.

"You better get dressed," she chided him. "Tom's coming for dinner tonight, remember?"

And he did remember. His employer, Tom, was slowly becoming a part of their lives. At first, it was merely because he was alone with no family to look out for him, but slowly that had morphed into something more.

Tom had become almost a father figure to Ben, teaching him everything that Han Solo should have taken the time to show him. He was a good man, always patient, and always willing to help.

He trusted Tom, although it wasn't a feeling that had developed overnight. It had taken months of careful observation, of vetting his intentions very closely, before that trust had formed. Every test he threw at him, Tom had passed, and Ben was forced to conclude that his intentions were genuine.

He had been reluctant to introduce him to Rey in the beginning as well, but when he finally did, he had been surprised to see how well they got along. Rey adored Tom. She had said as much to him several times, and Tom seemed to care for her as well. Ben had slowly found his employer spending more and more time with them, and he surprisingly found that he enjoyed the man's presence. It was Rey who had suggested that they invite Tom over for dinner tonight, and he had happily agreed.

Ben was pulling his shirt up over his head when he heard Tom's speeder pull up to their house. He and Rey went up to meet him, greeting him fondly and showing him the progress of Ben's crops. As the sun went down behind the trees, they headed inside to make dinner.

The three of them cooked together, feeling very much like a strange sort of family. They cooked vegetables that Ben had grown on their land, along with fish that Rey had caught in the lake. They had drinks, and the mood was light as they worked together.

"Ben's made a fine hand," Tom was telling Rey proudly. "He's a hard worker, and he's learned the trade a lot quicker than I expected."

"From what he's told me, you're a good teacher," Rey commented as she put the fish on to bake. "How long have you been farming?"

"Almost all my life," Tom said proudly. "My mom taught me. She farmed on Mandalore with my grandparents. They were good people."

"What about your dad?" Rey asked curiously. "Was he a farmer too?"

Tom's expression changed, but only for a moment before he regained his composure.

"I never met him," he remarked sadly. "He left before I was born. I don't think he even knew I existed."

"I'm sorry," Rey apologized immediately, regretting having asked.

"Don't be," Tom grunted. "I had my mother and my grandparents. I was luckier than most."

Rey turned to pull the vegetables out of the oven, and accidently knocked a plate off of the counter top. Before she even had a chance to catch it, Tom was there. The plate never hit the ground. He caught it easily, and returned it to it's place on the counter.

"Thanks," Rey said gratefully. "You have quick reflexes."

"Lots of practice," Tom shrugged, but Ben caught Rey's disbelieving glance in his direction.

He had suspected for some time that Tom was Force sensitive, but he didn't know for sure. If he was, he was certainly doing an excellent job of hiding his signature from Ben. He could feel nothing in the Force from the older man, but there had been a few times he was almost certain he _had_ to be.

Ben gathered the food, and the three of them sat down together at the table to eat. The mood was light as they ate, and they talked easily of farming and life on Naboo. He was about to tell the story of how Tom made him plow up a barren field with nothing but a hoe, when he saw it.

A flicker of light outside the window. It was gone as quickly as he saw it, but there was no doubt of what it was.

He stood quickly, fear and anger coursing through him.

"I'll be back," he growled angrily. Rey stood to go with him but he wouldn't have it. "Stay here" he commanded her sharply, before sending his thoughts to her.

 _Someone is here. I'm going to check it out. I'll be back soon. Stay with Tom. I can't lose you._

"What's going on?" Tom demanded, standing up as well.

"Stay here with Rey. I'll be right back."

Without another word, Ben was out the door and stalking quietly through the night. The weight of his lightsaber on his hip brought him comfort as he moved. He started at the spot where he had seen the light, searching and listening for any sign of an intruder.

A crack of branches underfoot, and Ben was on the move again, this time towards the woods behind the lake. If the intruder was trying to escape that way, he was in for a nasty surprise.

He moved quickly into the woods, weaving between trees and counting his steps. He knew exactly when to jump and when to side step. He and Rey had practiced so many times that it was engrained in his mind.

Ahead of him, he could hear the crunch of branches and leaves as his quarry began to run. Ben followed, but kept his pace. It wouldn't be long now.

He heard a snap and the unmistakable clink of steel on steel, followed by a bloodcurling scream. He kept his pace, moving slowly, and counting his steps until he finally found his quarry.

The man was small and wore a standard First Order uniform with a flashlight on his hip. He lay on the ground, shaking violently, and Ben was shocked when he saw the damage. The steel trap had snapped his leg, almost severing it from his body. He was shaking from the blood loss, and Ben knew that his time with the man was limited.

"How did you find me?" he growled, grabbing the man by his collar and bringing his face within inches of his own.

"Been looking for you for a long time now," the man slurred between violent shakes. "What has it been, eight months since you disappeared?"

"How many are with you?" Ben demanded. "Who knows I'm here?"

The man shook and looked away from him defiantly. Ben used the Force to tighten his airways until he was ready to talk.

"I'm alone!" he gasped, trying to catch his breath. Ben let off his airways so he could speak freely. "No one knows you're here yet! I haven't had time to tell them. Did you set these traps? I always heard you were sadistic, but…fuck…"

"Shut up," Ben growled. "You are _not_ going to ruin this for me, and you're sure as hell not going to hurt Rey."

The man shook violently again, his eyes closing in pain. "Kill me," he begged. "Don't let me die like this."

Ben threw him to the ground and ignited his lightsaber, the blade glowing eerily in the darkness of the woods.

"With pleasure," he snarled, as he drove the crimson blade directly through the man's heart.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey and Tom sat by the fireplace, each taking turns looking out the window anxiously. They had cleaned up dinner, washed the dishes, and now there was nothing to do but wait. Rey fidgeted nervously, her fear showing plainly on her face.

"He'll be fine," Tom reassured her. "Ben can take care of himself."

"I know," Rey admitted. "But I worry anyways."

"You truly love him don't you?" Tom asked her kindly.

"Very much. Thank you for helping him adjust here," she said suddenly. "He's different than he was before. He's better, more patient, and calmer now. I know you had something to do with it, but he's too proud to admit it."

"He's always been what he is now," Tom remarked. "I'm just helping him grow into the man I know he can be."

He looked at her then, meeting her eyes with his own as if gauging her facial expressions for anything she was afraid to say.

"You know that if you and Ben are in trouble, you can tell me, right?" he prompted, looking for any little break in her defenses that would give him the truth he sought. "You two are like family to me, and I would be happy to help you however I could."

"I know," Rey nodded slowly. "And thank you."

She was silent for a moment in thought before she spoke again.

"Were you ever married?" she asked suddenly.

Tom seemed taken off guard for the second time that night, though to his credit he recovered quickly.

"Once," he told her sadly. "She was beautiful and strong, I loved her very much."

"What happened to her?" Rey queried carefully.

"She was killed by the First Order. They slaughtered her on the spot, simply because they mistook her for someone else."

"I'm so sorry," Rey whispered. "Was it just the two of you?"

"We had a daughter," Tom said slowly. "She was a fierce little thing, and beautiful just like her mother."

"Did the First Order kill her too?" Rey asked, fearing the answer.

"No," Tom remarked, his tone changing to what could have been pride or even happiness. "She escaped, and she's living a life of her own now."

"Do you ever get to see her?"

"I do. She seems very happy, and I couldn't be more proud."

Rey grinned at him as she leaned back in her chair, letting the fire warm her and make her sleepy.

"What was it like growing up after the Clone Wars?" she yawned. "I heard everything was a mess for a long time."

Tom told her tales of life after the Clone Wars as they waited for Ben. Rey could feel her eyes getting heavier with each passing moment, until she could no longer keep them open.

The next thing that she knew, Rey felt strong arms picking her up and carrying her away. She cracked her eyes open wide enough to see Ben's handsome face set in a sharp line as he carried her. He seemed worried and angry, but at the moment Rey was too tired to ask him about it.

All that mattered was that he was here and he was safe. She snuggled into his chest as he carried her, and breathed in the scent that she had come to associate with him and only him. Her eyes closed again of their own accord, and she lost herself in dreams of Ben and of their life together.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

General Phasma looked over the results of her search and gave some thought to what would happen next.

She could go to Naboo and capture Kylo Ren and Rey. She could bring them back to Snoke and enjoy the glory that their capture would give her. She would be praised and possibly promoted even further.

Or she could take a second route.

She could let them go, forget she ever found them, and lie to Snoke.

The first option was obviously the better one. It would mean less trouble for her, and yet… Phasma didn't like it.

Supreme Leader Snoke was going to kill Rey in front of Ren, and he would no doubt torture them both before granting them death.

It just didn't sit well with her.

She thought of Hux, and what could have been with a sad smile. It appeared that Ren had found happiness, and she was reluctant to take it from him.

She was thinking over her options when one of the stormtroopers in her unit approached her, handing her an unmarked envelope. Phasma barely even had time to say thank you before the stormtrooper ran off.

Curious, she opened the envelope and pulled out a plain piece of paper with a few sentences scribbled on it.

 _Your computer has been hacked. All of your personal information and files have been compromised. Someone is out to get you. I'm not at liberty to say who, but out of respect for you, I felt that you needed to know. Watch your back and trust no one._

No signature. Nothing else. Just a few vague sentences with a dark undertone.

General Phasma rose from her seat knowing exactly what she was going to do. She would gather her things and she would take the fastest ship they had to Naboo. There was no time to waste.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ben tensed up as he took in the ruined corn stalks in the field. He could feel his anger rising up, but as usual, Tom sensed it.

"Take a deep breath, Ben," he advised. "It's going to be okay."

He did as he was told, breathing in and out slowly, and feeling his body relax with each breath.

"Being angry won't do you any good. The corn will still be ruined, and you'll just be angry. No matter how tough you are, you'll never win a fight with nature, so it's pointless to even try. You just clean up the mess and move on."

"Where do we even start?" Ben asked hopelessly.

"We fix the stalks that we can, and we pull up and replant the others. It takes some time, but it's necessary."

Ben nodded halfheartedly, and the two of them set to work. They had been at it for several hours when he heard a voice that he had hoped to never hear again.

"Ben Callian?" a woman called out uncertainly.

He stood up slowly to see Phasma approaching him. She was not in her usual chrome armor, but instead wore a simple First Order uniform. She held her hands out where he could easily see that she was not armed.

He approached her slowly, wiping the sweat and dirt from his brow as best he could. Phasma gave him a quizzical look, and Ben realized with some amusement that this was the first time she had seen him without his mask.

"Walk with me," he growled, passing her.

Phasma followed him until they were out of earshot, at which point he turned on her.

"Why are you here, and how did you find me?" he asked angrily.

"Finding you was not easy," Phasma began. "But as to why I'm here, I should ask you the same question. Did you really think that the ruthless Kylo Ren could just up and disappear without any consequences? Did you really believe that Snoke wouldn't find you, and that you could live happily ever after with your pet scavenger girl?"

"She is my wife!" he snapped before he could stop himself, his dark eyes blazing as they met Phasma's ice blue ones. He registered the look of surprise that came over her face, along with another emotion he couldn't quite place.

"That's what I was afraid of," she finally said. "None of this is going to go well for you, you have to know that."

"I'll take my chances," he growled. "If you're not going to kill me, then why are you here?"

"To give you a head start," she said simply. "I found you, and others will find you too. It's only a matter of time before the First Order comes for you. Take Rey and run while you still can."

"Why are you telling me this?" he asked suddenly. "You found me. Why not take me to Snoke? That would be the smart move for you."

Phasma looked at him for a long time, a pain behind her eyes that he was all too familiar with.

"Because you have a shot at happiness," she finally replied sadly. "And we all deserve better than what we've been dealt."

"I'm sorry about Hux," Ben mumbled.

"So am I," Phasma smiled sadly. "Take care of yourself, Ren."

She shook his hand in farewell and left without another word. Ben stood there for some time, mind reeling, until he felt Tom's presence behind him.

"So they've found you," the older man noted matter-of-factly. "What do you intend to do about it?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You think I don't know who you are, Kylo Ren?" Tom snarled, turning on him. "Don't insult my intelligence by pretending I don't know what's going on here."

Ben whipped around to face him, surprised by the venom in his voice.

"How long have you known?" he asked calmly.

Usually Tom was the ice to his fire, keeping calm when he lost his temper, but today the tables had turned in a very surprising way.

"I've known since the second I saw you. You don't exactly blend in very well," Tom snorted.

"Then why did you offer me a job?" Ben queried. "Why not turn me in? I'm sure the reward the First Order would have given you would set you up for life."

"I didn't turn you in because I needed to see what kind of man you were. I have a personal interest in you, Kylo Ren."

Tom was angry, that much was certain, though about what he couldn't say. His plight shouldn't have concerned the older man, especially if he had known his identity beforehand.

"Why do you have an interest in me?" he asked slowly, still remaining calm. He could feel the anger emanating from Tom through the Force, and on instinct he shifted his line of thought. "Who are you really?" he questioned. "You're not just Tom the farmer, no, you're more than that. Tell me who you are."

Tom approached him fearlessly, not stopping until he was in Ben's personal space, testing him for a reaction. Ben remained calm, holding his position, and never taking his eyes from the older man's.

"My name is Tom Kenobi," he said slowly, watching Ben for any reaction, any weakness. "My father was Obi-Wan Kenobi. He was injured during the Clone Wars, and my mother hid him and nursed him back to health. They had a very brief relationship. He never knew about me, and I never met him. When I was eighteen, I met and married a beautiful woman from Jakku. I loved her very much, and I left my mother all alone so that we could start a life together. We had a daughter and she was my world. I couldn't have asked for anything more."

Tom paused for a moment, giving Ben a hard look full of a hatred that he didn't understand.

"And then you came along," he continued. "You murdered all of those kids at the academy and became Kylo Ren. You ordered all Force sensitives to be hunted down and slaughtered. I was Force sensitive. My daughter was Force sensitive."

Ben felt his stomach turn at Tom's words, and instinctively he knew what he was going to say before he even said it.

"They came for us," Tom said slowly. "The First Order came for us on _your_ orders. I had to abandon my own daughter to save her life. My wife refused to leave my side, and when they found me, they slaughtered her instead. I was angry for a long time, Ben, angry at you in particular. I fantasized about killing you slowly and painfully for more nights than I care to remember. I couldn't go back for my daughter, so I had to settle for looking out for her from afar. She grew up knowing that I had abandoned her, and never knowing why, because of you. And imagine my outrage when I realized that she was in love with you!"

Ben eyes widened in realization. "Rey?" he asked dumbly.

"Yes," Tom growled. "Rey. You singlehandedly destroyed her life, and she loves you anyway. You're a monster, and the only thing you're good at is killing, maiming, and destroying every good thing in your path. So when I saw she was running with you, I had to intervene. I approached you with the intentions of making sure that you never had the chance to hurt my daughter, even if that meant killing you in cold blood."

Ben felt numb, the information too much for him to take in. His chest tightened in pain, and he struggled to take a deep breath.

"I-I'm sorry," he finally managed to get out. "I didn't know."

"Of course you didn't know, and even if you did, I doubt you would have cared. I was going to kill you, Ben," Tom said simply. "But I changed my mind after I met you. I saw that you loved Rey, and that she loved you, so instead of destroying her happiness for revenge, I decided to take you under my wing and help you be a better man. I still hate you, Ben, and some days I still think about killing you, but I also respect you for everything you've done for Rey. Despite everything you've done to my family, we're still on the same team. I want to keep Rey safe just as much as you do, so I need you to level with me man to man. How much trouble are you in?"

"A lot," Ben sighed. "Phasma came here to warn me. She said we should run."

"Are you going to run?" Tom demanded.

"I don't know," he replied honestly. "I'll talk to Rey. She's not going to like it. She thinks we should take a stand."

"Whatever you decide to do, I'm with you. Don't take Rey and run unless you tell me first, and if it comes to a fight, I'll stand with you."

"Thank you Tom," Ben said gratefully. "I mean it."

Tom merely nodded in response.

"Are you going to tell Rey?" Ben asked him suddenly. "I can't keep this from her, but I think it would be better if you told her yourself."

"She wouldn't understand."

"Then make her understand. She needs to know. She's spent her whole life thinking that she's alone. It's not fair to keep that from her."

"I know," Tom sighed. "I need to tell her."

The two men stood side by side in silence for awhile, each lost in their own thoughts. Finally, it was Tom who broke the reverie.

"You can run or you can make a stand," he said slowly. "Either way, things could get very ugly very fast. I know you love my daughter, but do you love her enough that you would die to keep her safe?"

"Of course," Ben replied instantly. "I would gladly give my life for her."

"Good," Tom nodded in approval. "Because you'll probably have to."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ben sat in the grass, looking out over the lake. The moon lit up the water, giving in an almost surreal appearance. It was beautiful here, and on a night he couldn't sleep, it certainly made it easier to have a view.

He breathed in deeply and closed his eyes, savoring the feel of the wind on his face. He had talked to Rey about their situation, and she wanted to fight, like he knew that she would.

For the first time in his life, he was truly afraid of the battle ahead. Not for himself, for he did not fear death. He was afraid for Rey. She had not seen battle as he had, and her absolute faith in him was a bit unnerving. What if he wasn't strong enough to protect her?

He knew in his heart that he could not live if she fell in the battle. He could never forgive himself for not being enough for her.

Friend, protector, husband, and lover. It was his burden to bear, and he bore it gladly, but he feared failing her all the same.

"Can't sleep?" Rey asked as she sat down next to him.

"I didn't mean to wake you," Ben apologized. "I just needed to sit and think for a little while."

"You didn't wake me," she said simply. "Just can't sleep without you anymore. The bed's too cold."

She made a face, and he laughed as he pulled her closer to him, situating her in between his legs, where her back could rest on his chest.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Ben asked her. "We could be setting ourselves up for failure. If we run, we can live longer."

"No," Rey interrupted. "No more running. Anything worth having has to be fought for. _This_ is worth having. The life we've built together is worth fighting for."

"If anything happened to you, I could never forgive myself," he said slowly, his voice coming out shaky and broken. "I could turn myself in. It's me that they want, and-"

"No," Rey snapped, turning so that she could face him. A fire blazed in her hazel eyes, that was only softened by the pale moonlight. "Don't play the part of the martyr, because that's not what you would be. If you turn yourself in, they'll kill you. You know it as well as I do. They might spare me, or they might decide to kill me too. I don't know. Either way it plays out, know this. If you turn yourself in, even with the intentions of protecting me, you won't be a hero, you'll be a fool. And I will spend every day of the rest of my life hating you for leaving me. Don't ask me to live without you, because I can't and I won't. We're partners, Ben. Whatever happens, we're in this together, and if you truly love me, you won't leave me."

"I do love you," Ben admitted, burying his face in her hair. "But I'm going to be the death of you. Your misplaced feelings for me are going to get you killed."

"Misplaced?" Rey snorted. "What we have is good. Why would I ever want anything else?"

"I'm a monster, Rey," he sighed. "I've killed more people than I could ever count. There's blood on my hands that will never go away. All I'm good for is hurting and destroying everything in my path. If it's good and beautiful, I snuff it out."

"That's not true at all," Rey scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Look at all of this!"

She gestured to the beauty around them, giving him a moment to take it all in.

"None of this would be if it wasn't for you. This place, the crops, our life together. Everything that's good is here because of you. You don't just destroy, you create too."

"You don't know all of the horrible things I've done."

"I don't care," she said simply. "Kylo Ren is dead. Everything that you did, and the man that you were behind the mask no longer matters. You're not Kylo Ren anymore. You're Ben now. You're a good man, and I love you."

"Why _do_ you love me?" Ben asked suddenly. "You could have found a good man anywhere. Why me? Is it the Force bond that we share? Why doesn't it matter to you that I've done terrible things?"

"I could have found other good men," Rey admitted. "But they wouldn't have been you. Our Force bond is strong, but that's not why I love you either. It's all of the little things that make you so different from everyone else."

She thought for a few minutes, and Ben let her be, knowing that she would speak when she was ready.

"I love you because when you look at me, it's like I'm the only woman in the world, and you can't take your eyes off of me or I'll disappear. I love the crooked grin that you get when you're up to no good. I love the way that you touch me and make love to me. It's gentle and almost reverent at times, but still rough and animalistic when it needs to be. I love your passion and your drive. You dream big, and when you set yourself up to achieve your goals, nothing gets in your way. I love the way that you're quick to be patient and kind to me, but just as quickly, you can turn and be ruthless if the situation calls for it."

She smiled at him then, bringing her hands up to tangle in his dark hair.

"You're strong, passionate, and relentless," she continued. "You're the darkness to my light, my strength when I feel like giving up. You're my partner, my friend, my lover, and my other half. I don't want anyone but you, and what we have is worth fighting and even dying for. I have faith in you because I know how strong you are, and I know what you're capable of. We can do this, but you've got to be with me."

"I'm with you always," Ben said simply. "No more running. It's time we take a stand."

"Good," Rey grinned. "And if you even think about leaving me again, I'll kill you."

"I don't doubt that at all," Ben joked. "Your wrath is terrible to behold."

"Shut up and kiss me," Rey growled, rolling her eyes.

"As you wish," he grinned mischievously.

Ben kissed her passionately in the moonlight, fearful of the future, but knowing that whatever came, they could face it together.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey sat on the hard table, fidgeting nervously as she awaited the results. In her heart, she already knew what they would say. It both elated and terrified her, but she had to know for sure.

The local medic returned with a sheet of paper in his hand and a smile on his face.

"The test is positive," he said warmly. "Congratulations. I'll get some prescriptions for you before you leave, and I'll see you in a month."

Rey nodded her thanks, and left after taking the prescriptions. The test was positive. She was now undeniably pregnant.

She had suspected it for about a week, but she hadn't been completely sure until now. Not that it was a surprise or anything.

She and Ben had been intimate more times than she could count, and Rey had not bothered to get a birth control implant. The way she saw it, it either would or wouldn't happen, but she would be damned before she let fear of the First Order drive her decisions. Her stubbornness now seemed slightly foolish in light of their current situation.

She had just told Ben the night before that she wasn't afraid and she wanted to fight. She still wanted to fight, but now she had a reason to be afraid. It wasn't just her life at stake anymore.

Rey pushed away the fear, deciding instead to focus on the happiness that this new revelation brought her.

She and Ben had created something beautiful together, and the child growing inside of her was proof of their love. She could not imagine sharing this with anyone else, and she was anxious to tell him.

They would weather this storm together, and they would have the life that they fought so hard for. Rey would finally have a family like she had always wanted, and no one could take that from her. She was finally home.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ben and Tom found their way into the local pub after a long day in the fields. It had become their custom to grab a quick drink together after work before Ben went home. Rey didn't mind, and truthfully Ben rather enjoyed his time with Tom outside of work. The older man was always more relaxed and easier to talk to after he had a few drinks.

Tonight however, was different. Tom was tense, and Ben was anxious for him.

"I don't think I can do this," the older man said nervously. His hands shook a little as they sat down and ordered the usual.

"You're overthinking it," Ben reassured him. "Just tell her what you told me. She'll understand, and if she doesn't, you make her understand. It's going to be okay."

The bartender brought the two men their beers, both of which took a long drink before speaking again.

"I can't do this," Tom repeated.

"Yes you can."

"I can't."

"You can. If you think you're going to back out, write everything down and give it to her, or let her read your mind. Do one or the other. She needs to know, Tom."

"I know," the older man sighed. He grabbed a napkin from the bar, and pulled a pen out of his pocket. Slowly but surely, he began to write down everything that he wanted to say.

Ben watched him as he wrote, taking in the wide, broad strokes as he scribbled on the napkin. Tom's hand shook nervously as he wrote, but he kept going all the same. Even if their relationship was a strained one, Ben admired his courage, and he hoped that one day the two of them could learn to truly be friends. Tom could be a part of their lives, and Rey could be happy. That was the ultimate goal after all. Both he and Tom desired Rey's happiness above all else.

"Read it," Tom commanded him as he finished writing. "Tell me if it's good enough."

He slid the napkin over to Ben. He picked it up, scanning the note quickly.

"This is good," he remarked when he was finished. "But why didn't you tell her that it was my orders that caused all of this?"

"Because she loves you," Tom replied simply. "And she's had enough pain in her life. I don't feel that it's necessary to inform her that you were involved indirectly. You can tell her yourself if you want, but I've decided to keep that information between the two of us. I figure your conscience, assuming you have one, is already going to eat you alive. I don't want Rey hurting too."

"Fair enough," Ben responded before taking another drink of his beer.

He noticed his hands shaking of their own accord as he pulled the beer away. It happened quickly after that. Ben's head and neck felt stiff, and he broke out into cold sweat. He lost control of his body then, shaking violently.

He fell off of his barstool as he began to convulse, and his eyes tried to focus on Tom as he hit the ground, terrified that his mind would betray him as well as his body. Tom reached for him, terror in his eyes, but the damage was done.

Ben's eyes rolled back into his head of their own volition, and he convulsed uncontrollably. He tried desperately to hang on to consciousness, but he found himself having a hard time catching his breath. Tom was kneeling at his side, yelling at him, but he only comprehended a few of the words he said.

"Rey," he managed to get out between gasps. He motioned to his lightsaber and Tom took it from his belt.

"Take Rey and go," he wheezed, his words beginning to slur together.

Tom nodded, and gave him a look that spoke volumes of sadness.

"I'll take care of her," he promised, and with that he was gone, leaving Ben to die, and never looking back.

He lay there for what seemed like an eternity as a squad of First Order stormtroopers entered and cleared out the pub, leaving only him inside.

Ben couldn't move. He couldn't think, and he wasn't sure that he was even capable of speech anymore.

A man in a First Order uniform entered the pub and headed towards him slowly. He leaned down next to Ben, his black hair falling over his face and his dark eyes boring into his.

"Hello Kylo Ren," he smirked.

Ben felt a needle being plunged into his neck, and then everything went black.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey waited patiently for Ben to come home, busying herself with household chores to pass the time. She kept finding herself peeking out the window every few minutes, looking for him on the horizon as the sun took it's final bow.

She was uncharacteristically nervous, though she knew that she shouldn't be. Ben would be happy. There was no need to worry at all. They would celebrate together and everything would be just fine. No matter how many times she told herself, she still couldn't stop the nagging fear that plagued her. Everything was good, almost too good, and all good things eventually came to an end.

Lost in her thoughts, she had not been watching the horizon, and was surprised when the door opened and slammed shut suddenly.

"Ben?" she called out nervously.

But it wasn't Ben. It was Tom, and he seemed terrified. Something was very wrong.

"Where's Ben?" she asked instantly.

Tom didn't answer her immediately, instead he blocked the door with a chair before he even acknowledged her.

"Where is Ben?" she demanded, her body starting to shake in fear.

"Ben's gone," Tom finally said slowly. "He was poisoned. We have to get out of here. They'll come for you next."

"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on," Rey growled. "And I'm not leaving without Ben. We have to go get him now!"

Tom whirled around and grabbed her roughly by the shoulders, almost shaking her in his anger.

"We're not going back for Ben," Tom snarled. "He's dead. You'll have to process that later and grieve at another time. Right now I need you to focus."

Rey looked at him in shock. Her body and mind felt numb. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't. Ben was alive. He had to be. He couldn't be dead.

"He's dead," Tom told her again, as if reading her mind. "Grab your lightsaber. We're going out the back door."

Rey's mind was reeling. Ben was dead. He had been poisoned. Tom knew she had a lightsaber. How did he know she had a lightsaber? Why was he here? Was the First Order here too?

"Now Rey!" Tom shouted at her, shaking her from her thoughts.

She reacted on instinct then, summoning her lightsaber, and following Tom, who was already out the back door. They ran across the land, past Ben's crops, and all the way to the lake. The sound of the grass crunching underfoot and Rey's racing heart blended together as she tried to keep up.

She saw the beams of their flashlights first. Rey ignited her lightsaber, blue blade screaming, just in time to deflect a blaster shot that was aimed at her. A familiar crimson blade ignited next to her, and her heart broke into a million pieces when she realized that Tom carried Ben's lightsaber.

He was truly dead then. The realization hit her hard, crippling her. Her chest tightened painfully and she wanted to die.

"Rey!" she heard Tom shout, and she came back to reality just in time to avoid being shot.

She moved to stand back to back with Tom, both swinging their blades, deflecting shot after shot. The darkening sky around them lit up red and blue, and the screech of blaster shots filled the air. Their stance protected them, and gave them a measure of defense against the relentless fire.

The stormtroopers descended on them, more than Rey could count. They were everywhere, and she and Tom could only hold up so long against the sheer numbers of them. She slashed and swung wildly, taking out as many stormtroopers as she could. She used to Force, throwing them several at a time, and was surprised to see Tom doing the same.

They fought bravely, until the numbers won out. Every stormtrooper they killed was replaced by four more. Rey could feel herself wearing down. They couldn't keep this up. It was two against a hundred, and they just couldn't win with those odds.

"Rey!" Tom shouted. "You're going to have to run! Move away from me and head towards the trees! You can lose them in there!"

"What about you?" Rey shouted back.

"I'm staying here. I'll hold them off! Take this and read it later!"

He passed her a napkin that had been scribbled on, and she folded it up and put it in her pocket.

"I'm not leaving you here!" she protested as she cut down another stormtrooper.

"Yes you are!" he shouted at her. "Go! And no matter what you hear, don't look back! Go now!"

Rey could feel the tears stinging her eyes as she broke away from Tom, and headed towards the woods. She took down every stormtrooper in her path, either cutting them down with her lightsaber or throwing them back with the Force. She ran because her life depended on it.

When she hit the trees, she kept running, counting her steps as she went. Behind her she could hear the click and snap of steel traps finding their targets, as well as the screams of more men than she cared to hear.

For a moment, she heard Tom cursing at the top of his lungs. His profanity turned into a scream and Rey kept running as the tears fell unbidden.

All of this was wrong. She was supposed to be fighting with Ben at her side, but here was all alone, running through the woods in the dark with the sound of men's screams ringing in her ears. She wanted to die. She needed to die, but then she remembered the child inside of her. The last tie to the man she loved. His parting gift to her. She would fight, not for herself, but for this child. She had to, for she couldn't bear to lose them both.

She ran harder and faster, the sound of branches cracking under the feet of her pursuers in the back of her mind. They shot at her, and she turned to deflect the blasts. She lost count of her steps.

Rey tried using the Force, sensing danger where she could. Her pursuers shot at her again, and she parried the blasts one at a time. She stepped back to run again, and felt the breath leave her body when she heard a soft click, followed by a snap.

She screamed in agony as the steel trap closed around her leg, rendering her helpless. She tried to free herself, whimpering in pain with each breath that she took. She was getting dizzy and lightheaded, and knew that she didn't have long to get free. She used the Force then, prying the jaws of the trap and wrenching her leg free.

The blood was terrifying. It was everywhere, and Rey felt her stomach turn at the smell. Everything was blurry and surreal, as if all of this was happening to someone else instead of her. She tried to get up, and found that she couldn't, so she settled for dragging herself instead.

It was excruciatingly painful, and with every movement, Rey felt as though she would lose consciousness. She heard footsteps behind her, and she rolled over to face her pursuer.

The last thing she saw was the butt of a stormtrooper's blaster as it made contact with her face, and she remembered no more.

 **So that's all for this chapter! Only one more to go! What will happen to Rey and Ben? You'll have to read to find out!**

 **Please take the time to tell me what you think! I love hearing from you, and your comments inspire me to write faster! I hope you all have a fantastic weekend!**

 **Lots of love!**

 **-Boss**


	7. Shades of Gray

**Hi everyone! Hope you're all having a fantastic week! I apologize for the delay on posting this, but I had a hard time getting this chapter where I wanted it to be, and since it's the ending it had to be right. I feel that it might be a little jumpy, as it will be written similar to chapter 5. It just worked out that way, so sorry if all the character shifts are too much.**

 **I would like to give a shout out to , JuliaAurelia, Aleta Wolff, Mitil Tenten, 5289belle, bluejustice13, SaintsFan1, mie040401, ShortySC22, Nami Swannn, Stephycats7785, and our unnamed guest for reviewing this story! As always, you guys inspire me to keep writing! I apologize for ripping your hearts out as well. That was kind of a dick move on my part, but perhaps I can make it up to you this time around ; ) Besides, what kind of story would this be if everything was easy? Boring…. Haha. Anyways, thank you all so much for your love and support during the process of writing this, and I hope that I will be able to give this story the ending it deserves!**

 **So without further ado, I present to you the epic finale of Her Darkness, His Light! Hang on to your seatbelts, and as always, enjoy!**

Chapter 7: Shades of Gray

Ben struggled as they started to strap him to the table, using what little Force abilities he could summon to knock a few of the bastards backwards. His defiance was met with a sharp pain in the neck, and he knew it was over then.

They had been keeping him drugged, making sure his Force abilities were all but non-existent. An injection every day in the neck, followed by the hallucinogen had become his routine here. It was a nightmare, and he was powerless to stop it, but that didn't keep him from trying.

He lashed out, elbowing his captor, Jimmy, in the face. His attack was returned by one of the stormtroopers in the form of a blow to the jaw. The others grabbed his arms, strapping him into the metal cuffs.

The struggle was over, and he let out a strangled growl at what he knew would happen next.

Jimmy plunged the syringe into his neck once again, this time with the blue liquid, the hallucinogen. Ben glared at him, as he pushed the stop, injecting the liquid into his veins. He would not cry. He would not beg. To do so would be weakness. He merely fought to keep his mind, though he knew it was a useless endeavor.

"It's not real. It's not real," he muttered to himself before he slipped into the nightmare.

 _He ran through the halls of the Finalizer as fast as he could with Rey hot on his heels. Explosions rocked the ship, and he urged her to run faster as the walls were crumbling in on them. They ran, turning corner after corner, his lungs burning with the effort to keep breathing._

 _Another explosion rocked the ship, and he lost his balance, tumbling forward. The walls came down behind him, and he heard Rey cry out in pain and fear. He struggled to get up as the ground shook and he ran to her, desperation in his voice as he called her name._

 _"Ben!" she shouted to him, though her cry was weak. He dug through the rubble of the interior walls until he found her. She was buried under a foot of steel, a support beam impaling her midsection._

 _Blood was everywhere and he felt sick. Ben felt tears prickling at the corners of his eyes, but he managed to hold them back, only choking out a sob that came involuntarily._

 _"It's going to be okay," he lied to her, feeling his heart break as she smiled at him._

 _He pulled her from the rubble, using every bit of strength he had to move the steel off of her, and remove the support beam from her midsection. He cradled her small, broken frame to his chest, and ran desperately for the med bay as she bled out in his arms._

 _Rey tried to focus on him, but couldn't and her body began shaking violently. Ben shut them in the med bay, searching frantically for anything that could stop the bleeding, but knowing that it was already too late._

 _He felt her hand on his face, and looked down to see her smiling up at him weakly._

 _"Stay with me, Rey," he begged her, his normally steady voice coming out as a whimper._

 _"I love you," she whispered to him as her eyes flickered closed._

 _"No!" he panicked. "No, no…you can't… no!"_

 _Ben held her close, pressing his face in her hair as he had so many times before. Her body was limp, and his chest tightened painfully with the realization that she was dead. He sobbed into her hair, holding her tightly._

 _"It's not real," he sobbed. "None of this is real."_

 _But it_ felt _real._

 _He prepared himself as his surroundings morphed, this time putting him in Supreme Leader Snoke's presence._

 _Rey stood defiantly before him, and he struck her to the ground. Ben lunged for her, but was held back. He fought, but got nowhere._

 _Snoke used Force lightning on Rey, and Ben roared in anger as he watched her body jerk and smoke. Rey cried out in pain, and he found himself crying with her._

 _"It's not real," he whispered, trying to calm himself. "It's not real."_

 _But the tears spilled down his face, and he howled in agony anyway._

 _Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx_

Rey opened her eyes to near darkness, her head spinning and her entire body sore and painful. She heard the distant sound of screaming and cursing, but it all sounded strange and muffled. It was like she was in a dream, connected to this reality only by the pain that she felt.

It took her brain some time to process what had happened. She had been captured by the First Order. Tom was dead, and Ben… Her heart broke and a strangled sob escaped her as she thought of Ben.

She would never get to see him again. That thought alone hurt worse than any injury she had sustained.

Rey focused on her memories of him bringing them to the forefront of her mind. She recalled his handsome face, complete with the scar that she had given him. She remembered how his dark eyes sparkled with mischief, and the lopsided grin that he reserved only for her. She thought of his voice and his laugh, the sound deep and rich. The way he touched her, and the way his body felt against hers, leaving her begging for more every time.

The memories were painful, and tears burned her eyes, spilling over of their own volition, but she couldn't allow herself to forget. To forget him and the life they had shared would be a fate far worse than death.

He had told her that they should run, but she had been too stubborn to agree. It was her fault that he was dead.

"Ben," she whispered hoarsely. "We should have run. I'm so sorry."

"Ah, so you're finally awake," a woman's voice sounded out to the right of her position. "You were in the med bay for days. We didn't think you would make it. I heard that you were pretty torn up when they got you on board. I'm sure that you will be pleased to know that the ever impulsive, overconfident Kylo Ren still lives, though for how much longer I don't know. It was actually pretty funny."

She paused to chuckle to herself, as if she had just heard a joke. "I don't think he's taken his eyes off of you since they brought you in here. They had to keep him sedated at first. He was ready to rip their throats out because he thought you were dead. It's actually kind of cute in a sick sort of way. The great Kylo Ren, acting like a lovesick teenager. Even the strongest of us can be brought to our knees with the right push."

Rey forced her body to turn sideways on what seemed to be a small cot as the woman laughed again. It took a minute for her eyes to adjust and for her brain to process what had been said.

She saw a large woman with short blond hair on the other side of a wall of metal bars. She looked rough, and that was putting it lightly. Her clothes were disheveled, and she proudly sported a black eye. She laughed to herself, the sound carrying an almost mad and desperate air, like someone who had been pushed over the brink of what they could handle, and were no longer functioning in the same realm as the rest of the world.

Rey had never seen the woman before, and would have normally been more cautious, but at that moment in time she was too shocked to hold her tongue.

"Ben's alive?" she asked the woman hopefully.

"Unfortunately," she grunted in response. "Though I think that I could kill him myself if they were stupid enough to put him in the same cell with me."

"Where is he?" Rey demanded.

"Don't worry," the blond woman laughed bitterly, the edge the sound carried causing the hair to stand up on the back of Rey's neck. "He'll be back. They always bring him back. He's just in for his evening round of torture, that's all. They'll bring him back soon enough, and he'll stare at you for a good long while, just to remind himself that you're alive. They haven't broken him yet though. It's quite impressive, the things that he can withstand."

Rey's eyes widened in shock, and she pulled herself off of the cot. The movement was painful, her joints and muscles having become stiff from lack of movement, but she was not as torn up as she believed herself to be. She took a few steps, then sank to the ground, trying to catch her breath from the effort.

"Torture?" she questioned when she felt that she could finally speak.

"Oh yes," the blond woman scoffed. "Loads of fun. Orders from the Supreme Leader himself, but you wouldn't know anything about that. Snoke wants to meet you personally, and he's ordered that you aren't to be harmed until he says otherwise. How lucky for you…"

Rey was about to respond, when a door flung open, and light spilled into the darkness.

"I'll break you eventually," she heard a man's voice promise with venom. "It's only a matter of time."

"Don't hold your breath. I'll die before I give you the pleasure of breaking me," Ben's voice growled.

She looked up in time to see a man that she didn't know uncuff Ben and shove him into the cell on the other side of her. She moved to him, her steps painful and exhausting, but she made it to the bars that separated them.

The man who brought him in, turned his attention to the snarky blond woman she had been talking to previously.

"Hello Jimmy, you traitorous son of a bitch," she greeted him rudely.

"You know I didn't want this Phasma," the dark haired man told her, his voice wavering from the harsh tone he had used with Ben.

"Let's just get this over with," the blond, Phasma, sighed tiredly.

He cuffed her and led her out, treating her with a certain amount of gentleness that Rey found surprising.

She managed to look back and wink at Rey as she left.

"See you on the other side," she chuckled bitterly, and then she was gone, leaving Rey alone with Ben. He crawled to her, pressing his face against the bars that separated them.

"Are you alright?" he asked her immediately, his voice shaking slightly.

Instead of responding, Rey's lips met his, kissing him with need. She wrapped her arms around her arms around him as best she could through the bars and tangled her fingers in his messy, dark hair. She cried, she couldn't help it, and she felt his calloused fingers wipe away her tears.

"Please don't cry," he whispered softly between kisses. "I don't want you to cry."

"Ben," she sobbed happily. "I thought you were dead. I thought I would never see you again…"

"Come on now," he joked, trying to make light of their situation. "It'll take more than a little poison to kill me."

Rey tried to laugh, but it came out a sob. He was alive. They were both alive, and that was all that mattered to her.

Ben looked rough, his face pale and a large bruise adorning his jaw, along with various cuts and smaller bruises. Even with his beaten exterior, he still managed to give her a small smile.

The muffled sound of screams filled Rey's ears, and she winced involuntarily.

"It's Phasma," Ben commented sadly. "They're close to breaking her. She can't hang on much longer. With me I can tell myself that it's not real and that you'll be alive when I get back. When I see you, alive and breathing, I can shake the nightmares, and I know it's just a hallucination. Phasma doesn't have that. She has to watch whoever she loves the most die over and over again, and there's nothing she can do about it. She's starting to unravel."

"We have to get out of here," Rey mumbled. "There has to be a way out."

"It's over Rey," Ben said quietly, his calloused hands caressing her cheek softly. "They're injecting us with a syrum that diminishes our Force abilities, so escaping is out of the question, and when Supreme Leader Snoke arrives, he will want to personally oversee my execution. He might possibly allow you to live, but he will not spare my life."

"You're giving up," Rey said flatly, meeting his eyes fiercely. "You can't give up. I need you."

"No you don't," he snorted. "You can do just fine without me. You're strong, and I don't doubt for a minute that you can-"

"Ben, I'm pregnant," she interrupted quickly. His jaw dropped and his eyes widened in surprise at her declaration.

"Or at least I was before they took me," she amended softly.

"Rey, I-" Ben started, but then stopped, as though he didn't know what to say.

"I need you," Rey told him bluntly, looking him straight in the eyes and refusing to back down. "And our child needs you. You can't give up. You don't have that luxury. We live together, or we die together, but either way we fight, and we don't ever give up."

His dark eyes searched hers, both hope for the future, and despair for all that he believed would never be shining in them. Rey wanted more than anything to know his thoughts. She needed to see exactly how he felt, but she found herself unable to slip into his mind. She couldn't read his thoughts anymore than she could see through the darkness. It was several painfully long minutes later before he finally spoke.

"I'm going to be a father," Ben breathed, as though the thought both elated and terrified him.

"Promise me, Ben," Rey pushed. "Promise me you'll fight for us. I need to hear it from you."

"I'll fight," he promised her. "You have my word. You and this baby are my family, and I will protect you both until my dying breath."

Rey kissed him again through the bars, wishing that they could be closer.

"Tom didn't make it, did he?" Ben asked her suddenly, pulling back to meet her eyes. There was a sadness on his face that she felt mirrored in her own. Tom was a good man, and he would be missed dearly by them both.

"I knew he was gone when I saw Jimmy carrying my lightsaber," Ben mused.

"Yeah," Rey said softly. "He came for me. We tried to run, but got pinned down by stormtroopers. He covered me while I ran to the woods. I didn't see him die, but somehow I know that he did."

Ben nodded sadly. "Did he say anything to you?"

"No," Rey answered, thinking the question strange, but then remembering the napkin he had given her. "He gave me a napkin though, and told me to read it later before I ran."

"You need to read it," he said simply. "I could tell you what it says, but it would be better coming from him."

Rey reached into her pocket, and pulled out the crumpled napkin she had shoved in there before she was taken. She smoothed it out, curious as to what could be so important, and began reading.

 _My dearest Rey,_

 _I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me. What I'm about to say may shock you, but I can no longer in good conscience keep the truth from you. You know me as Tom the farmer, but my true name is Tom Kenobi. My father, Obi-Wan Kenobi, had a brief relationship with my mother after being injured in the Clone Wars. He left never knowing that I was alive._

 _I grew up a farmer as I told you, leaving my home planet to settle down with a beautiful young woman named Niera. We lived on Jakku for some time, and we had a daughter that we loved very much. That daughter, Rey, was you._

 _It was never my intention to leave you all alone, or to hurt you as I have. I only ever wanted to love you and look out for you as any good father should. Unfortunately, with the rise of the First Order as we know it now, it was not a good time for anyone who was Force sensitive._

 _I was forced to leave you alone on Jakku in order to save your life. It was not my choice, and I regret it every single day._

 _Your mother was killed when the First Order soldiers came for me. I wish that I could have been stronger, and I wish that I could have done something to save her. She died in my arms, and all I had left was you._

 _I tried to go back for you, I truly did, but they were watching me. Fearful that they would kill you as they had your mother, I never went back for you. I watched you from afar, keeping tabs on you by calling in favors from friends. It was never enough, but in order to keep you safe, it was the best that I could do._

 _When I heard that you ran to Naboo with Kylo Ren, I feared for your life, enough so that I decided to intervene. Ben is not the monster that I thought he was. He is a good man who loves you very much, and I know that he will take care of you._

 _I want to be a part of your life more than anything, and I hope that you will understand and forgive me for not being there for you in the past. If you will not forgive me, I understand, and I will leave you be._

 _Just know that no matter what you choose, I love you very much, and I am so proud of the woman that you have become._

 _-Tom_

Rey put the napkin down, her hands shaking.

"How long did you know about this?" she asked Ben, tears welling up in her eyes.

"He told me the day before we were taken," he replied honestly. "I wanted to tell you so badly, but it wasn't my place. It needed to come from him. I'm sorry he didn't get the chance to tell you in person, and I'm sorry that he's gone. Tom was a good man, and he loved you very much."

Rey didn't know if she should laugh or cry. She had spent her entire life waiting on her family to come back for her, searching for them day in and day out, until searching and waiting was all that she knew. She had eventually accepted that they were gone, but like everything else in her life she had been wrong about that too. Her dad was alive, and he had been looking out for her all this time. She got to meet him. She had the privilege of knowing him, getting to talk with him almost every day, making him a part of her family.

He was going to tell her. She would have known if he had lived only a day longer. She would forgiven him of course, and accepted him. They could have lived out their lives getting to know each other and spending time together. Perhaps, in time, she would have even called him dad, but he had been taken from her before she ever had the chance to know that she was never alone. Life could be a real bitch sometimes.

She saw Ben watching her, waiting for her to say something, anything. He worried for her, hurting when she hurt, and Rey loved him even more for it. Finally, when she felt that she had composed herself, she verbalized the only thing that mattered.

"I had a father," she said in wonder. "I was never alone, because he was looking out for me. I actually got to meet him, and he was a part of my life. I can't believe it."

Tears fell from her eyes, and Ben reached through the bars to take her hand in his. He didn't have to say anything, because there was nothing to say. Rey closed her eyes, feeling the warmth from Ben as he held her hand tightly. She had a husband, a child, and a father. She had a family, even if they were broken. They would make it out of here, they had to. Tom was gone, but she could still save Ben and their child. Somehow she would figure it out. Somehow they would make it home.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next day, Rey was cuffed and dragged from her cell to stand before the oldest and ugliest man that she had ever seen in her life. The Supreme Leader was hideous, and the predatory look he was giving her made her physically sick.

"Kneel before the Supreme Leader," Jimmy commanded her.

She glared at him, before turning her attention back to Snoke.

"Thanks, but I'll stand," she declared bravely.

Supreme Leader Snoke chuckled at her response, his wrinkled face contorting with the effort.

"Spirited little thing," he drawled slowly, in a voice that made Rey's skin crawl. "I see why Ren likes you so much. I like you too."

He looked her up and down in an almost carnal way, and Rey found her determination wavering. She wished that Ben was with her. She needed his support and stability desperately.

"Fifty-seven of my finest fighters died at your hands," Snoke continued. "Your skills are quite impressive. They rival, if not exceed those of Kylo Ren. I'm going to be blunt with you, Rey. I want you for myself. I need to take on a new apprentice, and I have chosen you."

"And if I refuse?" Rey dared.

Snoke chuckled once again, the mere sound of his voice making her skin crawl with disgust.

"It would not be wise for you to refuse," he drawled slowly. "I am offering to spare your life and the life of your child."

Rey's confidence faltered at the revelation. He knew. She didn't know how, perhaps he read her mind, but he knew.

"I know all, Rey," he confirmed. "You will soon come to know that. I assume that Ren is the father, though the child will be valuable to me even if he is not. I am offering you a chance at life, and I suggest that you take it. Should you refuse, I will keep you alive only long enough to take your child from you, after which I will dispatch you. I lost my apprentice to lust for you. The debt must be paid, either by you or your child, though I would prefer to have you. Much quicker return for my investment."

"If I do this," Rey began, taking a step towards him as her anger caused her confidence to return. "I have a few demands of my own."

"You do not get to make demands of the Supreme Leader," Jimmy snarled next to her.

"Silence," Snoke commanded him harshly. "I feel your anger, Rey, and it makes you powerful. You have so much potential… You have only to unlock it, and you will be unstoppable. I will hear your demands, and if I deem them fair, I will accommodate you."

Rey met his eyes boldly, pushing all fear and doubt from her mind. She never looked away from him. To look away was to show weakness, and she couldn't afford to show weakness now.

"I will take my place as your apprentice, on the condition that you spare Ben's life… and Phasma's as well," she added, remembering the snarky blond who had tried to protect them.

"I'll admit you have courage," Snoke drawled. "But that I cannot do. Both Kylo Ren and Phasma have betrayed me. The punishment for treason is death. How will I look to my men if I don't follow through with their executions? I will seem weak, and I cannot allow that to happen. Ren and Phasma must both die, though your decision may determine how quick their deaths will be. Think on it, Rey. I will expect an answer from you tomorrow."

He turned to Jimmy and waved him off, at which time Rey found herself being pushed from the room.

"I can walk on my own," she snapped at him, which only seemed to make him push her harder.

If she had her Force abilities, she would make sure he never touched her again, but as it was now, she was powerless. If they had any hope of escaping, both she and Ben would need the Force.

Suddenly, an idea came to her. It was a long shot, and it was ugly, but it was an idea nonetheless. It would require her, Ben, and Phasma to all work together, which might prove difficult. It would take tons of skill, luck, and an absolute miracle to pull off, but it was a plan, and at this point they had nothing to lose.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

When Rey arrived back at her cell, she filled both Ben and Phasma in on what had happened, leaving nothing out. She told them that Snoke wanted her as his apprentice. She told them what would happen if she refused. She talked about the bargain she had tried to strike and when she was certain that Jimmy was nowhere near, she divulged her plan of escape to them as well.

Ben practically beamed with pride as she spoke of how she made demands of the Supreme Leader and how she had come up with a plausible plan all on her own. Phasma, on the other hand, looked more and more disgusted with every word.

"No," Phasma said flatly when she was done. "I'm not doing that."

"Please," Rey begged her. "I know it's a lot to ask of you, but I wouldn't ask if I didn't think it could work. You're the only one that could pull it off. It won't work with me or Ben. It has to be you. Please."

"Find another way, 'cause there's no way in hell I'm doing that."

"Phasma," Ben cut in. "We need you. We have one day left to live. We don't have time to come up with another plan. It's this, or we die."

"Maybe I want to die," she mused. "For you the nightmare ends. You can come back here. You can see Rey alive, and you can tell yourself it's not real. For me it _is_ real. There is no end. The person I love the most is dead. I have nothing left, and I can't go on like this. Death would be a mercy for me."

"Please," Ben asked of her. "I'm begging you. I want to live, and if you won't do it for me, then do it for Rey. She's innocent, and she's everything good that I can never be. Please, Phasma. We can do this, but we need you."

"The great Kylo Ren begs for my help," Phasma chuckled bitterly. "I never thought I'd see the day…"

"Please," he asked again, and Rey joined him.

"I hate you both," Phasma grunted. "If I do this, and I'm not saying that I will, you both owe me. Whatever I ask for, no matter how trivial or ridiculous it is, you will give it me. And when you _do_ give it to me, you will do so with a smile on your face and a 'yes ma'am.' Understand?"

"Understood," they both affirmed.

"And I have another demand as well," she continued. "Jimmy's mine. Either of you assholes try to kill him and you'll regret being born. Am I clear?"

"Crystal," Rey nodded.

"I'll do it," Phasma mumbled. "But when this is over, you owe me, and I expect compensation for what I'm about to do. The amount of therapy I'll need for this shit is going to cost me a fortune."

"Thank you," Rey said gratefully, smiling at her.

"If this doesn't work," Ben interjected, taking Rey's hand through the bars. "I want you to take Snoke's deal."

Rey was about to argue, but he stopped her with a look.

"Promise me, Rey. Promise me you'll take the deal and save yourself and our baby."

His dark eyes met her hazel ones with a harsh intensity that she wasn't used to.

"Promise me. Right now."

"I promise," Rey agreed reluctantly.

"If this doesn't work, I'll kill you both before Snoke even has a chance to."

"Shut up Phasma," Ben growled.

This was going to work. It had to.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jimmy escorted Phasma back for her evening session of torture. As usual, he was gentle with her, making sure that her cuffs weren't too tight, and guiding her out of her cell gently. He never pushed, just placed one hand on the small of her back and guided her.

She knew what had to be done and she felt sick. She hated Jimmy, more than anything and anyone in the entire world, but somehow she had to overcome that hatred and seduce him.

The very idea disgusted her, but she knew that Rey's plan was plausible. It could work, but only if she did this. Only she could pull off this part.

Jimmy went to cuff her to the table, as was his custom, but she stopped him with a look.

"I'm sorry Jimmy," she told him suddenly. "I'm sorry for rejecting you and reporting you to Snoke. I should have given you a chance, it's just that… well… I didn't think you were going anywhere until now."

Jimmy gave her a startled glace, clearly not believing what he heard, and Phasma fought hard against the urge to strike him.

"It's true," she added. "I underestimated you. I thought you weren't good enough for me because you had no ambition, but I was wrong. You certainly are ambitious…"

She dragged her eyes up and down his body carefully, and she saw him shiver under her gaze. She tried not to let her disgust show. She couldn't afford to fail.

Jimmy didn't seem to notice her internal battle. He was far too focused on her words and the way her eyes traveled up and down his body.

"You mean…" he began hopefully. "You would give me a chance now?"

"Absolutely," Phasma lied. "Unfortunately, I won't be alive for much longer."

Jimmy frowned, as if just realizing the implications of his actions.

"I could talk to the Supreme Leader," he offered. "Perhaps I could get him to spare you."

"Perhaps," Phasma echoed his thoughts. "But if he refuses, then tonight will be my last night."

Jimmy pressed his lips to hers, and Phasma tried to hide her disgust as she kissed him back. It was terrible, and she wanted nothing more than to bite down on his tongue, but she played her part, and she played it well.

"I want you so badly," he murmured against her mouth.

"Then take me," Phasma encouraged him.

An hour later Phasma found herself in Jimmy's shower, scrubbing her skin raw with soap and scalding water.

"So much therapy," she mumbled to herself. "Therapy for years to get over this…"

When she was finished scrubbing herself raw, she exited the shower and dried herself with one of his clean towels. She found his toothbrush sitting next to the sink, and she gave it a quick dip in the toilet before placing it back where it was.

"Bastard," she mumbled as she went into his closet and dressed herself in some of his clean clothes. She put on a standard First Order uniform and found a thin jacket with a hood, which she also wore.

When she walked back into his bedroom, Jimmy was passed out on the bed, naked and unresponsive.

Phasma grabbed his key card from the nightstand, along with his First Order credit card, pack of cigarettes, and lighter. She shoved the items in her pockets and exited his quarters quietly.

She pulled the hood of his jacket up and over her face as she walked, wandering the halls of the Finalizer with purpose. She kept walking through the winding hallways, taking the less used routes to avoid drawing attention to herself until she found the med bay/laboratory.

"Phasma entered using Jimmy's key card and was pleased to find the place empty. She went through the vials in the medicine cabinet until she found the two that she was looking for.

The blue liquid was the hallucinogen. There were no other blue liquids in the cabinet. She couldn't swap it out. He would know. Phasma shuddered involuntarily at the thought of having to endure the nightmares again.

 _One more time_ , she thought to herself. After that, she would either be victorious or Snoke would end her, but either way she would be free.

Phasma found the clear vial, the one with the Force inhibiting drug. She injected a syringe into the vial and pulled all of the liquid out, dumping the contents into the sink. She then proceeded to refill the vial with saline solution.

With any luck, Jimmy would never notice and they could go into the fight that they were going to pick with the upper hand.

Phasma locked the med bay door back as she left and returned to Jimmy's quarters. He was still out as she had hoped. She returned the key card as she had found it, but she kept the rest of the things she had taken.

She sat on the edge of his bed as far away from him as she could get, and lit up a cigarette as she watched him sleep. As she took a long drag, inhaling the smoke into her lungs, she thought about killing Jimmy. It would be so easy. She could smother him or slit his throat and it would be over before he knew what was happening.

She suppressed the urge, knowing that he needed to live for one more day.

"Soon," she promised his sleeping form with malice, as she took another drag on one of her stolen cigarettes.

Tears found their way down her face in disgust of what she had done, only the promise of revenge giving her any hope for the future.

When Jimmy finally woke up, he escorted Phasma back to her cell, but the gentleness he used with her was not lost.

"I'll talk to Snoke tomorrow," he promised her. "I'll get you out of this. Just hang on for one more night."

"Thank you," Phasma mumbled.

He opened the door to the room they were keeping her in, and paused for a moment. His eyes took her in, as though he had never truly looked at her before, and she paled under his gaze.

"The serum I've been injecting you with is supposed to give you hallucinations about the people you love the most dying," he said suddenly, almost fearfully. "If you don't mind me asking, who do you see in yours?"

"You want the truth, or do you want me to lie to you?" she asked bluntly.

"The truth," Jimmy replied, but his eyes told her that he was afraid of what she would say.

"Hux," she admitted sadly, before walking away to enter her cell. "It's always Hux."

Phasma waited until she heard the door slam shut before she addressed Rey and Ben.

"I hate you both."

She lay on her cot and turned away from them, trying to sleep, but knowing that she wouldn't be able to.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ben found that he was unable to tear his eyes away from Rey. She was beautiful in every way.

Her hazel eyes were alight with fire, and her dark hair was pulled back in her usual three bun style, messy and enticing at the same time. The way she smiled at him and only him, her cheeks slightly flushed and her smile shy even after all this time, was enough to break him.

It had always been her, and it would always be her. No one else would ever be enough.

He shook his head, trying to expel the nightmares. Images of Rey and their baby dying slow and horrible deaths had been introduced by the toxin. It wasn't real. He knew that, but it still felt real.

Ben took one deep breath after another, trying to fight the panic rising up in him. And then Rey was there.

She touched him gently, letting her fingers graze his jaw. He trembled under her touch, and he felt himself grow calmer. She was perfection. She was his angel, the love of his life, and the only thing that mattered to him.

"Ben," she whispered, touching him to assure him that she was real. He needed that reassurance, and somehow she knew.

"It's okay Ben. This is going to work. Can you feel it?"

And he did feel it. The Force was returning to him, ready to do his bidding. Phasma had come through for them. They had a real chance now.

Ben looked at Rey, memorizing her every feature and knowing that if their plan didn't work, this would be the last moment he had with her.

"Don't look at me like that," she commanded him sternly. "This isn't the end."

"I hope you're right," he mumbled, leaning into her touch and closing his eyes. He breathed in her scent like a drowning man, desperate for a last breath of air.

 _Have a little faith in me_ Rey chastised him through her thoughts.

 _I have faith in you_ he thought back to her. _I only hope that I can be strong enough for what is to come. Snoke is powerful._

 _Maybe so. But together we are more powerful._

Ben kissed her softly on the lips, and rested his forehead against hers through the bars.

The door opened suddenly, bathing them in light from the outside. Jimmy stepped in, followed by a squad of stormtroopers.

"The Supreme Leader has requested your presence," Jimmy announced. "All of you."

"I can't wait," Phasma said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

The stormtroopers raised their blasters at them, ensuring that they would stay still, while Jimmy cuffed them all one at a time. They were led down the halls of the Finalizer, flanked on all sides by guards, and being led like cattle to the slaughter.

As they arrived at their destination, Ben pressed his lips to Rey's, hoping that it would not be for the last time. He tasted her, memorizing the way her lips felt against his, until a stormtrooper pushed them apart. He was rewarded with a small smile from Rey, and he felt the courage that he so desperately needed within grasp.

Snoke was waiting for them inside, still as terrifying as he had ever been. The stormtroopers left at Snoke's dismissal, leaving the three of them alone with Jimmy and Snoke.

"Have you made your decision, Rey?" Snoke drawled slowly.

Rey stepped forward fearlessly, and Ben felt his chest swell with pride. She was _his_ Rey and _his_ wife. If anyone could do this, she could.

"Supreme Leader Snoke," Rey addressed him, looking him directly in the eye. She took a knee before him, and then stood, never breaking eye contact.

Snoke looked her up and down, and Ben felt a jealous rage spark inside of him. Whatever happened here, he was going to kill Snoke, even if it cost him his life.

"I accept your deal," Rey told him boldly.

"Good," Snoke purred. "Very good my new apprentice."

Rey's cuffs fell off of her, and she rubbed her wrists vigorously.

"You will no longer be treated as a prisoner. You are now under my personal protection. Your Force abilities should return to you within a day or two, at which point we will begin your training."

Snoke tossed her a lightsaber, which Ben recognized as hers. Rey caught it easily.

"I do require a show of your loyalty," Snoke added, his gaze falling to Ben. "Prove that you are loyal to myself and to the First Order. I want you to take Kylo Ren's life, just as you are taking his place, right here where I can watch."

If Rey was shocked, she didn't show it. She ignited her lightsaber and came to stand beside him.

"Kneel," Snoke commanded him, and Ben felt the Force pushing him down. He knelt before Rey, meeting her eyes with his own.

"I love you," he mouthed, and in response Rey simply said "I know."

"Kylo Ren," Snoke growled. "I had hoped for better from you. You had so much… potential … and you've wasted it for _love._ "

He said the last word with a strange amount of disgust, his tone practically oozing with hatred.

"See where love has taken you, Kylo Ren. You are weak and pathetic, and now you will pay the price for betraying me. Rey, the time is now."

Rey briefly glanced at Phasma, who was standing next to Jimmy, before raising her lightsaber to swing.

It happened fast.

Phasma lunged, throwing her cuffed hands around Jimmy's neck to strangle him. Snoke looked away for a split second, which was all Ben needed.

He broke his cuffs with the Force, and summoned his lightsaber from Jimmy's belt, igniting it the second it reached his palm.

Time slowed down as adrenaline kicked in, the hum of his crimson blade the only thing he heard as he aimed for Snoke.

Ben blocked a round of Force lightning with his blade, staggering back from the blow. Rey joined the fray, pushing the Force back at Snoke, trying to knock him off balance. He retaliated on her, and she blocked with her lightsaber, struggling to hold him back.

Ben fought against the lightning, pushing his blade to the limit. He felt the rage that had been sparking in him fan to a full flame. He had to do this. He had to do this for himself, for Rey, and for their child. Failure was not an option.

He let out a feral roar, and pushed harder, gaining ground. Snoke's eyes widened in shock at his strength, and Ben used the Supreme Leader's confusion to his advantage.

He swung hard, burying his lightsaber into Snoke. The older man fell, screeching in pain. Ben stood over him, his face contorted in rage, and raised his crimson blade. The glow bathed him in a surreal light, and all he could feel was hate for the man who had tried to take everything from him.

"Ren," Snoke pleaded. "We can talk about this. You don't have to kill me."

"On this day, the apprentice becomes the master," Ben snarled. "I will protect what is mine, no matter the cost. It ends now."

He plunged the lightsaber into Supreme Leader Snoke, and took great pleasure in watching the light leave his eyes. He might be a broken monster, but he would protect his family, even if that meant that he would never have the chance to regain his humanity.

Ben extinguished his blade, breathing hard, and trying not to cry. It was over. It was all over. They were safe.

Suddenly, Rey was there, throwing her arms around him. He pulled her into his chest and buried his face in her hair, breathing in her scent; the very scent of life itself.

 _Are you okay?_ He pushed his thoughts to her.

Rey wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deeply in response, her tears of joy only surpassed by his.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rey snuggled against his chest, their naked bodies entwined beneath the black, silk sheets.

They had taken up residence in the room Ben had once used as Kylo Ren. He chuckled a little bit, remembering how shocked Rey had been at the size of his quarters. She had especially enjoyed his shower, and all of the scented shampoos he had.

"So that's why your hair is always so pretty!" she had laughed, and he had laughed with her.

The smile that lit up her face had unleashed a fierce need within him, and he had taken her several times, before they had both become too exhausted to continue. He could have made love to her all night long, if his strength wasn't so drained. Instead, they had settled for a few rounds, a hot shower, and the close contact they now shared.

All was right in his world. Snoke was dead. Rey was alive and happy, and the ship's medic had been glad to inform them both that their baby was fine as well. All he could ever want, he had, and he couldn't imagine life being any better.

"So what do you think?" Rey asked him, pulling him from his thoughts.

"Hmmm?" he grunted.

"What do you think about what Phasma said?" she clarified.

"I don't know," Ben answered honestly. "I could don the mask and become Kylo Ren again, lead the First Order, try to bring peace between the First Order and the Resistance."

"You were born for this," Rey sighed. "You would be a great leader, and it would be the best thing for the galaxy if you took over the First Order."

"I don't care about what's best for the galaxy," Ben snorted, noting her hesitation. He met her eyes, needing to know exactly what she was thinking, and wanting her to know the depth of his love for her

"I only care about what's best for you. What do _you_ want? Ask anything of me, and I'll do it for you."

"I want…" Rey began thoughtfully, running her fingers through his dark curls. "I want to go back to Naboo and live by the lake with my husband, Ben. I want to raise our child there, and grow crops, and fish. And most importantly, I want to love you for the rest of our lives, until we grow old and die together. That's what I want."

Ben placed a kiss on her forehead and tightened his grip on her.

"Then that's what we'll do," he replied simply. "Phasma can take the lead here, and we will go home."

"Thank you," Rey whispered, smiling at him.

As Ben looked at his wife, he knew without a doubt that he would spend every day for the rest of his life trying to make her smile exactly as she was now. He would do whatever it took, because she was worth it.

He kissed her deeply, his tongue fighting hers for control as he sought entrance to her mouth. Once again they melded together through the Force, his thoughts and fears becoming hers. He loved her, and he loved their unborn child, but he feared that he would be too weak, that he could never be enough for them. Should he prove to be as bad a father as Han Solo was to him, would Rey still love him? Could he be any better, or was history doomed to repeat itself?

 _You're enough_ her thoughts came through to him clearly, becoming his own. _You will always be enough for me, no matter what. You once told me that we make our own destiny, and that our choices are ours to make and ours alone. You can be as good a father as you want to be. The choice is yours. History does not have to repeat itself._

He would be enough. He had to.

Ben felt himself overcome with want for her once again, and he rolled her over, straddling her hips, and pushed himself inside of her.

Rey moaned his name as he took her, both her body and her mind. His beautiful wife. His to love and to care for until the end of their days. He would be better than his father, he vowed to both himself and to Rey. Whatever it took, he would be better.

As he climaxed, he looked into Rey's hazel eyes, and he knew that he didn't need the galaxy at his fingertips to be happy. All he needed was her.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Phasma sat at the desk in her quarters sending out a few last minute instructions to her fellow officers aboard the Finalizer.

It was all hers. The entire First Order was at her disposal. Kylo Ren, or Ben, as he called himself now, had given it all to her and gone back to Naboo with Rey. Truthfully she envied the bastard. Somehow he always got whatever he wanted, but someone had to be a grown up here. The First Order wouldn't run itself after all…

She dressed in her new battle armor. It was made of titanium, and supposed to be indestructible, a gift from Ben. She had quite a few gifts from Ben. Her quarters had been completely redone in the finest of materials. Her new shower was to die for, along with more shampoos and soaps than she knew what to do with.

Her entire arsenal of weaponry was beautiful. The best and strongest of everything, with more blasters and knives than she would ever be able to use in a lifetime. She had acquired enough credits to set her up for life on whatever planet she wanted, and several vacation homes for when she needed to get away.

A miniature house set in the corner of her quarters, and Millicent came out to get one last scratch behind the ears before Phasma had to leave. Her diamond studded collar shined as she jumped up on the bed.

"Good girl Millie," Phasma cooed, as she rubbed the orange tabby.

The cat purred, and Phasma smiled as she scratched her behind the ears.

A knock sounded at her door, and Phasma heard the voice of one of her most trusted officers outside.

"Commander Phasma," she called out hesitantly. "The new General is here to meet you."

Phasma gave Millie one last rub before she headed out to meet her new General. She had hand selected him for his fantastic record on both the battlefield and in strategy as well. He was exactly what she wanted, and she hoped that the familiarity would help her settle into her new role.

When she arrived in the comm center, a tall redhead turned to meet her, giving her a shy grin, and she was immediately struck by how much he reminded her of his brother.

"General Hux," she greeted the man before her. "I hope you are finding your accommodations aboard the Finalizer to be sufficient for your needs."

"Very," he grinned, giving her a once over before stepping forward to shake her hand.

"John Hux," he introduced himself. "And I must say that it's a pleasure to finally meet you, Commander. Bernard never stopped talking about you. You're practically a legend at our house."

He grinned, his smile infectious, and Phasma found herself smiling at him as well.

"Please," she found herself speaking before she could stop. "Call me Brienne."

"Alright Brienne," he said casually, his blue eyes sparkling. Only then did Phasma realize that she had been shaking his hand for far too long. She quickly let it go, and cleared her throat.

"Well then. I'll show you around if you like," she offered.

"I would like that very much."

The two of them walked together down the halls of the Finalizer, talking business and reminiscing on the loss of a man that they had both loved. It was a new beginning to a new era, and the First Order would soon be taking a new direction.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Poe Dameron and Jessika Pava made their way up a cliff that never seemed to end. They had found the planet that Luke Skywalker had left the map, and they had been busy trying to find him for the last several days.

"Can we give up on life now?" Poe groaned, as the cliff kept rising up ahead of them.

"Shut up and keep climbing," Jessika teased, giving him a little push. "We're almost there."

And they were. They came to the top of the cliff sooner than Poe had expected, and they saw an man standing on the edge, looking out over the water.

He was older, but not decrepit. His beard was tinged with both dark and gray hairs, and his hair hung almost to his shoulders. His clothes were worn, and he looked as though he spent most of his time out in nature. He turned to face them, before they could speak, as though he had known that they would be there.

"Poe Dameron and Jessika Pava," he greeted softly. "I've been waiting for you two for a long time."

They both stood and stared, too afraid to even speak.

"I'm Luke Skywalker," the man continued. "Or I used to be. Perhaps you've heard of me."

"Heard of you?" Poe exclaimed, finally finding his voice. "Dude, you're a legend! We came here to find you, because the Resistance needs your help."

"Supreme Leader Snoke is dead," Luke told them with surety, as he moved to stand in front of them. "I can feel it in the Force. Kylo Ren is also no more. He is alive, but has found peace. Neither will be a threat to the Resistance. The First Order will be taking a new direction. What kind of direction I cannot say, but their leadership has changed."

"How do you know all of this?" Jessika asked him. "You say you can feel it in the Force, but how do you know?"

"I don't," he said simply. "I just trust my instincts, and what I can feel. Go and message your friends from the Resistance. I guarantee that you will find what I'm saying to be true."

"If it's true," Poe ventured cautiously. "Then what now? Does the Resistance disband? Do we grow stronger? We need leadership desperately. That's why we came for you."

"I know," Luke acknowledged. "And I will give you that leadership, but for now we watch and we wait. I want to see what the First Order plans to do, and then we can make a move if we need to. As long as there is a First Order, there will always be a Resistance to oppose them. When the time is right we will come out of hiding, but for now we wait."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 **One year later**

Ben and Rey lay in the grass by the lake on Naboo as the sun set, their bodies tangled together, as they were on so many nights.

They talked about the future, having put the past behind them some time ago. Ben was grateful for that. A fresh start, and a new life with everything he ever wanted.

Their son, Tom, played on a blanket in the grass next to them, his small coos making them both smile. The boy was perfect. He had a mess of curly, black hair on his tiny head, and hazel eyes to rival his mother's. Ben never knew that he could love a tiny child so much, until he had held Tom in his arms. He wondered how his own father could have ever left him, even for a second, and he vowed to be better, not just for himself, but for Tom.

"Did you see the card Phasma sent us?" Rey asked him, laughing.

"Nope," he grinned. "But I'm sure it was over the top, and ridiculous as usual."

"It had a picture of her with the biggest blaster I've ever seen," Rey laughed. "And underneath it said 'My new toy that you bought me. In case you were wondering, I still hate you.' I saved it for you," she added. "Thought you might need a good laugh."

"She's definitely amusing,"

"Do you miss it?" Rey asked him suddenly. "The First Order?"

"Not at all," Ben replied honestly, grinning at her. "My place is here, with you and Tom. Besides, I think the galaxy will get on just fine without Kylo Ren. Phasma's doing a good job, and the First Order and Resistance are on the verge of peace talks. They don't need me, and I'm much happier here."

"Tell me again about what you're going to do with the crops this year," Rey prompted him, changing the subject. "You better plant me some corn. You know that's my favorite."

"Of course I will," Ben assured her, pulling her to him and kissing her forehead gently. "For you, I would do anything."

They stayed out by the lake and watched the sunset until the last of the light slipped below the water, and then they watched the stars. They talked of the future, which had never seemed so bright, and they made love beneath the night sky.

Everything was right. Everything was as it should be. Whatever the future held for them, they would accept it gladly, because together, they were unstoppable.

 **The End**

 **So…. Is it too late to tell you guys that I love happy endings? Maybe. If you hate me for making you miserable throughout most of this story, I completely understand, though I do hope that you will forgive me ; )**

 **I could have gone on for eternity with this story, but I've got heifers due to calve any day, several hundred quail in barn and a novel that I need to put the finishing touches on, along with all of my other responsibilities, so I had to end this somewhere!**

 **I hope that all of you have enjoyed reading this as much as I've enjoyed writing it! If you enjoyed this story, please take the time to leave me a comment! I love to hear from you, and your feedback makes it worth all of the time I've put into this. Thank you to everyone who has been supportive of this story in any way. You guys are the best! Reylo forever! Xoxoxoxo**

 **Lots of love to you all**

 **-Boss**


	8. Full Circle

**Hey you guys! I didn't think I would add any more to this story, but the overwhelming amount of people who have followed, favorited, and commented on this story asking for more have changed my mind.**

 **I apologize for the delay, but I have been completing my very first novel in my absence from this site. It is now finished, and I have no idea what to do with it…at all… ha! If anyone has any info on publishing options (an agent you use, where the best place to publish is etc…) any info would be appreciated as I determine how to move forward from here.**

 **Before we begin, I just want to say thank you again for all of your support! I appreciate each and every one of you! My family is somewhat supportive, but they're not really interested in my writing, so you guys have been the ones to help me grow as a writer, and I'm so thankful for that.**

 **Anyways… without further ado, here is the epilogue to Her Darkness, His Light. Enjoy!**

 **Epilogue: Full Circle**

 _A loud humming crackle filled the air, crimson spilling out across the darkness. The voice that had haunted him for almost a month now invaded his head once again._

 _It was deep and gravelly, yet somehow managed to infiltrate his thoughts with a strange, silky seduction._

 _"Kylo Ren," the voice sneered._

 _"No," he denied for what felt like the hundredth time. "Kylo Ren is dead. There is only Ben now."_

 _"Fool," the voice answered him. "Kylo Ren is not dead. He is merely buried in the weak and disgusting form you have taken. You were once a god among men, but now you are pathetic. Playing house with that…woman…pretending to be something that you are not. You were meant for more than the pathetic existence that you've chosen."_

 _Ben felt something inside him stirring, old feelings, anger, lust for blood, hatred. Visions of power played before him. A galaxy with him as its ruler, everything he could ever want laid out before him. All of the feelings he had fought so hard to bury came swimming to the surface._

 _"No," he said again, his voice a snarl. "Tempt me all you want, but my answer is still no. That part of my life is over."_

 _"Then so be it," the voice sneered with finality. "The Force must be balanced with or without you. If not you, then I will find another."_

Ben awoke gasping for air, his lungs on fire, and his head spinning between dream and reality. A cold sheen of sweat covered his body, and he thrashed out at an unseen enemy. A hand grabbed his shoulder, soft but firm, and another gently stroked his face.

"Ben," Rey soothed, the mere sound of her voice calming him and slowing the erratic beat of his heart. "Was it the dream again?" she asked softly.

"Yes."

He felt her hands gently smooth over his face, and he became lost in her touch. His dark eyes swept over her lovingly. She was _his_ Rey, hiswife, and the mother of his children. Despite their many years together, she was still as beautiful to him as she had been when he first met her. Ben pulled her to him, allowing the feel of her skin against his to calm him further.

"It was a dream," she reminded him, pressing her lips to his softly. "Nothing more."

He raised a shaky hand an entwined it in her hair, pulling her in for a harder, more desperate kiss. He breathed Rey in as if he were a drowning man, crushing her soft lips under his, and deepening the kiss with his tongue. When they pulled apart for air, she gently smoothed the worry lines between his brows with her thumb and forefinger.

"I never doubted you," she smiled. "You're stronger than your demons."

"It's only because of you," Ben replied sheepishly. "My demons are pretty persuasive. I do think that he's giving up on me though."

"Oh?"

"He said that if I wouldn't do it, he would find another."

"Good," Rey sighed. "Let's bury the past and get back to our life. I don't want to give you up. Balance of the Force can be someone else's problem this time."

"As long as I'm alive, you will never have to give me up," he told her reassuringly. "I am yours for all eternity."

Rey smiled at him, the beauty of the gesture igniting a fire within him, and when her lips met his again, he forgot all about his dream and the Force. All that mattered was the woman he had loved for almost two decades. She was his, and that was all that he cared about.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"It's Friday today," the teenage girl muttered dully as she picked at her breakfast of fruit. "Not that it matters anyway since we live out here in BFE." She rolled her hazel eyes in annoyance as the young man who sat across from her groaned.

"You have the worst attitude ever. Talking to you is worse than having my legs chewed off by a hungry wampa. And what does BFE mean anyways? That's the dumbest acronym I've ever heard."

"Playing in the dirt all day has made you such a social prude," she sighed. "BFE stands for butt fu- hey mom!" the teenager recovered, her pale face turning scarlet. "I was just telling Tom that we need to go into town this weekend."

Across the table from her Tom laughed openly, pushing his dark hair out of his face as his hazel eyes shone with mirth. Rey shook her head in feigned disgust, and pointed a finger at her daughter.

"What have I told you about your language, Leia? And you-" she turned her eyes to Tom, who was still laughing at his sister's blunders. He shut up immediately as his mother's eyes bored down on him. "Your father wants you outside. Now."

"Yes ma'am," Tom mumbled before downing the remainder of his breakfast, and scurrying outside, all laughter forgotten.

Now it was Leia's turn to laugh, and she did so happily, her dark curls bouncing against her face as she began to pick at her food again. Rey got herself some breakfast, and joined her daughter at the table.

"Mom…" Leia asked Rey hesitantly, not sure of where to begin.

Rey turned her attention to her daughter, knowing that she had a question to ask, and fearing what it would be. The girl's questions and interests as of late had been concerning to her. They had been mostly about the dark side, and what Rey thought their power was capable of. At first she had written it off as a simple curiosity, but the questions had become more and more frequent.

"I've been saving up for the last couple of years," Leia began slowly, her eyes locked on her mother. "And I want to buy a ship and go exploring."

"That sounds like a good way to get yourself in trouble," Rey frowned. "If you want to see the galaxy, I'll send you to stay with your Aunt Brienne and Uncle John for awhile, or you can even go stay with your great Uncle Luke. He's training some Force sensitive kids on Coruscant. You can go and train with them."

"I don't want to learn from Uncle Luke," Leia interrupted. "He can't teach me what I really want to know."

"And what do you want to know?" Rey asked hesitantly, fearing her answer.

"The Force is within me. I know that," Leia said firmly. "I want to be able to use it, and not for silly things like levitating objects and finding inner peace. I want to learn to control people, to bend them to my will. I want to learn to heal people, and even bring them back from the dead. I want to be able to use lightning-"

"You speak of the dark side," Rey interrupted sharply. "To learn these things will lead you nowhere good."

"But I want to know everything, and I know who I want to teach me."

Rey laughed lightly. "And just who do you think is great enough to teach you everything? That's a bit of a tall order."

"Kylo Ren," Leia answered simply, and Rey felt her blood go cold.

"Kylo Ren is dead," she said suddenly, her tone sharper than intended.

"I don't think so," her daughter countered. "He killed his master and disappeared. No one ever found a body, and no one ever saw him again. Who knows what he looks like under that mask? He could be anyone. I think he's hiding out somewhere, and I want to find him."

"That's a dangerous idea, Leia," Rey told her, her voice shaking slightly. "I won't allow you to do that. If you want to train, you will train with your uncle."

"Seriously mom?" Leia slammed her fists down on the table. She rose from the chair, glaring at Rey, anger rolling off of her in waves. "Tom gets everything! I ask for one thing, something that I want to do more than anything, and you say no! I hate you, and I hate this place! It's like a prison here!"

"Leia!"

The plates on the table rose and fell, shattering into a million pieces and the door slammed as Leia ran out, leaving Rey alone with the mess.

"What am I going to do with you," she whispered, half to herself, and half to her daughter who had already left.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ben held onto the rope he had tied to the cabin's roof. Tom handed a large piece of tin up to him, and he worked to swiftly secure it to the roof. The height, which would be concerning to some, didn't bother him. He was sure-footed and knew that he would not slip.

"Dad!" Tom called up to him, exasperated. "Can we please use the Force to do this? It would be so much faster!"

"Absolutely not!" Ben shouted back to his son, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. "This cabin is a masterpiece that must be built the old fashioned way."

He tacked the last piece of tin in place, and grinned widely at Tom's sigh. He climbed the rope down, even as he anticipated his son's question.

"But why?" Tom sighed again. "Why can't we just use the Force?"

"Because," Ben said matter-of-factly as he jumped down to stand next to his son. "It builds character. It will make you a better man. Your grandfather taught me, and now I'm teaching you."

He stepped back and looked at the almost complete cabin. It was small, but it would make an excellent first home for his son as he learned to become his own man.

"Thanks dad," Tom said solemnly. "For everything."

Ben nodded. "This house will do for now. I'm going to teach you everything I know, and one day all of this will be yours. Now you just need to find yourself a wife to share it with."

Ben smirked at his son, who's face immediately colored scarlet. He laughed, remembering a time when he too was a blundering idiot around women, especially a beautiful girl with a lightsaber, who had scarred his face and stolen his heart. Still she had loved him, misguided idiot he was, and a smile sprung to his face unbidden.

If a woman as perfect as Rey could love an angry, twisted, and bitter man like him, then his good-natured son would be just fine.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ben ran through the woods in the dead of night, only the red glow from his lightsaber guiding his path as he chased her. From the moment he met her, he had always been chasing her. He would gladly continue to chase her for all eternity, he thought with some amusement. Whatever it took. He had given himself to her completely. Even after all of these years, the chase was still the same. Age had slowed him some, but his mind and his will were still sharp as an executioner's axe.

A flash of blue was all that alerted him to Rey's presence. She jumped from the trees around him, and swung her lightsaber up to meet his. He grinned deviously, as they crackled together, and parried to meet her saber once again.

Their fight was a dance, one with which he was very familiar. They practiced so often that there was no real danger of either of them getting hurt. It was simply fun and games, and if Ben was being honest with himself, it was a helluva lot more interesting than most couple's foreplay.

He watched Rey as she parried and struck blow after blow, he lips stretched over a wide, carefree smile. In that moment, he almost wished that he had ruled the galaxy, if only so he could have her as his queen.

But no, he chuckled inwardly at himself. Rey would never allow it, which was yet another thing that he loved about her. She kept his ego in check. She was the light to his darkness. She kept him stable. She kept him grounded. And she was _his_.

Ben growled possessively, and met her saber one last time before turning his off and throwing it to the ground. Rey followed suit, and he pulled her into him roughly, immediately claiming her lips with his own.

She whimpered with desire as his tongue demanded and received entrance to her mouth. He backed her against the nearest tree, and suddenly there were far too many layers of clothing between them. With a few quick movements, he remedied the situation.

Ben picked Rey up and thrust into her as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He groaned in pleasure at the feel of her around him, and he took her in wild desperation. He wanted her, needed her, and _had_ to possess her completely.

When he was finished, Ben sank to the ground, pulling Rey with him softly. He held her between his legs, burying his face in her hair. The scent he associated with her and her alone filled his nostrils, slowing his erratic heart. With Rey, he was home.

"I love you," he mumbled softly into her hair.

"I know."

They stayed like that for some time, until Rey finally spoke, her voice muffled in his chest. "Leia's fascination with the dark side isn't just a phase."

"Oh?" Ben murmured.

"She was talking about it again today. She wants to buy a ship and go look for Kylo Ren, who she knows is alive. She wants him to train her."

"She'll be looking for a long time."

"You need to tell her, Ben," Rey sighed. "You need to tell her about Kylo Ren, and you need to talk to her about this unhealthy fixation she has with the dark side. I'm really worried about her."

Ben sighed deeply, placing a kiss on her forehead, and resting his chin on the back of her head. "I was hoping to spare them that. What will they think of me once they know the monster I am?"

"They will know you only as the good man you are now. They're old enough to understand. It's time you told them both, especially Leia," she added quickly. "She has your temper, you know?"

"You sure that's not from you?" Ben joked, to which he promptly received an elbow to the ribs. "I'll tell her tomorrow, I promise. I'll tell them both tomorrow."

"Thank you," Rey breathed.

They sat silently in the dark until they could barely keep their eyes open, and then they headed back to their house.

"I forgot to tell you," Rey laughed, as they walked hand in hand. "Phasma sent a letter saying that she and Hux would be here for the holidays this year."

"She still mad?"

"Yup."

"I thought after eighteen years she would let that go."

"Not a chance," Rey grinned. "She even included a picture of the newest toy we bought for her."

"Let me guess… Blaster?"

"Missile launcher. Gold plated. Almost as big as she is."

"Always a flair for the dramatic," Ben noted dryly.

"Not unlike someone else I know," Rey shot back.

"Are you calling me a drama queen?"

"Maybe I am," she challenged defiantly. "What are you going to do about it?"

"I'll show you what I'm going to do about it," he grinned, mischief dancing in his eyes, and then Rey was running, and Ben found himself chasing her once again.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Leia woke with a start, her very real dream still playing in her head. Someone had called to her, promising her strength and power beyond her wildest dreams. Everything she desired could be hers, the man had said. All she had to do in return was give him her allegiance.

Leia had to admit it was enticing. She was ambitious, and the man from her dreams would give her the galaxy, if only she swore her loyalty to him.

"But it was just a dream," she mumbled to herself as she rolled out of bed and headed to the bathroom. She stopped at the door, listening, as she heard Tom scribbling away from the kitchen. He always stayed up late, drawing out plans for the fields, what he was going to plant where, and all that farming nonsense she didn't give a shit about.

Living in a house full of force sensitive farmers made her crazier than a Hutt losing a bet. They were capable of doing anything, and yet they settled for mediocrity. It was downright embarrassing. Leia pushed on the door, but stopped at the sound of a voice in her head.

"See their lies," the strange voice hissed, grabbing her attention instantly.

"Tom?" she called out softly." If this was a joke, she decided that she was going to kill him, but her brother didn't respond.

"The office. The closet," the voice hissed in her head once again.

Curiosity got the better of her, and Leia found herself slowly inching towards her dad's office. It lay in the furthest corner of the house, built on shortly after Tom was born. Neither Tom nor Leia had ever been allowed in the office. Her dad had always told her that he kept farm documents in there, and they weren't allowed in because he wanted to keep it organized. Leia had never questioned him, but now that she truly thought about it, the excuse seemed hollow.

"What are you doing?" Tom whispered forcefully, as she placed her hand on the door to the office. "We're not supposed to go in there. You know the rules."

She turned to find him directly behind her, watching her every move with hawk-like intensity.

"What, are you going to tell on me?" she scoffed.

"Only if you force my hand," he replied guardedly.

"Tell on me, and I'll tell mom and dad about that girl that works in the cantina. You know, the one you go see every week."

Tom's face flushed scarlet, and he looked away. "Carry on," he told her stiffly, before walking off.

"See their lies," the voice in her head chanted again, as she placed her hand back on the door handle. With a flick of her wrist, the door unlocked and pulled forward, revealing the office within. It was small and sparsely decorated, but a few things caught her eye immediately.

One wall was adorned with photographs. Some of the people she recognized, others she didn't. Her grandfather, Tom. Her grandmother and namesake, Leia. Han Solo. She knew them. The others she did not know, but most sported either a Resistance or First Order insignia.

Leia had known of her grandmother's involvement with the Resistance, and there was Aunt Phasma, who had been with the First Order since before she was born. She had known about them, but she had no idea that her parents were so well connected to the former enemy forces. Beneath the photos, sat a bowl filled with ashes and a badly mangled helmet.

"Is this?" Leia began, but stopped when the voice filled her head once again.

"The closet. See their lies," he hissed.

She walked across the office, and opened the door to the tiny closet, gasping when she saw what was inside.

A helmet with silver around the eyes sat on a shelf at the back, with a cloak hung beside it. Next to the helmet and cloak were two lightsabers. One was simple in design, and the other had one vent on top and two on the sides, giving it the appearance of a crusader sword. From her studies, Leia instantly knew whom this particular lightsaber belonged to.

"Kylo Ren," she whispered reverently, as she reached out to touch the saber.

"See their lies," the voice hissed again. "Your family is not simply the farmers they have led you to believe."

"But…it can't be… That would mean…"

"Yes."

"Hurt, anger, and betrayal swept through her. "All this time…"

"You deserve better," the voice hissed. "They lied to you. You can never reach your full potential with them. I can train you. I can give you power beyond your wildest dreams. You only need to swear loyalty to me. Join me, and rule the galaxy at my side."

A thousand emotions played through her. Her father, the man she had thought was merely a boring farmer, was in fact Kylo Ren. He never told her, never trusted her with that secret. He was holding her back.

"What do I need to do?" she whispered.

"Take the lightsaber. Go to the nearest town and buy a ship. I will guide to me from there. But first, swear yourself to me."

Leia closed her eyes; letting all of the thoughts that filled her head, tumble out. Once her head was empty, she thought only about her future and where she wanted to be. Her family had lied to her. She could never reach her potential here. She had to leave.

"I swear," she vowed as she took Kylo Ren's lightsaber in her hands and ignited it, the crimson glow spilling across her face.

She could have sworn she heard the voice in her head laughing as she left everything she had ever known behind for the promise of the stars.

 **So… that's it…. I hope you enjoyed the epilogue, even though it was long overdue. I was worried that I might have made Leia too dramatic, but at school I gave a kid some work she missed while she was out with softball last week, and her response was "you're ruining my life" so I decided Leia and her teenage angst was totally okay lol.**

 **As always, please leave me some love if you enjoyed the story! It makes my day when I hear from you guys! Also, I am taking a break from my novel as I see about publishing, and I am writing another fanfic! Gasp! It will be a Thor/Jane/Loki fic I am calling Brothers of Fortune. It will much longer than this one, with WAY more plot, so if you're interested in the Thor fandom and want to check out my work, please do so! If you want to follow me so you can get updates, I totally won't think you're a creeper. I promise! It will probably be a few weeks until I post the first chapter for that, but check it out when you have time!**

 **Thank you all! Until next time.**

 **-Boss**


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